Well it's deja vu all over again. The only thing left is the speech at Columbia...
Once again, Iran has proven 2 things. That the UN is indeed made up of a bunch of total idiots, and that America thinks Iran's President is Iran's leader.
OK this is for the Americans, (there is sadly no hope for the UN), all da Iranians in da house can go outside and play, while Uncle V 'splains it to Lucy.
OK, Americans, hear me now and listen to me later, Iran's President is a big joke on you, and Iranians. He isn't really a President. He pretends to be one, as a way to deflect any attention on the real "man who Would be King", namely Ayatollah Khamenei, who proclaimed himself as much, in 1989 whne he skipped the appolicaiton process, and gave himself an A on his own final exam, beocming the first person in history to share an official title with a Pizza.
So, Khamenie = real leader of Iran
Rouhani = creepily friendly pretend leader.
OK bacheha, come on back now, Ali, put down the Cyrus Scroll, you're going to break it. Then, who's going to pay the British Museum? Huh? Ki poolesho mideh?
To prove Rouhani's nebulous enigma, someone apparently with official authority to do so, apparently read about marketing online and heard that all startups when they don't actually have a product, or anything to sell, put out a presskit.
Yes, Rouhani has a presskit! Now, I'm not sure it's the real one, or some sort of glorious joke. Either way I loved it. The reason I think it might be fake, is that it was published on Weebly.com. Weebly is great place to put up a free website. And I would expect Rouhani's staff do not spare any expense to convvince the West. A free website on weebly? I don't know. Maybe the sanctions are hurting average ordinary Iranian presidents harder than we thought.
Here's just a few lines of hilarity:
IN the section "The Real Rouhani" (as opposed to the fake one), the title starts of with a wonerfully hilarious "Who is Hassan Rouhani? I'd like a deeper look..." which, now that I think about it, I kind of am getting grossed out. But there's more!
And I quote, (verbatim);
"Little is known about Hassan Rouhani's personal life. He is believed to be married to Sahabeh Arabi Rouhani, who was 14 years of age at the time they married, and to be the father of 5. Further details are conflicting, unconfirmed or simply non-existent, in the grand tradition of Iranian politics..."
Yet more proof for the 'Merkins in attendance. Hint: When there is "little known about" the President of your country, that's usually a very bad sign.
But this is the Iranian President! So it gets worse.
Although it is not certain, he is believed to be married. Again, not good. And again it gets worse. Rouhani maried his bride, when she was 14. Technically in the US, statutory rape is uner 16. If however Rouhani was 17 or younger when he married Sahabeh, we could excuse it under the "Romeo and Juliet clause" but somehow, I don't think their "romance" was consensual.
As all Islamic republic details go, of course, this too is unconfirmed and simply non-existent. Which if you buy that, then you also buy into the "...grand tradition of Iranian politics..." .
OK enough lambasting the fake President of Iran. It's too easy anyhow.
Tomorrow however, Rouhani will likely make his plea for and beg the US to lift sanctions. In as round about and subtly cryptic way he can. He will tempt Obama to shake his hand. If Obama touches Rouhani's sleeve tomorrow, then lunch will most certainly be on, and immediately ordered for everyone. And a small Falafel shop in NY will be a very happy Falafel shop in NY. But please! For God's sake hold the hummus! The last thing needed is for the Iranians to ask the Americans if they would like more Hamas?
Seriously, tomorrow's events, and the resulting after effects, could begin a very long and narrow road for Free Iranians. Those of us who want Iran to reform, wince as the US all but endorses a VERY BAD POLITICAL SYSTEM, insuring it's continued survival by approving it with talks and diplomacy. On the other hand, if Iranian politicians like Rouhani don't stretch out the hand to give Iran a sense and taste of what it feels like to be on the good side of the US for a change, how can reform really take place?
Clearly you can't get there from here.
I don't pretend to know what I want to happen tomorrow. All I know is that I Object to the current form of the Iranian government, and that I want Iran to be free from Tyranny and the Oppressive Brutal rule it is currently under. Especially I want automatic religious rule gone.
Like you, I'll be watching and hoping for the best, expecting the worst. Once again, yet more proof that the shame is indeed upon us for letting things get to this. To think we had freedom in our hands and sat and did nothing as a mad bushy browed heretic took it away with nary a whimper. OK maybe there was slightly more than a whimpering. OK full screaming. But still... it most certainly sucks being us.