Advice: Sex with someone’s wife??

I better be careful with this one as it comes from non other than Kobra Khanoom, our resident expert on advice. She asked: why is there so much gang-banging and multiple partner sex in porn? Why do men like it so much? Many men have fantasies of their woman being fucked by another man. I suppose there is vicarious pleasure in it. Most women are much more possessive and much less likely to enjoy sharing their partner.


Dear Kobra Khanoom; I think you answered part of your own question earlier in your note: Nature, including the “Darwinian evolutionary equation” requires for men and women to reproduce. A man increases his chances of reproduction by having sex with as many women as possible in order to send his army of sperms to search for as many eggs as possible, while a woman already gets millions of sperm from one man in one encounter and only requires one to actually impregnate her egg.

Now as to why men have this fantasy of having someone else fuck their women? I believe that to be a fashionable thing now, at least in the porn industry. When I was growing up, or at least the kind of porn that was available to me (late 70’s and early 80’s) you’d hardly ever see that, unless it was part of a swap thing; you get my wife and I get yours. For multiple partners, it was mostly a guy fucking two females, usually college-roommates, friends or co-workers. The portion of the porn industry that caters to men (probably over 95% of it,) always goes after what is the current trend, which is regularly what is also “exotic” and unusual. Open relationships, Asian chicks, wife swapping, group sex, humongous tits, anal play, water sports, toys, S&M of various strength, plus many other “fads” have been exploited. Some have come and gone, while others enjoy an ongoing following. Currently (according my own extensive research for the purpose of this piece only!) all the rage is: amateurs fucking in public, MILFs (if you don’t know what that is, go research!) and wives enjoying a stranger’s very large penis, often with the husband present.

Why don’t women enjoy the same? Aside from how much of that is cultural and the way women all over the world have been raised over generations to look at sex as primarily a form of bonding as well as reproduction instead of pleasure, I think they also lack that second head that often strays us men in directions that should have never been explored to begin with.

Now only if there was a middle ground….

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