I always thought it is good to give your husband a sense that he is needed. For the same reason, I always used to ask my husband’s help on the works to be done around the house. Not that I don’t know how to change a light bulb, put tiles in the bathroom, paint the whole house, or my new project today assembling the bookcase. However, I always asked for his help in each and all of those ecept the last one. I thought in a sense I was helping him with his self-confidence and how I relied on him being the MAN of the house. Meanwhile, knowing how to do all by myself, I showed my respect and appreciation in his help and what would I have done without him? Right? Wrong!
It was proven to me today that my husband thinks it is a sickness to be “needed” or “in need” of someone!!! No matter how much I tried to make him understand that it is important and satisfying to be needed in a relationship, he still thought it is a sickness!
I promised myself not to ask him any more of those pretentious favor, although some of them were not pretentious and I really enjoyed him doing something for me. This morning, after two weeks, I took the bookcase that we bought from IKEA inside and despite of the heavy package I took it all the way to the study room and started asembling it. Was it hard? At all. Did I enjoy doing it, you bet. I felt I no longer want to be dependent of him and thank God he calls it sickness. Now, my fear is how much independence is too much? Doea he care if I do everything by myself and never again ask for his help? Where does that lead our new relationship to? I have to wonder, if you are strong emotionally, physically, and financially then what is the need for another person in your life?
