Hajiagha finds a girl-friend (Episode 2)

 

(((Three parentheses means that person is thinking to self)))

 Hajiagha and Roya are watching TV 

H: This dancing EStars show sucks.  I don’t know why you watch it; you know we can never dance like that.

R: Dancing WITH THE Stars and don’t be so vein.  Not everything is about you.  I watch it for entertainment.

H: what entertainment?  In Canada children young as 13 …

R: yeah, yeah, yeah (shaking her hand at Haji)

H: children young as 8?

R:

H: 7?

R: drop it Haji

H: Okay! Ookay! (((I wonder if I should talk about Ahmadinejad.  Should I ask or just do it?  Do it! Hehehe!)))

R: I like the girls this time

H: I like the boxing guy

R: he is like a mule

H: he is strong and brave like Ahmadinejad

Roya looks at him with surprise and rolls her eyes

H: The Iranian people got it right.  They voted for the right man.  He is the best President anyone has ever had and ….

R: yes of course

H: yes as I was saying, President Ahmadinejad is a true patriot …

R: patriot?? come on man let me watch my show.  The hell with Ahmadinejad that 2-bit scum bag!

H: so when can I talk about him? He is an honorable man and won the election fair and square …

R: fair and square? why did he resort to killings and torture and shutting down internet and media and …

H: media is not like in Canada …

R: yeah like he blames Israel you blame Canada …

H: But Canada is the root of all our problems …

R: what problems? That scum bag says Iran has no problems …

H: our problems here …

R: we don’t have problems here

H: children young as 10?

R:  why not show how well you’ve won by proving to everyone you’ve won and be happy about it …

H: well

R: well nadare

H: chera dare.  Last week everyone said Iran is right about nuclear stuff …

R: nuclear? What happened to beeeeeraaaave Ahmadi?  Wasn’t he ‘Da man? He gave up his precious uranium …

H: no he didn’t …

R: oh yes he did …

H: oh-no-you-didn’t …. Haji shaking his head left and right

R: Haji you’re funny do you even know that phrase and shaking your head like that is Gay?!

H: really? I hate gays …

R: do you even know what uranium is?

H: yes President Ahmadinejad said they are giving away 20% enriched to Russia …

R: you don’t even know uranium much less the % of it. Easy and simple, Iran gave up their uranium where they didn’t want to give up before.  They gave up because they are beat in Iran. And outside Iran they don’t even let his ass go to a restaurant …

H: whatever nuclear is Iran’s right

R: well why did he give up that right?

H: he didn’t

R: yekke bedo nakon!

H: you’re doing it not me

R: I didn’t even want to talk politics … just wanted to watch my show which by the way I’m missing!

H: okay I go get some tea

R: you keep saying nonsense about Ahmadi and all that crap

H: okay the hell with Ahmadi.  They are all the same anyway

R: I hope you remember it next time when the Ahmadi’s itch catches you again, but the Haji that I know can not let this one go.  I guess it is too juicy for you

H: yes it is.  Yes it is!  He is like the gift that keeps giving to everyone in all angles and all positions!  Israel likes him, Obama doesn’t like him anymore but he likes Obama. And Iranians in Canada, well Iranians are all messed up anyway.  Who better than him to piss them off?!  LOL!

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Later that night at bed time  

H: come here azizam … mooch

R: leave it Haji you aggravated me too much tonight and now this?

H: that was then this is now

R: I just can’t turn it off and on like you do

H: so what can I do?

R: I don’t know

H: okay at least can you do something?

R: am I singing yasin, what thing?  I’m sleepy and tired, worked all week. (((I’m just too tired, maybe later)))

H: this GF-BF thing is not at all like I imagined.  I thought there would be Baghala Pollo every night with sex as desert.

R: well apparently it isn’t.  Aren’t you glad you found that out?

———————————————-

Early next morning in bed

H:  yawn (((should I poke her?)))

Haji pokes her in sleep

R: what? What time is it?

H: it’s about 7:30

R: okay but it is weekend let’s sleep in

H: oookay but my Bijan is a morning person and he is UP!

R: well my Manijeh is not a morning person at all and she is sleep

H: oookay so let’s put my Bijan back to sleep too

R: no

H: Okay I’ll go get some tea again.  So later today?

R: only if you’re a good boy

H: of course when am I not pleasant?!

R: when?

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