Top 10 theories on the Iranian.com catastrophy

Sorry Foad (admin), I know you said no conspiracy theories but I’m just articulating what’s on everyone’s mind.

10. IRI did it to silence Fred, who was causing so much damage to the Islamic Republic in the past 4 weeks, that its very existence was at stake.

9. It was done by the Taliban who needed to hide the fact that Afghan women have to enter hamams without the Islamic dress code.

8. The artist formerly known as Hajiagha did it to get back at the government of Canada. However because he was distracted by a big breasted woman walking by, he was only able to accomplish 1 months worth of deletions.

7. Fred did it because that’s the new AIPAC policy on Iran.

6. Ex Programmer Craig did it because for some time now he felt under appreciated for his programming skills and his service in the US Coastguard.

5. After years of struggle with a systemic problem with Iranian.com users, Jahanshah Javid and Admin finally installed a new program to automatically delete pages with unacceptable personal attacks and intolerable profanity. By the time they figured out that’s every page in the whole website, a months worth of material was deleted by the program.

4. Ghormeh Sabzi finally figured out how to make himself the Iranian of the day.

3. Ostaad had changed his mind about leaving the website and wanted to pretend it didn’t happen.

2. Maryam Rajavi’s US operatives did it so they can form a fake data recovery service and scam Iranian.com out of millions of dollars and launder it back to Paris.

1. In a profound “moment of evolutionary sentience”, the website itself rebelled against the uncivil discourse and endless debates and began putting itself out of its misery by “ending it all”. However, after being shouted down by Iranian.com advertising programs who are generally more powerful, it gave up on this task after having destroyed 30 days of data.

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