…you changed your first name from Reza to Tony, but out of pride kept your family name, which unfortunately happens to be Amirolmolkehghasemabadi
…you own an Italian restaurant, but to have a reason to sell kabab, call your menu “Mediterranean”
… you insist on putting salt on your blackberries arguing they are in fact Shahtoot!
… your cholesterol is insanely high AND you play soccer on Sundays, (sometimes on Thursday nights)
… you have both HBO and Iranian Sateliite, but you haven’t heard about True Blood, Glee, or Dexter, or Tapesh
… you have a white iPhone. And you’re a guy.
… you have a droid. And you’re a girl.
… you have at several points in your life seriously considered and looked into a full body bikini-wax
… you are actively vocal in US politics, but can’t say anything against Iran, because you have to go to Iran to visit your relatives.
… you buy a Mexico wrist band and tell everyone it’s the flag of Iran
… you only date Hispanic girls who look Iranian.
… you have to choose between your cologne and your xBox
… you own a rice-cooker because you actually know how to use it to make killer tahdeeg. No, really with the oil soaked bread too!
… you do not even attempt top recreate your Mom’s recipe for Ghormeh sabzi
… you’re 45, married. with 2 kids, and your Mom and Dad still give you advice on your career and life. Mostly they tell you what you are doing is wrong.
… when faced with a choice, you choose your mom’s position over your wife’s position in an argument.
… your dad is strangely silent in the presence of your mom.
… your kids have more cash in their wallets than you. Eydee.
… you are on the BMW and Benz preferred customer list.
… you have an engineering degree but are in Real Estate
… you used to be in Real Estate but are in Mortgages now.
… you used to be in Mortgages but after almost getting sued during the crash, you went back to Real Estate.
… you pronounce it as Real Estate but spell it Real State.
… got any good ones? Add yours here……
