10 reasons why the Islamic Republic will last another 100 years

I mentioned once before somewhere on these boards: The Iranian would bend over and take it in the ass from a mullah while shouting absurdities against Israel, rather than be friends with America.

Bizarre but true. The Iranian of 2012 is one true weirdo. 

Here are the glaring traits of the Iranian in 2012:

1. Khod bozorg bin: That theyre fucking special in the world. So you have a 3000 year history? honestly, who gives a shit? Your country TODAY is fucked as hell. Instead of mocking the 300 year history of the US, go and try to figure why is it that your country is ruled by the most retarded fools ever to walk the earth? The dudes literally burn their foreheads to make people think they are men of God!

2. Anti-semitic and racist: “Israel this. Israel that. And btw, jews really dont deserve the Nobel prizes they win. It’s political.” and dont forget “Tork-e khar“, “Ahay Afghani!”, etc…

3. Has a deep problem with women: A woman as a leader?!!! pffft! The constitution says REJAAL! Imam Ali called them “half-brained”! And “the Germans are stupid for making a woman their chancellor! What morons!” Why fight nature? Allah created women for pro-creation! And indeed women are loaded! Mashallah! And by the way, it’s OK for me to go around sleeping with every slut I can find visiting the Ukraine during my single years, but if a girl has pre-marital sex, she has to have surgery and make herself aak-band, because girls must go as virgins to the house of the bakht!

4. Superstitious as hell: “read this dua 7 times, it will heal your nafkh”, and how about a Dua for keeping Jinns away?

5. A slave of religion: Whether Islam, Zoroastrian, etc, they HAVE TO BE part of some fuckin ideology cult. “Karbala is heaven on Earth!”

6. The indisputable world champion of crazy conspiracy theories:HAARP has caused the Persian Gulf dolphins near Kish to die in groups. Mousavi is a zionist! The US Marines are trying to kill Imam Zaman in Iraq!”

7. The eternal believer in central authority: Whether it’s Imam Zaman, Soshyant, Ghebleye aalam, or Velayat-e faqih. The Iranian believes in being a duty-bound follower, not in civic responsibility. The dowlat is not responsible for keeping darakeh clean. YOU ARE!

8. Stupid as hell: So Stanford U has so many Iranians they are naming cafes and trees after Iranians now. But just tell me this, if youre so fuckuing smart, how in God’s name did you entrust your country to a total illiterate who claimed he could make electricity/utilities “free”? Dont tell me it was the face on the Moon! What the fuck were you thinking when he said “MAN dowlat ta’een mikonam. MAN tooye dahan-e een dowlat mizanam”? Didnt you hear his man manam echoing everywhere? Indeed, the crown is now a turban, and the Iranian of 2012 still thinks there was a revolution.

9. Crazy xenophobic: like the Brits and Americans Are dying to get a piece of their land for 200 years. One pristine national park in the US is 3 times the size of your Ardebil Province you dumb fuck! Nobody’s out to get you! Youre hairy, ungrateful, and are always living in the past.

10. Always in mourning: No culture on Earth glamorizes suffering and mourning like Iranian shias do. They literally enjoy khak be sar shodan. Why else do you think theyre so eager to go to war against the US Navy? They literally want to eternalize themselves by becoming shahid like Hosein. Becoming mazloom and losing a war against the US will engrave their name forever like Hosein, the “master of martyrs”. Having a mental condition is a religious value for the Iranian of 2012.

So rest assured, this regime will last 100 more years, simply because it’s feeded by a cuture of stupidity in which people refuse to change or even acknowledge. In the words of Fred, Tabrik!

Meet Iranian Singles

Iranian Singles

Recipient Of The Serena Shim Award

Serena Shim Award
Meet your Persian Love Today!
Meet your Persian Love Today!