Review of “The Origin of Species.”

Just less than 4 billion years have passed since life began on Earth in the hope that it would quickly invent religion and say God did it. Today this is judged by many to be a disaster.  It turned out that creatures decided to start small, single celled and pretty much with no sense of Jesus. So it took almost 4 billion years for some creatures to invent religion. But in a blink of the geologic eye religion was discredited by Reason and the Scientific method.

In The Origin of Species, Charles Darwin tries to account for this failure. Why did a collection of aimless molecules fail to come together in a body with arms and legs in just six days, equipped with brains enough to invent fiction?  Darwin had advocated against such miracles and now he is determined to explain why they are wrong.

Although Mr. Darwin is far from disinterested in the science of biology, The Origin of the Species is written with an ersatz air of objective analysis, employing coolly neutral tone and a prose straight out of the Proceedings of the Royal Society of London. It is a shame that he didn’t write in the style of Emily Bronte because I really like Italian literature.

Beneath the book’s slick presentation, anti-religion animus simmers.  Mr. Darwin never gives the Bible a chance and writes as though the Archbishop of Canterbury doesn’t know what he is talking about. Not only that, he married his own cousin. That is just gross, don’t you think? Besides he was seriously sick when he wrote his book, and we can’t believe the words of someone who gets nauseous a lot because that is an illness and so is having a brain disorder.

Now that I have thoroughly refuted Charles Darwin’s Origin of Species, I will send this review to Fall Street Journal and have the Archbishop of Canterbury put in a good word for me. The editor told me that he would jump out the building if his arm were twisted to publish this insightful review, but I don’t think he has the guts.

First published in the Fall Street Journal. But don’t bother clicking on the link; they’ve all jumped out the window.

Author
Mr. Ari Siletz is an Iranian-American writer who contributes to Iranian.com and sees potential in what NIAC is doing for the evolution of U.S. Iran relations.

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