What would you say?

I was picking up SweetPea from school when this woman I had never seen before slipped in as I opened the gate and started bombarding me with questions:

-Shoma irooni hasstin? (You Iranian?)

-Bachatoon chand vaghte miyaad injaa? (How long has your son been coming here?)

-Raazi hasstin? (Are you satsified?)

-Moalemma khooban? (Are the teachers good?)

blah blah blah and on and on.  Normally I don’t mind answering any questions by a prospective new student’s mom or dad but then, this woman then concluded, without missing a beat, in the most disgusting and vulgar tone imaginable:

-Siaa Miaa Ziyaad hasst? (Many blacks here?)

I was dumbfounded.  What kind of a question was that?  What response should I give?  Do I even honor this batshit query with any response at all?  Number of options presented themselves:

Angry: “Khak bar saret you stupid, ignorant racist!”

Friendly: “This place is way too black for you, may I suggest a school in Antartica?”

Political: “Think more Obama, less Newt.”

Historical: Wake up lady, this is 2012 in California not 1912 in Mississipi!”

Lawyerly: “It depends on what your definition of black is.”

Threatening: “Black? I’ll give you something black… a Black Eye!”

Diplomatic: “Like all educational institutions that reflect our society in a microcosm, this one is very diverse.  Yup… Very diverse indeed. And urban.  Diverse and urban, yup, that’s it.”

What would you have said?

Meet Iranian Singles

Iranian Singles

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Meet your Persian Love Today!