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Agha Mehti
Can't keep still in one country

By Mohandes
March 17, 2000
The Iranian

"If I see that S.O.B. who convinced me to come to Canada I know how to deal with him! Oh! I so miss being in Spain!"

This is what Agha Mehti told me in Persian last summer during my visit to Canada. We were introduced by a mutual friend, who told him I was coming from Europe.

Agha Mehti is a small man with a curved body and a a typical northern Persian face. When I asked him if he was a shomali, he said: "What? Are you kidding me?!". So, he corrected me and said he is from Tehroon!

He then told me that he lived in Spain for a while before heading for Canada, under the impression that Canada is the lost paradise and all foreigners are happy and prosperous there. I read between his lines that he felt he is being wasted in this crude country.

As he was talking, I thought to myself: Have I ever met any Iranian abroad who was satisfied with his/her situation? I honestly don't think so. Agha Mehti wasn't the first and surely he won't be the last.

"What have you done in Spain?" I asked him.

"Everything that you can imagine!" he replied.

"And what do you do here?"


He wished he could go back to Europe, the land of "culture" and "history", as he put it. "Europe has got class!" he said. I wondered, What has European history got to do with him?

Agha Mehti is a no nonsense, straightforward man. He is not like those Iranians who claim they have lost their Ph.D. degrees during Iraqi bombing raids and now have a hard time driving cabs. He is not like many who claim they had a chance to go to the U.S. right away (sar-zarb!), but went to Canada instead.

Agha Mehti, who got himself smuggled into Canada, shares a common characteristic with many of us. He is a boaster (gondeh gooz). I do not know why so many of our sayings about boasting are compared with breaking wind, i.e. "gondeh gooz", "baa gooz derakht shekoondan", "man aan-am keh Rostam bovad pahlevaan" (Oops! The theory doesn't hold for the last one!).

I wonder if Agha Mehti knows any of the Iranian chatrooms I frequent on the Internet? I have seen his problems discussed often. If Agha Mehti does chat online with other Iranians, he could feel better and realize that he is not alone.

"You know? I was reading an article a couple of days ago," I told Agha Mehti, "that said we Iranians are a 'rider nation'. Maybe that is the reason why we cannot sit calmly in one place," or as my mother says: "Koonemoon neshast nadareh!"

Agha Mehti looked doubtful and said nothing. I felt ashamed and tried not to continue. The third friend smiled.

On my way back to Vienna, I thought about Agha Mehti. I knew his likes in Iran before they left "hell", as they put it, and I saw them in Turkey, Bulgaria, Japan and India where they were waiting to get into any country. Many of them arrived in their dreamlands but are still not satisfied.

Our Agha Mehti forgets where he is coming from. He is always thinking about where he wants to go. Here and now apparently do not mean anything to him.

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