Iranian-friendly restrooms
The Iranian
May 1997
From an April Fool's joke distributed among a group of Iranians in Silicon Valley, California.
In an effort to resolve a serious cultural problem relating to professinals of Iranian descent, a thirteen member council of Silicon Valley executives has been formed.
The purpose of this committee is to develop a comprehensive plan to address a problem from which the entire community of Iranian professionals has suffered. This issue has emerged on so many occasions that corporate executives feared lawsuits from leaders of the Iranian community in the U.S.
Entertaining as it may seem, many Iranian employees have complained about the lack of proper sanitary means of cleansing themselves after using the toilet. The traditional approach involves the use of water in a container, known as "aftabeh", for proper cleansing and disinfection. More modern households, however, utilize a "shelang", which is usually a plastic hose surrounded by a flexible metal shell.
As a result, a recommendation has been made to retrofit all toilets with either an aftabeh or shelang. The retrofit costs are approximately $24.30 per stahl for the shelang, and as little as $3.00 for an aftabeh. An aftabeh requires no fixtures for installation, therefore, companies with tight budgets are recommended to take this route if cost is an issue.
It is estimated that these initial fixed costs can be recovered in a relatively short time due to the reduction in the use of toilet paper. The payback period for a shelang is one year and for an aftabeh, only three months.
Given the fact that this method of purification has been around for thousands of years, it is unlikely that it will be replaced or become obsolete by a new technology. As a result, the expected life of both of these devices is unlimited.
In choosing one of the two applications, it is appropriate for companies to consider the advantages and disadvantages of each solution:
* Aftabehs are low cost, require no installation, and can be shared among many users. On the other hand, however, they can be stolen or misplaced.
* Shelangs are more pleasing to the eye, as they can be considered to be an integral part of the toilet fixture. The only major drawbacks of a shelang is its higher cost and immobility across stahls.
The thirteen member committee will formulate its recommendations and make it mandatory for all companies to follow its directive. This will be finalized on April 2, equivalent to 13 Farvardin 1376, making this the "doroogh-e sizdah" (13th day lie) for the year!
May your new year be filled with happiness.
