April 21, 2000
Bitter, angry woman
This is a reference to a letter sent by one of your readers ... in regard
to a letter titled "Khodeti".
In her letter, she complains about how the Iranian community puts down
single girls living on their own, and how they are labeled as "kharaab".
Even though I agree with her, it is amazing how true this is about her.
I had the opportunity to meet this girl in person. We both live in the
same city. When I saw her, she made a very nice impression and we both
became good friends.
She told me about her past and how she has survived a harsh life. Unfortunately,
this harsh life has made her a bitter, angry woman who becomes hostile
toward any kindness. She has experienced everything you could imagine
about a lonely single girl in a city.
She seems to love Iranian culture, but doesn't understand the rules.
I noticed, how her behavior changed after she found out that I had told
my parents about our relationship. First, she was unhappy, then she told
her parents about us.
After a while, she seemed so attached to me that she refused to go ahead
with her transfer to another state which she truly loved to go to. She
said she wants to stay because she has something better here. She was referring
I was happy that she was in love with me. But that was just a dream.
A few days later, she was invited to my parents house for the new year
(Noruz). She was not happy about it. Two days later, her personality
turned 180 degrees. She said she doesn't wan to see me. I tried to understand
I found out she had been on Prozac. She had abused controlled substances
when she was younger, and she was an alcoholic. She had been with many
different abusing men. I could not believe the things I was finding out.
I knew the relationship was over. However, I still wanted to help her
cope with her problem. She is unbelievable. She wouldn't let me put sense
into her head. She dropped a bomb on me: She said I was harassing her
and made her scared. I tried to let her know that the things she is experiencing
is from side effects of using Prozac, and her previous abusive relationships.
I guess my point goes back to the original article that event though
we tend to label people without knowing much about them, somehow it all
comes true. I still hope the best for this girl and wish her to get professional