January 31, 2002
George W. In The Garden Of Gethsemane
By Michael Moore
Michael Moore.com
January 30, 2002
Dear George,
When it's all over in a couple months, and you're packing up your pretzels
and Spot and heading back to Texas, what will be your biggest regret? Not
getting out more often and seeing the sights around Rock Creek Park? Never
once visiting the newly-renovated IKEA in Woodbridge, Virginia? Or buying
your way to the White House with money from a company that committed the
biggest corporate swindle in American history? I got a feeling you didn't
miss much by not spending an entire Saturday afternoon assembling a Swedish
bookcase -- but you should have known that there was no way you would ever
finish your term by hopping into bed with Kenneth Lay.
It's kind of sad when you think about it. Here you were -- the most popular
president ever! -- the recipient of so much good will from your fellow Americans
after September 11, and then you had to go and blow it. You just couldn't
stay away from your old cowpoke friend from Texas, Kenneth Lay.
Kenny has always been there for you. You needed a way to fly around to
all the primaries and campaign stops in the 2000 election -- so Kenny gave
you his corporate jet. Did you tell the voters when you arrived in each
city that the bird you flew in on was from a billionaire who was secretly
conspiring to give the bird to all his employees and investors? He flew
you around America on the Enron company jet, and for that favor you touched
down on tarmac after tarmac to tell your fellow citizens that you were "going
to restore dignity to the White House, the people's house." You said
this standing in front of an Enron jet!
Man, you loved Lay so much, you not only affectionately referred to him
as "Kenny Boy," you interrupted an important campaign trip in
April, 2000, to fly back to Houston for the Astro's opening day at the new
Enron Field -- just so you could watch Kenny Boy Lay throw out the first
pitch. How sentimental!
I mean, you loved this man so intensely that, when you were awarded a
set of keys the Supreme Court had made for you so you could live in the
White House, you invited Kenny Boy to set up shop -- at 1600 Pennsylvania
Avenue! He interviewed those who would hold high-level Energy Department
positions in your administration.
You not only let Kenny Boy decide who would head the regulatory agency
that oversaw Enron, you let him hand-pick the new chairman of the Securities
and Exchange Commission, Harvey Pitt -- a former lawyer for his accountant,
Arthur Andersen! Kenny and the boys at Andersen also worked to make sure
that accounting firms would be exempt from numerous regulations and would
not be held liable for any "funny bookkeeping" (don't you wish
you were this forward-thinking?).
The rest of Kenny Boy's time was spent next door with his old buddy,
Dick Cheney (Enron and Halliburton, as you'll recall, got the big contracts
from your dad to "rebuild" Kuwait after the Gulf War). Lay and
Dick formed an "energy task force" (Operation Enduring Graft)
which put together the county's new "energy policy." This policy
then went on to shut down every light bulb and juicer in the state of California.
And guess who made out like bandits while "trading" the energy
California was in desperate need of? Kenny Boy and Enron! No wonder Big
Dick doesn't want to turn over the files about those special meetings with
Lay!
The only thing that surprises me more than all the Enron henchmen who
ended up in your cabinet and administration is how our lazy media just rolled
over and didn't report it. The list of Enron people on your payroll is impressive.
Lawrence Lindsey, your chief economic advisor? A former advisor at Enron!
Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill? Former CEO of Alcoa, whose lobbying firm,
Vinson and Elkins, was the #3 contributor to the your campaign! Who is Vinson
and Elkins? The law firm representing Enron! Who is Alcoa? The top polluter
in Texas. Timothy White, the Secretary of the Army? A former vice-chair
of Enron Energy! Robert Zoellick, your Federal Trade Representative? A former
advisor at Enron! Karl Rove, your main man at the White House? He owned
a quarter-million dollars of Enron stock.
Then there's the Enron lawyer you have nominated to be a federal judge
in Texas, the Enron lobbyist who is your chair of the Republican Party,
the two Enron officials who now work for House Majority Leader Tom DeLay,
and the wife of Texas Senator Phil Gramm who sits on Enron's board. And
there's the aforementioned Mr. Pitt, the former Arthur Andersen attorney
whose job it is now as SEC head to oversee the stock markets. George, it
never stops! My fingers are getting tired typing all this up -- and there's
lots more.
Don't get me wrong, George -- I do not think you're an evil man. You
don't need any crap from people like me -- heck, you got mother-in-law problems!
Now, I have a very good relationship with my mother-in-law, but then, I
never told her to put $8,000 of her money into a company my administration
knew was going belly-up.
You say you didn't know? Your bag man -- Don Evans, the man who squeezed
all that money for you from Enron as your campaign finance chairman (and
is now collecting his reward as your Commerce Secretary) -- has admitted
that he got calls from Enron begging for help last year because they were
going under. Didn't he tell you this?
Then Paul O'Neill, your Treasury Secretary, admitted that Enron and Kenny
Boy called him, too, for some special favors to save Enron. Didn't he mention
this to you? They claim to have called your chief of staff, Andrew Card,
and he said he didn't bother to inform you. What does your mother-in-law
think about these boys her daughter's husband consorts with?
I love watching the O'Neill and Evans show. What a couple of cut-ups!
They're, like, all proud of themselves for "not doing Enron any favors."
Actually, I think it's more like they didn't do your MOTHER-IN-LAW any favors.
Enron got LOTS of favors. And why not? Kenny Boy has been your number one
financial backer since you ran for governor.
No other American or Saudi has given you more money than Kenny Boy and
his gang at Enron. O'Neill, Evans, Cheney, Energy Secretary Spencer Abraham
-- ALL of them gave Lay and Enron special favors from day one. The New York
Times last May was so concerned about how Kenny had the run of the place
(1600 Pennsylvania Ave.), they referred to Lay as the "shadow advisor
to the president."
And what advice! Who was it that wanted you to deregulate the energy
industry further? Kenny Boy! Who was it that convinced you to explore the
sick idea of PRIVATIZING our water supply and then allow private corporations
to "trade" it in the future? Kenny Boy! Who was it that wanted
Social Security to be tied to the stock market?
Yup, Kenny Boy! (Imagine, if you will, what would have happened to our
precious Social Security funds had they been invested in Enron stocks as
you, George, suggested be done during your campaign as yuppies everywhere
clucked along in agreement over that genius idea.)
O'Neill's and Evans's admission that they "did nothing" when
Enron told them of the company's shell game and impending collapse is reason
enough for you and yours to hit the Beltway and never return to that sacred
trust we call Our American Government. They are proud of "doing nothing?"
By doing nothing, millions of Americans have been swindled. Tens of thousands
have lost their jobs.
Thousands more have lost their savings and their retirement. Yet your
cabinet secretaries gloat over what a "good job" you and they
did by "doing nothing."
Let me ask you this: If someone was setting a house on fire, and they
called you to help them set it on fire, and you said no you wouldn't help
them -- BUT then you also DIDN'T call 911 and inform the police that someone
was going to burn down a house, do you think you would have committed a
crime?
Of course you would have! You had prior knowledge and then you knowingly
and purposefully HID this information from the authorities and the people
living in the house!
You only admitted that you knew a house was going to be torched when
you were confronted by the police. Are you complicit? Yes! Are you an accessory?
Yes! Who would even think of going around boasting, "Hey, look what
a great guy I am -- a friend of mine told me he was going to commit an act
of arson, and then I decided NOT to tell ANYONE about it!! WHOO-HOO!!"
Enron and Kenny Boy bought your silence and the silence of your cabinet
members. You yourself didn't have to actually raid the 401(k) accounts of
those poor people in Houston (many of whom probably voted for you every
time your name was on a ballot). All you had to do was remain silent, change
the government regulations that let them get away with it, and install their
hand-picked cronies to sit on the "oversight" boards which were
supposed to be keeping an eye on them.
While doing all this, you told the American people that these rich friends
of yours were not getting any special breaks -- when, in fact, Enron had
already scammed their way out of paying NO taxes in four out of the last
five years. Your economic "stimulus" bill that you got the House
to pass after 9-11 had a section that would give Enron a gift of $250 million
of our tax money. You were pushing this bill in November and December, long
after your administration knew that Enron was raiding the vault and screwing
its workers and investors.
You and your Republican friends are quick to point out that Enron had
their claws into the Democrats as well. Yes, they did, and thank you for
making the case why we not only need an alternative to the current make-up
of the Democratic Party, we need private money removed from our electoral
process ASAP.
But, George, let's be real -- the Democrats only got a pittance from
Enron compared to the millions you and the Republicans received. Democrats
just don't have the killer instinct to do anything right, and they certainly
don't know much about making money the old-fashioned way, one off-shore
tax shelter at a time. I would expect nothing less from a Party that couldn't
even put their candidate in the White House after he had already won the
election.
The Democrats are like a Yugo -- you know it won't last long or work
well, but it will occasionally get the job done. Fat cats know they can
buy the Democrats at discount prices, and so they do. Anyone who tries to
deflect this scandal away from you, George, or away from the Republicans,
or away from the whole dirty way we elect our leaders, is someone who is
desperately trying to cling to what's left of a very crooked system that
has to go and go now.
The saddest part of this whole affair was the day the scandal was revealed
-- and you denied that you even knew your good friend, Kenneth Lay. "Ken
who?" you said. Oh, he's just some businessman from Texas. "Heck,
he backed my opponent for governor, Ann Richards!" was your way of
trying to deflect the truth that was hitting you like a Mack truck. You
knew that he, in fact, endorsed YOU and gave you THREE times the money Ann
Richards ever saw from him.
I hardly ever talk to the guy, you said. You were like Peter in the Garden
of Gethsemane, denying he knew Jesus, three times. And then the cock crowed.
And Peter felt shame and ran away.
What shame do you feel tonight, George, for the lies you have told? What
shame do you feel using the dead of 9-11 as a cover for your actions, hoping
that our sorrow for those lost souls and our fear of being killed by terrorists
would distract us from what your boys and Kenny Boy were up to during those
horrific weeks in September and October?
It was during those very days, while the rest of us were in shock and
sadness, that the executives at Enron were selling off their stock and shifting
assets to their 900 phony partnerships overseas. Did they notice the remains
of the dead being pulled from the rubble while they were downloading their
millions, or were their eyes glued only to the bottom third of the TV screen
as the stock ticker with the rigged Enron price crawled across the images
of firemen desperate, in tears, to find their fallen brothers?
The country was behind you when you said you were fighting the evildoers
who did this. In fact, all the while, the real fight your friends at Enron
were conducting was the fight against the clock, to see how fast they could
transfer all the loot to their personal accounts and run away. Those were
the evildoers, George, and you knew it. And because you, by design or negligence,
allowed this to happen, it is time for you to resign. The cock has crowed
for the last time.
At the very least, your mother-in-law deserves better.
Yours,
Michael Moore
American
Son-in-Law
Owner of 7th LARGEST COMPANY IN AMERICA! (revised ranking)
mmflint@aol.com
//www.michaelmoore.com
Funny stuff, interesting stuff, important stuff, stupid stuff, all
sorts of stuff... Hundreds of daily tidbits were featured in The Iranian
Times. They will be gradually archived here. Have you got something for
this page? Email us
|