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Thursday
June 14, 2001

It's embarrassing, really

On Sunday June 10th the news began filtering through the default valve of information of the internet. Princess Leila Pahlavi, 31, had died in a Hotel room in London. I admit, I was saddened at the loss of yet another innocent Iranian.

An almost panic took hold as friend upon friend relayed what they knew and the phone and human conversation overtook the speed of the net as we began to talk about it. Had she died of Anorexia? Or, had she been murdered by the regime? The rumors flew.

It took 2 days for the news to settle down and for the London Times to report the cause of death as an overdose of pills. Almost simultaneously we began to read the press releases from Farah and Reza who each chimed in (on cue) with their most sorrowful of announcements sounding all too familiar like the royal proclamations of the good old days.

Leila, as it turned out was chronically depressed over the loss of her father, the loss of her family's position as (albeit temporary) rulers of Iran, and was unable to understand the reasoning behind the hatred that the people bore for her father and family.

At almost the same time a recent college graduate closed her books for the last time, checked out of the dorm, threw her bags into her friend's car for the quick hop from San Francisco home to a proudly waiting Maman and Baba Joon in San Diego. On the way they (it's not important how) lost control of their car and were both lost. Just like that.

We won't read about this Iranian princess. In respect I won't even name her for you. Why should I? To us she clearly didn't seem to matter as much as Leila did. Isn't this wrong? Didn't she matter more? After all, she had a life ahead of her, a direction, a point, a plan, a contribution to make.

Leila, with everything, felt as though she had nothing. Spoiled by the meaninglessness of a $6,000 a week hotel suite she was staying in when she took her life, she floundered from cocktail party to ball looking wistfully back to the days when at age 9 she had her own apartment and ... Indeed her brother informed us regally of Leila's "long illness". Her mother even asked us to send money instead of flowers to a children's charity. Excuse me?

Farah, you've just lost your daughter! We remember the TV with you chasing her around the Palace as she used to hide from you, you called to her happily, "Leila? Leila? Kojai?" and we loved you when you did that and we want to love you now, but you make it so hard. If people want to send flowers, they want to send flowers, they don't want to send something so dirty and disrespectful as money.

By the way, it would seem $6,000 a week could have bought an awful lot of charity. However, given it is the people's money to begin with, I would expect the Pahlavis to lay low (as they have) or else they could pay some (if not all) of it back.

Leila, with everything, chose nothing. Her family abandoned her when she needed them most. She was an innocent, no doubt. But, no more innocent than our other Princess from San Diego.

While it is important to mourn the passing of each and every one of our own, and we mourn the passing of these two innocents, however it is more important to acknowledge truth, reconcile and move on better for the knowing.

The truth is the Pahlavis are no more important than any other Iranian no matter how much money they have and how nobly the pose. Actually one could argue that with the power they are squandering, the Pahlavis are actually worth less than the average Iranian, because they have done nothing with their power except to indulge as the never before.

To reconcile, we must accept and understand everyone's flawed human nature. That no matter what position you think you have, that we are all simply human, with all the weaknesses and rough edges given to us. It's not like in the movies. Good guys don't always win.

To move on, we must take charge and stock of everything during times like this and ask ourselves, "Are we doing all right? Firstly by our families and loved ones (they matter the most), and secondly, "What are we doing to make our world a better place?"

As Iranians we can all do better than we have. It's embarrassing really, when you think about it.

Omid Ashraf

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