Baghdad goodbye party
Essentials celebrate the end of Saddam
By Sharif N. Mafi
January 27, 2003
The Iranian
So here it is in a nutshell ladies and gentlemen; after twenty some odd years
of brutal reign of terror, two wars, one attempt at ethnic cleansing, a few scuds
fired here and there at civilian populations, extensive usage of chemical weapons
against civilians, and a small number of love-hate relationships with an assortment
of Western and Arab leaders, we are witnessing the last days of Saddam Hussein al
Majd al Takriti.
For this momentous occasion, this unassuming writer suggests a party, a terrific
bash to celebrate the end of Saddam. Prerequisites for this charming get-together
are:
1) Plenty of imported Russian Stolichnaya vodka.
Where do you think the word Scud is from?
2) Président de la République; Jacques Chirac and a few tins of French
Foie Gras to go along with French Exocet missiles and French Mirage fighters that
were provided to Mr. Takriti for free.
3) Loads of American Velveta Cheese Dip and Donald Rumsfeld's himself so that we
can all hear his nostalgic memories of the cuddly U.S-Iraq ties back in the 80's.
Perhaps we could all go over those melancholy satellite photos of Iranian troop movements
they both shared.
4) Lots of German Bratwurst Sausages in honor of all the chemical ingredients provided
by German companies on credit to Arabize the Kurds.
5) Tons of grade A Saudi Arabian dates. After all, the Saudis were bankrolling some
crafty character before Mullah Omar showed up.
6) Arafat in person. Why Not? He sure can light up any party these days, and certainly
can use a break from his two room incarceration in Ramallah.
7) The deceased King Hussain of Jordan. We surely will miss his brotherly-love stories
with Saddam. Perhaps we could instead invite his son, King Abdullah?
8) Someone from the Swiss Federal Banking Commission. And you thought Saddam keeps
his money in Baghdad?
9) Iranians, Israelis and Syrians are not invited.
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