March 29, 2003
The Iranian
Part 7
6 am
BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANGGGG! That was the sound every time Negin MIKOOBOOND ROO KALAYE
Omid to wake him up.
"Vayyyy Negin cheraa injoori mikoni? Are you crazy?"
Omid was really getting angry. From the looks of it, Negin wanted to sleep next
to us. To be more accurate, she didn't want to sleep, she wanted to talk. It looked
like she was high from an adrenaline shot. She was super hyper and full of energy.
Unfortunately, Omid and I couldn't share her mood. I was dying from exhaustion.
Negin had turned into an alarm clock, which had been thrown against the wall and
now after this difficult experience, had a nervous breakdown and rang after every
2 minutes. Just as we were about to doze off she would start to talk and slap Omid
on his head so he would wake up. Bichaare Omid.
Suddenly she would say: "Let's go to my place!"
"Negin khol shodi? A drive to your house is 2 and a half hours. Sonya is
asleep in the next room. Don't you think it would be rude? She would wake up in the
morning and see we've gone without saying goodbye!"
"Akhe Awi, man injaa khaabam nemibare. I can really sleep only in my own
bed!
"Be hagh-e chizaaye nashnide! Khaffesho, BETAMARG. Go to sleep!"
"Cheraa asabaani mishi? Oh I'm sorry, beram too otaaghe Sonya, then you guys
can have some sex!"
Omid and I: "KHAFFESHOOOOO! AJABAA!"
2 minutes later: BAAAAAAANG!
Omid: "AAKHHHHH baba nakon. Cheraa mizanee?"
"Mage man be to nagoftam doost dokhtareto hug kon!!? She's only here for
a week!"
Omid e bichaare would turn around and hug me.
30 seconds... BAAAAAAAANG. "Take your hands off Awi, martike. Gheyrati shodam.
She's my baby sister."
Omid: "Negin toro khodaa nazan roo kalam."
I said: "Negin gonaah daare, velesh kon."
Negin: "You guys are sooo boring! Awi you're just here for a week. We must
all stay awake for at least 3 days!"
"Divoone, begir bekhaab. Too bad I love you a lot, or else I would be hitting
you."
"AREEEEEH? I love youuu tooo Awi joonam, KHEYLIIIIIIIIIIII. Omid didi? Awi
mano doost daare, toro doost nadaareh."
"Negin, please let Omid sleep. Talk to me, I'm awake now."
"Awi, didi Nahal o? My god, the way she looked? All that babyfat every where.
And then she goes around telling everybody Negin's ugly! As if!."
"You know my mom always said, people look the way they deserve to look. But
I don't always agree with her. Some really bitchy people are gorgeous"
"Raast mige mamanet Awi, like Nahal is so ugly, but she thinks she's all
that. What if she WAS really beautiful? Her attitude would have been even worse."
"Damn my throat is so sore. I sang too loudly with the music. In Sonya aab
nadaareh?"
BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG! "OMID PAASHO. ZANET TESHNASHE! Your wife wants
some water and while you're there, bring me some 7-Up."
I wanted to get up, but Negin threw herself on me and started banging on Omid's
head.
"Negin nakon divoone! Khaaaaabeh!"
"Ghalat mikone khaaabe. Wake up TAMBAL KHAN!"
She woke up Omid e bichaararo. He got us some water and we tried to sleep.
2 minutes later.
"KHEYLI BADEEN; KHEYLI BISHOOREEN? I WANT ABBAAAAASSS!"
SPLASHHHHHHHHHH! Omid threw all the water left in my glass on Negin and said,"QUIET!
Basseh digeh!"
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE KHISSS SHODAM!"
"JAHANAM!"
"I can't sleep here anymore!"
Negin got up and slept on the couch. Finally I could close my eyes.
After a few minutes Omid's snoring began. It was as if a wounded bear had crawled
in the corner of the living room. My dad's snoring is so loud that the house next
door has been bought and sold more than 50 times in the last 5 years! The poor people
from the real estate agency are puzzled by the fact that this beautiful house in
Amsterdam can never hold a buyer! So fortunately for me, the sound of Omid's snoring
didn't bother me at all.
Negin: "VAAYYYY in cheraa KHORNAAS mikeshe? I can't sleep like this!"
BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG!
Omid: "Negin bekhodaa paa mishamaa!"
After that I didn't hear anything. I fell in a coma-like sleep.
TO BE CONTINUED
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