It hurt and it pained
By Ali Khalili
March 25, 2002
The winter was long gone. It was a hot summer day with the scorching sun burning
my skin and the wide open blue skies, making me feel like I was in heaven.
Out here in the Canadian prairies, I was doing my usual run through the trees and
grasses in a beautiful valley, up and down the hills. Huffing and puffing, I slowed
down right by a hill facing downtown, mesmerized by all the noise that a few birds
were making. Having no more energy to go on, I stopped and watched.
I always enjoy watching birds. Their free frenzy in the sky is always an awesome
sight for me. But I also like them, because in a way they always remind me of us,
humans. They travel together for miles, seem to spend countless happy hours together
and suddenly, depart and go on their own way, under sometimes very odd circumstances.
As I stood there gazing in the skies, I saw two birds flying in their own separate
pack. They both looked a cross between the birds you see in Canada and those you
see in Iran. They flew together for a while, one seemingly a bit hesitant while
the other seemed full of energy and more determined.
Every once in a while, the more energetic of the two
would fly away with another bird and then, on some ocassions, it would return.
On every return, they would circle up and down in utter joy, but on the final
return, after a few minutes, a quarell seemed to had occured. Couldn't understand
the bird language, but the two departed, this time for good.
I followed their paths through the sky, as they broke off and went their different
ways. And as I tried to absorb the whole scenary, I began to think of a girl I
came across some three years ago.
Our encounter was as accidental as how these birds probably came across one another
and our departure, was almost as abrupt as them. These two birds also looked like
us, one hesitant and one confident. My hesitation always had a reason, at least
in my mind. And I wondered if the little bird out there was just like me, having
my kind of thoughts in his mind.
And like the two birds, we did decide to march on our own way from the early go.
I got to watch her, running into other people in her life. Yet , through thick and
thin, we kept in touch and spent countless hours, talking and chatting. All along,
I felt I was a good mate, being a loyal friend, a commited one and a good flying
mate. All along, I felt that if I would stand by her through all the events of her
life, she would appreciate that...
But one day, after two years, when we got to be together again and to fly again,
in our own human ways, something happened. We started off with smiles, but suddenly
something I never figured out came about and we departed. I was left in awe and
I am sure, so was she, but I could not understand her.
She said that our friendship was based on fraud..She said that the person that
stood by her whenever he could, was not a true friend. It hurt and it pained, but
I had see to her fly away, although I had no idea why.
The winds began to pick up and I could feel the chill as all the sweats on my forehead
had dried up by now. I began running towards my destination, wondering what these
birds were thinking now, as they were flying away. And I wondered if there really
were a God out there watching us, what would he be thinking when he oversees us
marching away in this crazy life.