Wednesday
May 9, 2001
* Not your site any more
What a well written letter -- polite, sincere and making such good sense,
didn't you think? (Sina's "Who
are we kidding") I, too, am proud of your site. A serious and
yet fun site with "mohtavaa". What a concept.
But, every once in while (you knew a "but" was coming, didn't
you?) you rattle my pride ever so slightly. The seezdeh-bedar joke ["Not
without my mom"] was one of those times. "Bahram"
and "Karin"
may be small examples of that. Let me tell you why I said "may be".
I read both "Bahram" and "Karin". I enjoyed reading
them. The stories didn't bother me. But blushing at work because I didn't
expect to find them in your site at 10 in the morning did. (some of us don't
work alone : )
Also, after reading Sina's letter I realized that once my kids are old
enough to read, I may not like for them to learn about throbbing nether
regions from mommy's cultural daily newsletter.
You know what? We demand a certain standard and caliber from you. You
know why? Because this is not just your site anymore! You have gone beyond
"one man and his site". Iranian.com is now mine too. Forgive me
for this claim. It's not my fault that I have come to respect and expect
so much from your site. And and I think I am speaking for a lot of us out
there.
Mehrnaz
* Surprised and impressed
As I read "Bahram",
I was surprised and impressed that an Iranian woman would bear her most
intimate feelings. The letters that have followed from Iranian women reinforced
my impressions. They're human too, they just like to put on this facade.
I thank the writer, Nooneh, for taking me a long way back to believing
that Iranian women are warm, caring, affectionate and erotic. The reponses
to her article just tell me that they have a cold hard shell that for some
reason, they think, needs to be ever present.
I just hope that the article is not indicative of the way typical Iranian
men behave. I find it amazing that no one has commented on Bahram's behavior.
Did we get engrossed in Nooneh's sexual experience, and forget that there
is another person in this story?
Thanks to The Iranian for having the openness to print such a
well-written piece.
Cyrus Shargh
* Away from the crotch
Look, is EVERYBODY who reads The Iranian supposed to be love-sick and
sexually frustrated? Could we PLEASE have something other than articles
by a bunch of torshideh writers about their pathetic "romantic"
lives? What is this, Days of Our Lives? Please, let's get away from the
crotch and have some substance.
John Mohammadi
* Iranian Anais Nin
I do not have much time these days to read anything other than monographs
and documents pretaining to my rather esoteric research. But as usual
the outraged comments in the letters section made me turn to "Bahram".
I was thoroughly impressed and delighted by the ease and flow of what
must be our own Iranian Anais Nin. Or maybe it is more like Sally Jessica
Parker in "Sex in the City".
It is not easy to write pornography that is so convincing and still not
very vulgar. Beside the ease of the eroticism of the story, it was also
very funny. Well done.
One thing though "To catch a Thief" was set in the French
Riviera and not Italy. And for the life of me I cannot remember the title
of the second movie and I am going to spend the good part of the week trying
to remember it. If someone knows it can you let me know.
S. Sabety
* Like eating, sleeping
Contrary to the other readers who found the story "Bahram"
distasteful, I found it very amuzing and interesting to read. Sexuality
is a natural aspect of human life, just like eating and sleeping. The only
reason that sexuality has become a private and taboo subject in human societies,
is that mating and reproduction has become tied in with property ownership.
I would guess that this happened when humans settled down and became
farmers, instead of nomads. So, who you mate with, and who your children
are, are tied in with what you own, and how much power you have. Other than
that, there is no rational and logical reason why sexuality should be a
taboo subject, while eating and sleeping are not, when both are equally
natural aspects of our lives.
The people who find sex offensive, and talking about it "shameful",
need to get over their backward and restricted mentality, and frankly, get
over themselves. The only result of denying and suffocating expressions
of sexuality -- contrary to what these people might think -- are further
reckless sexual behavior, particularly by the young.
HamMihan
* Place to practice tolerance
I have been following up on all the debates concerning the feature article
["Bahram"].
I strongly believe any publication should stick with a set of guidelines,
or red lines if you will. However, this forum is a great place to practice
tolerance. If we ever believe in democratic sociey, we would need to believe
the concept of tolerance and accepting assorted life styles - the true fact
that democratic societies have prospered so far.
Armin
P.S. I personally liked the story.
* REAL, intelligent
I loved this story ["Bahram"].
The woman who wrote this story IS not only REAL but is also candid, charismatic,
and intelligent. I'm sorry that there are people out there who are so uptight
that they cannot see that human behavior is boundless, normal, and global.
I love this website for its diversity. Don't change. Please!
Karin
* America's success credited to immigrants
For someone who advocates an open mind, your article exhibited some of
the most pretentious and narrow-minded preachings I have ever heard ["Embrace"].
As I read on and on, all I saw was an increasing number of generalizations
that revealed how skewed your perspective of the world is and how blind
you really are.
You do not understand that someone's culture is the root of his or her
identity that provides a strong foundation that develops the very character
that builds a strong and prosperous society. One of the major problems
in America is that there is no concrete, defined identity because relative
to other nations, the United States is very young and has very weak roots.
There are so many ways that these cultures have helped this country
and much of America's success is credited to these immigrants. I'm not
going to go into how very wrong all of your specific accusations of certain
things in our culture were (for instance, our food is healthier than traditional
American food and, heart disease being one of the most imminent problems
in this country, more and more people have turned to Asian and Middle Eastern
foods for healthier meals and life styles). I think I've repeated enough
times how throwing away ones roots and very identity is showing the greatest
disrespect and hatred for oneself.
As a seventeen-year-old that came to this country at a very young age
I am proud to tell you sir that I am indeed still an Iranian and will always
proclaim myself as one with the utmost pride >>>
FULL TEXT
Mitra Yousefi
* What the hell is American culture?
To be quite honest it is not worth mine or anybody else's time to criticize
what has been said in this article ["Embrace"].
When one's total (lack of) understanding of the Iranian culture is "What
the hell is Iranian culture? Baba Karam? Snapping fingers and making loud
noises? Fat guys with thick mustaches shouting "Assghar aaghaa! Biyaa
beraqs deegeh"? Old women with nose jobs? Over-priced Chanel handbags?
The ability to crush another person's feelings with total aplomb? Driving
a BMW? Eating ghormeh sabzi and chelo kabab until you die of a heart attack?"
what else can I add?
I don't think it is fair or right for me to say, What the hell is American
culture? Disco? Burgers? Dancing? Doing drugs? Fat ladies with HUGE lardy
butts drinking diet coke with a burger (and fries)? Young skinny girls with
nose jobs? Over-priced designer clothes? Eating burger, burger and burger
till they die of heart attack? I THINK NOT?
I suppose what I am trying to say to the writer is please go read, investigate,
understand a culture before writing about it.
Majid
* CANNOT forget?
Freddie Mercury's parents were from India and not Iran ["Embrace"].
Surly you should have researched a bit better. However, your points are
well taken. It is very sad that you want Iranians to forget about their
heritage! Embrace the country you live in but why forget about where you
are from? Making fun of any culture will only upset the people of that
culture. If that was your intention, you achieved it.
H. Fard
An Iranian who have lived outside Iran for 23 years and is very proud of
being Iranian and CANNOT forget it
* Be (better) Iranian
Yariz Kangani talks about some very important issues in "Embrace".
I agree with a lot of the things said. There are things in our culture
and our everyday life we shouldn't particularly be proved of. There are
lots of feelings and beliefs that prevent us from breaking away from what
we are and adapt to new ways.
Reasons for that, I think, are
(1) We are too proud of ourselves, and for the most part for no reason.
(2) We are too proud of our past history, which for the most part is
great, but it's in the past. The question is what have you done for me
lately? What have we accomplished for ourselves or what have we contributed
to the world in the past couple of centuries?
(3) We are very good at blaming others for our situation and often expecting
the very same people we blame, to fix things for us.
(4) We're just too lazy. We're too comfortable with what is. We don't
change thins around us. We wait for changes to happen.
Having said all that, I disagree with the notion that "If you live
in the United States, then you are American." I don't think we need
to "act American." Look at, as examples, Italian-American or
Latino-American minorities in the U.S.. They have contributed to this society
in so many ways and "embraced" it with open arms, while "embracing"
their own culture and heritage.
I believe we need to make a lot of changes for the better, and it must
start with our own families and ourselves. We need a better understanding
of our culture and work constantly to improve it. We should stay Iranian,
feel Iranian and be (a better) Iranian.
Ray Irani
* Culture of HOPE
I just read "Embrace".
firstly I must say that I agree on many points with the writer but I can
not understand his conclusion. Yes, he is right we must try to understand
the world and think differently about it. We must master foreign languages,
especially languages of nations we live with them now.
But CAN WE FORGET THAT WE ARE IRANIAN? the writer mentioned Napoleon
as an example. Did he forget his Italian heritage? All historians agree
that he was fond of Italians and Italian culture, and his rule in Italy
was accompanied by more understanding than any other country in Europe,
invaded by his army.
Writer also mention General Marshal and General Schwarzkopf. Both are
among the finest leaders the U.S. has ever had. But did they forget that
they are American when they had been living in Iran or China? They learnt
about that nation, and used that information and those skills later.
So we must learn, but we shouldn't forget. And by the way, WHAT IS IRANIAN
CULTURE? I really consider that question an insulting. Iran has a culture
and a very good one. It is the culture of HOPE. Let's learn about it too.
We can not deny our personalities, we must learn about the world to improve
it.
Ali Dadpay
Ph.D student
* Not surprised
I think Yariz Kangani ["Embrace"]
should take he own advice and learn about the culture she is commenting
on. She probably knows less about Iranian culture than "the Schwarzkopfs"
who, according to her lived in Iran only for four years.
If to her Iranian culture is synonymous only with Baba Karam, ghormeh
sabzi and Fat Guys (Fat guys?! Is she blind to the fact that obesity is
a big problem of her beloved culture and cuntry, the USA? And so is heart
problems?) I am not surprised she does not wish to have anything to do with
it. But I assure you, there is more to being an Iranian, a lot more! But
I don't think she wants to find out.
Siamak
* Bahais care about their Persian identity
Jim Entessari ["Not
Persians"] has chosen a very narrow interpretation of my comments;
his view that the quotaions are a contradiction only prove his superficial
understanding of the Bahai ideals. Does love and respect for of one's neighbors
and community mean one does not have family identity or simply one does
not care for ones own home (Iran)? Bahai simply believe that in order to
bring peace and tranquility to the world , we must see humanity as one family
and become united despite all the diversity. I think our forced flight from
our homeland and experience as Iranians scattered throughout the world enable
us a better understanding of this concept as we have become Iranian-Americans,
Iranian-swedes etc.
To understand this, I think one only has to look upon not just the words
uttered in praise of Iran but the actions and sacrificial deeds of Iranian
Bahais who continue to dedicate their lives and in some cases give their
lives in the path of service for humanity. To the Western eye and writers
they were better known as Persian and they have been judged and credited
according to their deeds and actions. Perhaps the most well known of these
Persian Bahais and the most written about was Abdul-Baha (1844-1921) who
traveled to the West in 1912 >>>
FULL TEXT
Faryar Mansuri
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