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Our greatest concern

December 6, 2004

The brain drain and the revolution culminating in
Ali Reza's over-priced Porsche
his shit-talking girlfriend
and his homophobic little brother.
an entire culture caught uttering racial slurs
inside the junior high boy's bathroom,
stuck together like the velcro in a fake Prada wallet,
good thing our greatest concern is the naming of a body of water.
a tight-lipped family with Mercedes dreams,
metrosexual before metrosexual was cool.
fantasizing about the white man's liberation:
do us like you did Iraq,
just don't bomb the shopping malls in Tehran.
Persians at UCLA, sons and daughters of the Holocaust
scamming handicapped parking stickers
and unapologetically cheating on every exam,
good thing our greatest concern
is the naming of a body of water.
Our husbands caught inside Tijuana brothels,
our daughters, acting dumber than bubble gum,
but majoring in Organic Chemistry and Computer Science,
flipping hair instead of speaking minds,
good thing our greatest concern is the naming of a body of water.
Longing for remembrance of a mythical Persia.
The Paris of the Middle East!
These scissors were used to groom the Shah's cat
and we are never washing them again.
How did our dreams become channeled into misery?
How did we become
a shit-talking and shit-talking and shit-talking culture?
Niloufar found the cure for Cancer and bought her first home
(Too bad she has a big ass.)
Maryam married Babak and they are in love,
(But did you see how ugly their baby is?)
Is there a special place in hell reserved for Iranians?
(Good thing we are all actually Italians.)
Good thing we are
so concerned
a body of water.

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Book of the day

Borrowed Ware
Medieval Persian Epigrams
Translated by Dick Davis

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