You call this a war?
I wanna see some Iraqi fedayins' guts shoot at the camera and cover Christiane Amonpor's face

April 14, 2003
The Iranian

Nothing is more entertaining than watching bunch of grownups argue about war. You know, the whole pro/anti war thing. The way I see it, if you are sitting comfortably in an air-conditioned building, sipping on your Starbucks cappuccino, you have no right to express any opinion about war. Only people who have been there, done that and lived to tell about it may apply.

I see anti/pro war demonstrations all over the globe. But what about people like me who just don't give two hoots about this war? What about us? Why don't we all get together and have a carnival. You know ? Mardi Gras style demonstrations of people who just don't care.

We can carry signs that say, "Stop the stupid war coverage and show Bay Watch reruns" or "war for oil is not good for your cholesterol."

Now, I'm sick and tired of CNN's war coverage. I just don't get any satisfaction of continuously watching tanks and armored vehicles drive up and down the dunes and desert roads of Iraq; or stupid jet fighters flying off aircraft carriers. What's that all about? Can we see some bullets flying, hand-in-had combat, heads smashing, organs flying out of bodies and legs blowing up everywhere for a change. You call this a war?

As a taxpaying viewer I demand to see reality TV. I wanna see some Iraqi fedayins' guts shoot at the camera and cover Christiane Amonpor's face while she's reporting live from Baghdad. I wanna see a journalist dive into plume of mustered gas just to show its effects on the human body. I wanna see, an Iraqi Republican Guard piss his pants when a 2000-ton bomb hits 5-feet away from him. I wanna see an American soldier say to the camera, "Holy shit, what the fuck did I get myself into?"

Maybe then people would realize the reality of war and keep their stupid opinions to themselves. I hate war coverage by network television. It's just plain boring.

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