Faramarz
به زبان فارسی
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An Iranian Sex Sandwich
22-Dec-2010
I had just been back in Tehran after spending my freshman year in the US and had nothing else to do but visiting friends and relatives and go here and there, when my high school friend Jamal called and asked if I wanted to go to Taj Tennis Club in northern Tehran. He wanted to play some tennis and also introduce me to his American “girlfriend” Kathy!
I was not much of a tennis player so I asked him to bring his extra Slazenger racquet and Fred Perry outfit so that I could get on the court. Jamal was a good tennis player and a member of the Club. When we got there, Kathy, an eighteen-year-old American girl whose father was working in Iran was waiting for us.
“This is Kasi. I am teaching her how to play tennis.” Jamal said with a boyish laughter.
“My name is Kathy, you Silly Savage! Kathy, not Kasi. When are you going to learn English?” She had a nickname for Jamal, Silly Savage that actually fit his character quite well!
It turned out that Jamal had met her in the Club a few weeks earlier and was teaching her tennis. Kathy, more than anything, was amused by Jamal’s simplicity and good nature, but there was nothing else going on there. After a little bit of chit-chat about my college town in the US, I could tell that Kathy was getting interested in me. The three of us played some tennis and then sat in the Cafeteria drinking Tang (powdered) orange juice and Café Glacé, as was customary by the snobs and the spoiled kids of northern Tehran!
Jamal didn’t speak much English so he tried to overcompensate by constantly laughing and joking and the physical touch. He reminded me of myself of about a year ago, completely clueless about the ways of the women and the world! One thing that I had learned dating women in the US was that a man can be hot, aggressive, funny or smart, but at the end of the day, it is the woman who makes the final decision!
After tennis, we decided to go to Chattanooga for lunch. We had a couple of Tuborg beers and Beef Stroganoff for lunch and then as I was trying to figure out the next move, Kathy suggested that we go to her house for a swim. She said that her family lived in a large, rented house nearby. We didn’t have our bathing suits with us and Jamal didn’t want to ruin his expensive tennis shorts so Kathy offered her brother’s cut-off jeans, and we got on our way to her house.
When we got there, we opened the large metal double door and parked the car on the gravel near the front stairs. There was nobody home. We put on her brother’s cut-off jeans and jumped into the pool, not knowing what to expect next. A few minutes later she showed up in a nice bikini that highlighted her attractive figure.
As we were splashing and horse-playing in the pool, we heard a loud roar coming from somewhere in the neighborhood. Jamal and I looked at each other wondering what that was all about! She just laughed and told us that it was the roar of the lion from the nearby Tehran Zoo! I guess that we were so preoccupied with other evil thoughts that we did not notice that she lived a few of blocks from the zoo. I think that the hungry lion was calling for his afternoon snack!
We took the cue from the hungry lion and told her that we were the real Persian lions in this neighborhood and started roaring and clawing her! As we were getting more and more playful, Jamal went under the water, put his head between her legs and lifted her out of the water on his shoulders! She started screaming and hitting Jamal on the head! Jamal just threw her back into the water!
When she resurfaced and stood up again, her bikini top had gone missing and was floating nearby and a pair of beautiful, champagne-glass-size breasts were staring deeply into our eyes and burning our souls!
Jamal, was uncharacteristically silent. I knew for sure that he hadn’t seen anything like this before. Actually, I don’t think that he had ever been that close to a beautiful and naked woman. I was quiet too and I couldn’t hear the hungry lion roaring either! She quickly broke the silence and whispered quietly, “I want my jeans back, now!” I knew that I was good to go! I gave her my cut-off jeans and told Jamal to do the same. He quickly did it like a good and polite kid! She threw them out of the pool as far away as she could! We didn’t care! We were then drawn to her like a magnet, me in the front and Jamal in the back!
“This is a called a Persian Sandwich! Have you ever had a Gol o Bolbol ice cream? The one that they put the ice cream in between two wafers!” I said with a smile.
“Just shut up and kiss me! I know what Bastani is! ……. Silly Savage, what are you doing back there? I am not that kind of a girl!” She said playfully.
It was a confusing situation and at times Jamal’s hairy arm would get in my way! I don’t know what he was up to, but we sure were having fun! Jamal didn’t last for too long and with a loud moan, he was done for the day!
یک، دو، سه، بینهایت! جمال فوری داماد شد
He moved away and floated on his back in the pool while things heated up between Kathy and me. With her arms tightly around my neck I started looking around the big yard to distract myself and prolong the pleasure. As my eyes were roving from one fruit tree to another and past a small brick room at the end of the yard, all of sudden my eyes locked on to a motionless older man squatting in the shades of the grapevines, watching us. It was such a piercing gaze that my heart almost sank. I pretended that I did not see him and quickly looked the other way. I knew that I had to wrap up the matter-at-hand with Kathy as quickly as possible and get out of there!
Shortly after, as she caught her breath and loosened her grip around my neck and shoulders I told her about the man under the grapevines.
“He is the gardener. He lives with his wife in that small room at the far end of the yard. We caught him watching us another time and told the owner of the house. But he didn’t want to get rid of him. The guy has been a gardener here for ages. Anyways, my dad’s assignment is almost over and we are moving back to the States by the end of summer.”
I quietly told Jamal about the guy. He looked at him from the corner of his eyes and was alarmed. “We should get out of the pool as quickly as possible before the guy comes after us with a shovel. I don’t want my naked ass to be fed to that hungry lion!”
By then Kathy had her bikini on and was going inside. As soon as she was out of sight, Jamal and I quickly jumped out of the pool and with one hand covering our fronts and the other covering our naked butts ran towards the house!
A while later, her mother and brother came home and parked next to my car. We kissed Kathy goodbye, said hi to them, pulled the car out of the driveway and left. On the way back home, we played Jamal’s favorite tape, “It’s Five O’clock” by Demis Roussos and laughed about our encounter.
A week later, I was on my Iran Air flight back to the US thinking and smiling about my short summer trip, the roar of the lion, the piercing gaze of the gardener and the floating bikini top!
As I look back on that summer vacation, I can’t help but wonder that perhaps today, somewhere in the Midwest, there is a suburban blond mom sitting in her kitchen and with a twinkle in her eyes, telling her family while watching Ahmadinejad on TV, “Trust me, Iranians are fun people. When I was 18, I spent a wonderful year over there!”
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Faramarz
by Doctor mohandes on Thu Dec 30, 2010 09:12 PM PSTKojayi pas Haji?
Going LP again?:)
Our hearts are getting Tightened for you!
Faramarz
by Doctor mohandes on Fri Dec 24, 2010 04:54 PM PSTAt least tell me which part was it that reecceeeveed urr keeeesss Mr. Genteelllmaaaann...
Shabe Keereesmase. 'tis the time to tell (after doing the keeseeeng).
May papa Noel, amoo noel or HAji feerooz comes through your chimney and bring you kathy tonight:)
Divaneh Jaan & Friends
by Faramarz on Fri Dec 24, 2010 11:24 AM PSTDivaneh Jaan,
A hot dog sandwich is a lot better than a Kalbas sandwich, as I learned! You don't have to push the hairy arm out of the way!
But to answer your question, we were more concerned about protecting our own Kalbas from the gardener than having time to do a Q/A!
Doctor Mohandes,
A gentleman never kisses and tells!
Parthian,
We all missed out on the 60's. Now, those guys have stories to tell!
If they can still remember them!
California dreamin
by Parthianshot91 on Fri Dec 24, 2010 08:50 AM PSTYour story also reminded me of this song.
//www.youtube.com/watch?v=evzqQn5tVb8
------------------------------------------
"They are not afraid of the ideology alone, but of the detemination and will of the men behind it"
Faramarze Aslani:)
by Doctor mohandes on Thu Dec 23, 2010 07:07 PM PSTYou tube Bekhorde mA nadeh DadasH:))
I vvaant to heeeer eeet frooom uuurr own Tuuunggg...
Evereeee deeetailllll:))))))))))))
قربون کالباسش
divanehThu Dec 23, 2010 05:58 PM PST
Sweet memories dear Faramarz. I now will be thinking of you, Jamal and Kathy every time that I visit a sandwich shop. Did you ask her which gherkin she liked better?
Doctor Mohandes Jaan
by Faramarz on Thu Dec 23, 2010 05:00 PM PSTSince you are in the medical field, this is what I mean by "Things Heating Up..."
//www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9SmGLjyX2Y&feature...
When you say
by Doctor mohandes on Thu Dec 23, 2010 04:20 PM PSTThings kinda heated up with the two of you... What exactly do you mean?
:)))))
"Needle out of hay stack"?
by Shazde Asdola Mirza on Thu Dec 23, 2010 04:00 PM PSTJamal's was so thiny? Poor thing ;-)
Shazde Jaan, Welcome back!
by Faramarz on Thu Dec 23, 2010 03:56 PM PSTThis place isn't the same without you!
You have a way of picking the needle out of the hay stack (Jamal's Hairy Arm!)
"confusing situation; at times Jamal’s hairy arm got in the way"
by Shazde Asdola Mirza on Thu Dec 23, 2010 03:25 PM PSTSo lucky that it was his arm ;-)
IranJon All I can Say is
by fullback1 on Wed Dec 22, 2010 09:16 PM PSTIranJon
All I can Say is Good Times
If you check this with Niloufar Parsi
by bushtheliberator on Wed Dec 22, 2010 06:56 PM PSTyou shouldn't be surprised to hear that visiting big-breasted American girls have been implanted with C-4,and cluster bombs targeting Iran's innocent women & children. Your life may have been spared only because you are obviously NOT innocent.
Dear Friends
by Faramarz on Wed Dec 22, 2010 04:54 PM PSTMehman Aziz,
There was nothing soft or delicate about this whole episode!
Thanks for your comments buddy.
Red Wine Jaan,
I am glad that you guys were forced to go to Taj Club and endure those beautiful girls in mini skirts!
Despite your love and affection for the Merengues, Barca is just too good!
Ari Khan,
At the end of day, the most precious thing that was on the line was our Iranian reputation! And as you have clearly noticed, we did our best to safeguard that!
Thanks for reading.
Engaging storytelling
by Ari Siletz on Wed Dec 22, 2010 04:39 PM PST"I can’t help but wonder that perhaps today, somewhere in the Midwest, there is a suburban blond mom sitting in her kitchen..."
Very nice touch!
My adorable Mouse
by Rea on Wed Dec 22, 2010 04:07 PM PSTGo figure ;o)
//www.youtube.com/watch?v=GkHNNPM7pJA
رئال مادرید
Red WineWed Dec 22, 2010 03:23 PM PST
فرامرز جان،رفتن ما به کلوب اجباری بود.... اما عجب تیکه‌هایی بدانجا میآمدند و تا دلت می‌خواست... مینی ژوب پوش !
همین الان رئال مادرید ۸ بر صفر یک تیم را در جام حذفی شکست داد.
Sweet memory
by Mehman on Wed Dec 22, 2010 02:26 PM PSTof an unexpected soft orgy! delicate and tilting! Tanx Fery.
دوستان بسیار عزیز
FaramarzWed Dec 22, 2010 01:19 PM PST
ZZ Aziz,
I really feel for your situation. Here is why.
The youth of today have already adjusted to the harsh realities of Iran and have learned how to circumvent the Regime and have fun behind the closed doors. But, people in your age group saw how their older brothers and cousins were living their youths, but by the time it was your turn, the whole thing went south. That’s a bummer!
Souri Jann,
Thanks for your comments. You know, that one sentence was the essence of this blog and I am happy that you saw it that way. Although Jamal and I had a great time, but it was all about her and the choices that she made.
Hamsade Jaan,
I think that I have revealed too much already! Please put the shovel down! I am innocent!
Rea Dear,
Your innocent comment is so funny. No cutting in half, it is a package deal!
Maziar Jaan,
I want to read your memoires whenever you have them ready! They will make my stories so innocent and harmless!
cool splash
by maziar 58 on Wed Dec 22, 2010 12:45 PM PSTgood old times.
thanks faramarz khan we all had some or similar tales as yours from then.
But you're the man who can tell it all as is !
I remember going for summer taghviyati to Tehran and my weeks were all booked like a DON JUAN in cancun !
from classes in the morning to the clubs in afternoon and evening and if not going to movies it was ghasre yakh or Bashgah mohandesin for swiming on fridays .
And the only one with driver license I was chauffering 4-5 friends around Tehran . Maziar
Rea "what" did you want cut in half?!
by Anonymouse on Wed Dec 22, 2010 12:38 PM PSTEverything is sacred
Loved it
by Rea on Wed Dec 22, 2010 12:29 PM PSTBut would've loved it twice as much, if cut in half.
Poor me, old woman. ;o)
great story faramarz.
by hamsade ghadimi on Wed Dec 22, 2010 11:54 AM PSTgreat story farmarz. it seems that the theme for that day was tang. you're revealing a bit more with each story. keep 'em coming.
I like this kind of stories
by Souri on Wed Dec 22, 2010 11:38 AM PSTWhich doesn't go too much in details and let a lot to imagine by the readers. Very sweet story, dear Faramarz. From all you said, there's a little phrase which took my attention the best (which has little to do with the content) and I believe it is so true :
"One thing that I had learned dating women in the US was that a man can
be hot, aggressive, funny or smart, but at the end of the day, it is the
woman who makes the final decision!"
Oh yes! You bet!
The good behavior of the people, warms our heart and make us thankful..... And the bad ones, just make us to recognize and appreciate the good ones!
Reminded me of this old Iranian porno movie
by Parthianshot91 on Wed Dec 22, 2010 11:38 AM PSTwhile watching Iranian t.v, on accident I stumbled on a adult Iranian channel, Where these two Iranian dudes were getting it on with this American tourist, of-cource being from the 70's she was all hairy down there, like the Amazon forest.
Anyways, you got a good way of telling a story, really pulls you in.
--------------------------------------------------------------
"They are not afraid of the ideology alone, but of the detemination and will of the men behind it"
Enjoyed reading
by zztop on Wed Dec 22, 2010 11:30 AM PSTyour great piece. I always envied those who came home from abroad for summer vacation. My older brother being one. So, in 1977 when I graduated high school and was on my way to the US by middle of that summer I couldn't wait to return the next summer. I couldn't wait to go back and tell Karen the American girl who happend to be from same city/state I was going to in US. Of course, it never happened. 1978 was the beginning of the end for old Iran and I never saw Karen again.
Manwich!
by Faramarz on Wed Dec 22, 2010 10:52 AM PSTThat's great JJ! A perfect description of our situation!
You know, necessity is the mother of invention!
You will be amazed what you are capable of doing in a tight situation!
Dear Friends
by Faramarz on Wed Dec 22, 2010 10:48 AM PSTMehrban,
Thank you. Somehow, the roar of a hungry lion or the prospect of being chased naked by a shovel-wielding Gheirati gardener sharpens your survival skills!
Arthimis,
Thank you. There is a lot going on in Tehran today, but it is all hidden in the basements. We were lucky that we did not have to hide our simple youthful joys.
Anahid Jaan,
It was Tang or Café Glacé, not mixed together. I was more of carrot juice or melon juice person and didn't care for the foofoo stuff!
Manwich
by Jahanshah Javid on Wed Dec 22, 2010 10:41 AM PSTGreat story Faramarz.
I don't know how you guys did it! I can't imagine myself in a "sandwich" -- certainly not with another man :)))
Faramarz jan, Cafe Glace with Tang, was that really good?
by Anahid Hojjati on Wed Dec 22, 2010 10:35 AM PSTIn junior high, I played Volleyball in school. Truth be told, I was a reserve player. My Volleyball was much worse than my ping-pong. I think even the fact that I was in the team at all was because the team captain and one other great player were my friends. At that time, Taj club had given us uniforms which we (my twin sister and I) never liked to wear the jacket because of the symbol.
Those were the days. Somewhere I have a picture of our Volleyball team, I just have to find it. Another thing, Cafe Glace was the best. But drinking it with Tang, that does not go that well together. Or at least, it does not seem. Didn't Cinema Shahre Ghesse have Cafe Glace. For some reason, I was just reminded of it but I may be wrong. Anyone remember?