Nice nails, mister

Balatarin
Share/Save/Bookmark

Nice nails, mister
by Jahanshah Javid
20-Jan-2011
 

Life's short. You have to experience everything at least once.

No you don't. Guys, you can skip this one: nail polish.

About a year ago I was in Washington, visiting my daughter Mahdiyeh. She had told me that Saman, our mutual friend and her co-worker at VOA (Parazit), had been borrowing her nail polish. For his nails. When we met, I thought they looked really cool. I think they were black at the time. Nothing girly.

A few nights later we got together with some friends at a concert in the basement of some bar. As we were drinking beer at a table in the back, Saman asked Mahdiyeh if she had any nail polish in her purse. She gave it to him and he started doing his nails. I said I want to do my nails too! They didn't hesitate for a second. They had my nails painted in two seconds. Dark blue. Cool!

You know, you reach a certain age (I'll be 49 in March) and you want to try things you never imagined. Or you try things you never dared before, because of what society may think. But you no longer care how others may react, especially if whatever you've decided to do is totally harmless. You do it because you want to. You don't think the consequences would be too bad or unbearable. Just unusual. A man with colored nails would certainly draw attention, but so what? You're comfortable with yourself.

The day after the concert, Mahdiyeh put the finishing touches on her work of art. Uneven orange and blue stripes. My nails really looked like art, kinda Monet-ish or maybe even Van Gogh-ish. I was astonished how cool they looked. I decided to keep them and proudly show them off to everybody. I was spending time with friends and they all laughed it off as temporary insanity. Just having fun.

The first person who commented on my nails, outside my circle of friends, was a ticket lady at the Iceland Air counter at the airport as I was boarding for a flight to London. "Very nice nails!" she said as I handed by ticket. "Oh thank you!" I said with a smile, a little startled. "My daughter painted them."

I arrived in London and the immigration officer, a Muslim woman in full hejab, must have thought I was a freak. Her head was spinning from the answers I was giving her about my job (iranian.com), my country of residence (none), reason for visiting London (haminjoori, maybe work for the BBC). Plus I'm sure she must have noticed my nails. She wasn't too happy or sure about allowing me to enter the UK.

I got on the underground and went to stay a few days with my friends, Hossein and Fatemeh, who are both artists. They didn't ask about my nails and I had gotten so used to them that I forgot to mention anything. After a couple of hours I glanced at my nails and realized I should say something. "What do you think?" I asked as I flaunted my nails. "Mahdiyeh did them. Cool, nah?" What were Hossein and Fatemeh going to say? You've lost your mind? They would never say that. They let it slide. They know I have a few loose screws.

A couple of days later they took me to a birthday party at the home of one of their Iranian friends. I didn't know anyone there and for the first time I started to feel uncomfortable about my fashion statement. My usual excuse that it was my daughter's idea (I'm heterosexual, bekhoda!) did not get much sympathy. Their reaction was like "... baleh... cheh jaaleb..." and what they were really saying was "een koss khol kiyeh digeh?"

I decided to clean my nails for a meeting with a BBC editor. I was looking for a part-time job while in London and didn't want to look too outrageous during the interview. Afterward, I was in no rush to paint my nails again. It was a fun, interesting experience, but I had no intention of making it a permanent part of my look.

Then a couple of months later I was at a pharmacy in Budapest and I saw a rack of nail polish. I was bored and had a lot of idle time. I thought why not experiment with some fresh colors? I bought purple, orange and yellow polish and applied them like parallel lines, similar to what Mahdiyeh had done in Washington.

The next day, I went to the corner store to buy some lighters. I didn't know how to say "four" in Hungarian, so I showed the cashier four fingers and pointed at the lighters for sale. Her eyes were glued on my nails and her head followed my colorful fingers as they flashed in front of her. She was thrown completely off balance. I don't think she'd seen anything like it -- on a man, or woman.

I went back to my apartment and immediately began cleaning my nails. I didn't think it was cool any more. The thrill of doing something experimental had worn off. Thinking about it now, I can't believe I tolerated having painted nails for that long.

So no, you don't have to experience everything. I wonder what I'll do next...

Balatarin
Share/Save/Bookmark

Recently by Jahanshah JavidCommentsDate
Hooman Samani: The Kissinger
4
Aug 31, 2012
Eric Bakhtiari: San Francisco 49er
6
Aug 26, 2012
You can help
16
Aug 23, 2012
more from Jahanshah Javid
 
Latina

body art

by Latina on Sun Jan 23, 2011 04:14 PM PST

When my sons were toddlers, they would use their washable markers to color on my arms and legs. Yep! I was their walking work of art.

Every once in a while, they remember and draw on my upper arms a design or two. I guess children never grow out of it. :o)

Only wish it was washable markers. Permanent markers are tougher to wash off. LOL


  •  
Latina

.............

by Latina on Sun Jan 23, 2011 04:10 PM PST

My thing lately has been wigs. I got tired of frying my poor hair with so many different hairstyles. So, I am gathering a nice little collection of wigs.

:o)

No one knows what look, I will come up with next.


  •  
divaneh

You got me thinking

by divaneh on Fri Jan 21, 2011 04:16 PM PST

I wouldn't mind do it just to see people's reaction. I however have the bad habit of chewing my nails especially when I have to think hard. There seems to be an adverse relation between the length of the nails on my fingers and my brain power. Good on you.

Simorgh:

I heard in Iran it costs a finger joint for each manicured finger.

 


  •  
default

Offensive comment by Faramarz

by Doctor mohandes on Thu Jan 20, 2011 03:37 PM PST

Turn your eyes into a darvish!!!! cheshmato darvish kon deh!!!

Peeleez Belock heeem!!! and Flaagg heeem!


  •  
comrade

خدا شانس بده

comrade
Thu Jan 20, 2011 03:09 PM PST

 

 

نه به اون اعضا اخراج کردن و آواتار اخمو گذاشتنت، نه به این لاک
ناخون زدنت. فقط اسم من، بد در رفته که میگن معلوم نیست کی‌ هستم و چی‌
می‌خوام بگم. مگه ما آدم نبودیم؟ ما هم "مید ایج  کرایسس" داشتیم، ولی دیگه
اینجوری نمی‌کردیم...

Never increase, beyond what is necessary, the number of entities required to explain anything.

 


  •  
Simorgh5555

Jahanshah, are you going

by Simorgh5555 on Thu Jan 20, 2011 02:51 PM PST

Jahanshah, are you going through a mid-life crisis, dude?

Lucky you weren't caught in the airport in Iran with your nails. Reports are circulating that it costs $50 per nail. 


  •  
Esfand Aashena

I guess the moral of this story is that ur children can paint u!

by Esfand Aashena on Thu Jan 20, 2011 12:20 PM PST

Our children can do whatever they want no matter how ridiculous (this picture :-) they may make us look!  Although, I'm not sure whether JJJ followed Saman's fashion line (punk goth fashion I suppose :-) or giving Mahdiyeh a chance to paint his father's nails!  

Everything is sacred


  •  
Faramarz

لاک ناخون ها خیلی قشنگ و رویایین!

Faramarz
Thu Jan 20, 2011 10:22 AM PST

How about a tattoo JJ?

An Iranian.com Tattoo with the Fish and the Logo!


  •  
Monda

Cool topic : )

by Monda on Thu Jan 20, 2011 07:00 AM PST

The way I see it, if I experiment with something even as harmless as an equivalent to your nail polishing, I'd like to do it only if it gives Me a kick... only then, it feels genuinely fun. But I've noticed that once I catch myself doing the bit (again no matter how trivial or harmless) to get attention of others, I'd still do it, but without announcing it.

Attention-seeking becomes part of one's character. It's useful on many levels. And it's a lot of fun to respond to as well,... oh the other week this young man (well not that young really, in his late 30's) rang me up a book with the entire interaction he had his head down, since without me requesting any info, he was telling me his take on that book's author for about 4-5 mins. Intelligent guy, interesting take and expressive style... so reflexively I lowered myself under his face tilting my head to the side to grab his eyes, Oh My! I freaked out when I saw these Red contact lensed eyes staring at me! He said with a sweet smile: Now do you see why I can't look at customers?"! I responded, if you don't mind shocking people. Well it doesn't feel right, but had to try it, he said, because he was challenging the shop owner's sense of authority... he took coffee break and we exchanged some experimental stories. 

Yeah it always serves a good purpose, one way or another. Good job JJ :o)  

p.s. are those your nails in the blog photo? you're losing weight left and right even off your fingers? 


  •  
Anahid Hojjati

At least JJ, you did not grow side burns

by Anahid Hojjati on Thu Jan 20, 2011 05:34 AM PST

Few years ago when I visited Southern California, many men had side burns. Trend never came to Northern California and thank god for it, that is one ugly hairstyle. I would prefer a man to paint his nails than have major side burns, at least I think.


  •  
Princess

Some people can carry it off

by Princess on Thu Jan 20, 2011 05:28 AM PST

  ... and some don't.

It's like some people look beautiful and sexy in revealing clothes and others don't. My rule of thumb is if it feels like a part of you and you don't have to think about it all the time, go for it, otherwise don't.

The worse case is when it is about seeking attention and it shows. I am glad you mentioned Saman. As much as I like him and his work, I am not always convinced that what he does to his appearance is always him.  

 


  •  
Mash Ghasem

Very colorful

by Mash Ghasem on Thu Jan 20, 2011 12:56 AM PST

finger nails well done, hints of art and painting. Very happy too, and courageous as well, with a bit of : frankly my dear, I don't give a ...


  •  
Anahid Hojjati

Thanks JJ, I like the part about...

by Anahid Hojjati on Thu Jan 20, 2011 12:40 AM PST

Dear JJ, this part was funny:"I arrived in London and the immigration officer, a Muslim woman in
full hejab, must have thought I was a freak. Her head was spinning from
the answers I was giving her about my job (iranian.com), my country of
residence (none), reason for visiting London (haminjoori, maybe work for
the BBC). Plus I'm sure she must have noticed my nails. She wasn't too
happy or sure about allowing me to enter the UK."

Thanks for sharing.

 


  •