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Immigrant Ho
02-Jul-2010
You act like you're on top of the world....but, I feel sorry for you.
It must have been hard growing up in Iran, under the roof of a low-class family who voted for the mullahs and were destroyed by them all the same. Anyone would want to break free. But, living in the slums of one of the less desirable cities of Iran, how do you do it: Break free?
You get some plastic surgery, first of all. I mean, who would want to act as your free ticket out of the country if you're not easier on the eyes? So, you get a boob job, nose job, skin stretch, vagina lift....and you start marketing the one thing you have; yourself. It's too bad the young, rich, handsome guys who come home to visit grandma in the summertime aren't interested in girls like you. Why would they want canned tuna when they could order sabzi polo and fresh imported mahi from a fancy menu? The older, domestic elite aren't interested either and the Haj Aghas all import their women using other channels. The dilemma is: Who wants a wife whose not too pretty and who can't take part in high school-level conversation? No, most men only want girls like you as ten-minute sighehs, right?
But, you won't have any of that. You get a new nose with all the money saved up for your dowry and you start looking for the easy target: fat, balding, over the hill, uneducated...and in possession of a U.S. Passport. Even though you can't stand the sight of him, you dress a little flirty, serve some kick-ass khoresht your mom cooked for you, giggle at his retarded jokes, and promise you're a virgin. He falls for it, hook, line and sinker, salivating at the idea of showing you off to his bowling buddies back home who can never get dates. He promises you the world if you only accept his last name; he whispers to you of Louis Vitton bags and designer dresses you've never heard of...and he intends on keeping those promises if you love him. And you say you love him; while you're laughing on the inside at his naivete. Your family accepts his money, you accept his gifts, and you sneak him some open-mouthed kisses by the street joob that smells like donkey shit outside the front yard. He promises you a future and imagines lovemaking and babies while all you see in your jaded mind are dollar signs and handsome movie stars waving at you for your arrival.
For a couple of weeks, newly arrived in America, you cling to him. It isn't as simple as you hoped it would be. You can't succeed on your own; you need him to hold onto...for a while. You're forced to sleep with him and pretend it feels good when you really wish you could throw up instead. He buys you a nice big house and fills your closets and cupboards with the finest belongings, and you stay for a while... because the hot American guys you dreamed about don't speak your language and don't give you a second glance, your American neighbors think you're a bitch, you don't have any money, you don't have any skills, and you don't have a job. But, your husband loves you, so he gets you one. 9-5 retail. You hate it; and your customers hate you. You resign yourself to the life you've chosen, while promising yourself to never have kids.
Then, you find a new crowd to target: Middle aged married Iranian-American men. They're educated, settled in life. They have nice homes, drive fancy cars, and their wives look happy. You can't remember a time in your life when you've genuinely smiled like the way their wives smile. You smile back at them, learn their secrets, share some fake ones of your own. Then, you do what you're good at, what your momma taught you well. You plot to overthrow them, like your daddy plotted to overthrow the Shah. God, you're silly; I wish I could tell you that. I can't. I can just watch and pity you. I can scream you're making a mistake as you throw yourself at a married man, thinking he'll give you a step up higher than you already are. I can sit on the sidelines and cheer for the man's wife to find out, and kick you both to the curb. I can shed tears for the children whose lives you destroy in the process of attaining your glory.
Years pass...
Most of all, mixed with the pity I feel for you, I laugh at you now and then, when I see you around town. I see how your car has been knicked down a model or two, and isn't as shiny as before. You're working now; because you have to...because you're in debt and trying to pretend you're not, even though the dark circles under your eyes give it away. Your new husband pretends he's made the right choice, but in reality he's wondering why he gave up a pretty woman for a silicone one, a good cook for a good take-out orderer, a college graduate for a bimbo. He misses his children, the ones who can't stand the sight of you. He misses his children so much that he can't imagine having children with you. He's so conflicted that he finds himself thinking of his own funeral, and who will be there and speak at the podium, and who will cry. He knows it won't be you.
So, go ahead and live your life, pretending people don't see you for who you really are, and the damage you've done. Pretend that a Burberry scarf can magically make a woman classy and that getting a Twitter account brings you enlightenment. Say the two words of english you've learned this year and be confident you belong here. Listen to him "ooh" and "ahh" when you decide to finally cook, and believe him even though you know it tastes like plastic. Laugh with your friends and tell yourself they're not laughing at you inside.
I have to give you one thing: It takes a lot of courage to wake up and look at yourself in the mirror and not want to kill yourself.
I wish you had less courage; the world might have been a better place.
Oh, and Happy 4th of July!
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|---|---|---|
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| The Girl in the Picture | 2 | Jun 30, 2010 |
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i hope my comment is taken
by i_support_khamenie on Mon Jul 05, 2010 08:26 PM PDTnot as an insult to the writer, whom is anonymous.
rather my comment is meant for the writer to reflect on her present status and to realize that your destiny and happiness is what you make out of life and not what others define you as.
so don't dwell on what has passed and plan for tomorrow.
again, i meant the writer no harm and wish her best of luck. however, remember that bitterness will only consume you first.
i hope my comment is taken
by i_support_khamenie on Mon Jul 05, 2010 07:30 PM PDTnot as an insult to the writer, whom is anonymous.
rather my comment is meant for the writer to reflect on her present status and to realize that your destiny and happiness is what you make out of life and not what others define you as.
so don't dwell on what has passed and plan for tomorrow.
again, i meant the writer no harm and wish her best of luck. however, remember that bitterness will only consume you first.
very touching
by Fatollah on Sun Jul 04, 2010 03:58 PM PDTat least you are honest and very good with words, not many are able or capable of doing that.
ISK
by minadadvar on Sun Jul 04, 2010 02:12 PM PDTHow would you feel, and/or what would you do, if your wife cheated on you ? (assuming you are a married man).
I want to remind you, stonning is not an option.
Ari
by minadadvar on Sun Jul 04, 2010 02:02 PM PDTGreat/compassionate comment.
Deeply felt, Ms_America
by Ari Siletz on Sat Jul 03, 2010 11:18 PM PDTDon;t pity me; pity yourself
by i_support_khamenie on Sat Jul 03, 2010 10:42 PM PDTThe writer shows a great amount of bitterness that is consuming herself.
Let's see:
so the other girl is getting older; but you're not? Hmmm, since when did you stop time for yourself?
Atleast a married man left a bag of potato for a better looking woman. So much for the looks
the abandoned woman flet comfy living and bearing kids and getting fat beyond belief and then wants her husband to appreciate her...
All will die, no one achives full happiness. Yet the writer dwells on the misery and the unhappy moments of the new girl while pretending she is living so ever happily, which begs the question: Who exactly is the one living in bitterness and wrting this piece?
life is amount adaptation to new situations. sounds to me, the writer hasn't been able to move past her dumping by her husband
stop hating; your hate will get you nowhere in life except consume you . you failed to improve and adapt and thought your fidelity is your ticket to "until death do us part"... you have only yourself to blame!
you put all your eggs in one basket and when it didnt work out, you lost!
How is it that you so well know that the new girl secretly wants AMerican guys while married to a bald guy....sounds to me that you were the miserable one if you are so aware of such emotions that you mistakenly think other girls feel
move over, your prime time is long over. get used to reality and again stop hating
A well written piece of a story
by Multiple Personality Disorder on Sat Jul 03, 2010 03:46 PM PDT... although it is farfetched.
Ms. America
by minadadvar on Sat Jul 03, 2010 11:11 AM PDTUnfortunatley, your blog, sounds very realistic. The victims of your main character, often endure feelings of great pain, rage, betrayal, humiliation and fear.
Surprizingly enough, they also feel ashamed. They are ashamed of being the victims of their husbands'/fathers' wrongdoings! And, even worse, they feel unable/unwilling to talk about their sufferings, for the fear of being judged negatively and/or becoming the topic of gossip. (aberro)
I wish men could find a more reasonable approach in dealing with their mid-life crisis.
The good news is that, most women are able to move on and lead happy and productive lives.
Hmmm....
by javaneh29 on Sat Jul 03, 2010 09:14 AM PDTSorry to say I recognise the character in your blog! My god you describe the girl I knew to a T! Fortunately the only one I have come across but never the less ..... the type of girl I dont ever want to have to encounter again.
I was only an observer to the whole carrying on which took time to unfold but once I had figured her I wondered at the stupidity of the 'unwitting' husband she married ( with UK citizenship)... though I think as time went on he was not altogether unaware what his wife was up to, he turned a blind eye for an easy life and turned to another T to loose himself in. The person I felt so bad for in this scenario was their child who doesnt stand a chance at normality having learnt her mothers deviousness from an early age. It was tradgic to watch.
I wish I knew what happened to them all, especially the child but Im sure it couldnt have been good the way things were going.
Reading your blog reminded me of the whole nasty business. I was always bewildered at the wifes lack of logic and the way she thought she could manipulate everything to her own advantage but perhaps you are right and it's about her upbringing! I really dont know !
........
by yolanda on Fri Jul 02, 2010 07:29 PM PDTI can feel the animosity and jealousy between the temptress (homewrecker) and the lady whose hubby got stolen by a younger and prettier temptress in this story....
It is sad!
I dare say...
by comrade on Fri Jul 02, 2010 06:08 PM PDTIt's well-written by a familiar pen. It has a biting sense of realism in itself. Here, on this site, though, it was expected to have carried at least a little sense of sympathy. We, the readers, should start not taking everything so personally!
Never late to learn....//davidharvey.org/reading-capital/
how does someone from poor family afford so much surgery
by Anahid Hojjati on Fri Jul 02, 2010 05:53 PM PDTI have not read the whole blog but in beginning part of blog, assumption is that girl is from low class family but then talk is about all surgeries. I don't get it, if this girl had so much resources to have so many surgeries, that means that she was from a family that did not need the balding...guy this blog talks about.
What an "interesting"
by Marjaneh on Fri Jul 02, 2010 05:26 PM PDTmilieu some people mingle in...
Every fascism is an index of a failed revolution - Walter Benjamin
That's aweful!
by Majid on Fri Jul 02, 2010 05:09 PM PDTWho sent/wrote it to you?
Well, may be you deserved it after all!
It's beautiful
by Real McCoy on Fri Jul 02, 2010 05:02 PM PDTI had never read an autobiography before, I must admit.
You know how to get down and
by benross on Fri Jul 02, 2010 04:55 PM PDTYou know how to get down and dirty with your bitterness!