Nazy Kaviani
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The Twilight Zone
04-Feb-2010
I had to take a business trip to Washington, DC. I hadn’t slept for 48 hours straight, preparing for my trip and tying loose ends at home. My flight was at 7:15 a.m., so my son and I set out for San Francisco International Airport at 5:00 a.m.
I checked in, turned in my luggage, went through security, bought myself a magazine and went directly to the gate. At the gate I showed the gate attendant my boarding pass and was directed to the tube that took me to my airplane. I reached a fork inside the tube. The left side said “A” and the right side said “B” or something like that. I looked at my boarding pass and saw the letter “B." I took the right corridor.
I entered the plane and went directly to the aisle seat I had reserved online and sat down. There was a young man sitting in the window seat in my row, the seat I would have normally reserved, unavailable when I had made my booking. I like the window seats, not because I like to look out the window, but because I like to curl up and sleep in the window seat, where nobody needs to wake me up to let them through to use the bathroom. I don’t like to talk during flights and I never make any friends on the planes, as a result.
After I stowed my hand luggage in the compartment over my head, and put my purse underneath the seat in front of me, the way passengers are always directed, I sat motionless, waiting to fall asleep. When a young woman arrived at my side, looking at me suspiciously, I paid no attention to her. She managed to get the flight attendant’s attention, though. I heard the flight attendant say “Oh, let me check,” after which she asked to see my boarding pass. Annoyed, I reached for my purse, pulled out the boarding pass and handed it to her. She checked it and checked the woman’s boarding pass and announced “Looks like this seat has been overbooked. It’s O.K. I’ll find you another seat,” after which the two of them disappeared and I went right to sleep. I didn’t hear the plane’s “takeoff talk,” nor any safety tips. I was asleep just as I like it when I fly.
I was dreaming. Let’s just say that it was a sweet dream, starring someone who was very welcome in my dream, when I felt someone shaking my right arm gently. I opened my eyes to find the young man to my right saying: “Excuse me, we have arrived.” I said: “Oh, really? O.K.” but he felt compelled to say “Yes, we are in Los Angeles.” Los Angeles??!! I was racking my brain. Did my flight have a stop in Los Angeles? None that I could remember! It was a direct flight to Washington DC’s Dulles Airport, to the best of my sleepy recollection. And then I thought, Oh, you know how lousy air travel service has become these days with “transport-e-shams-ol-emareh” or “cattle cart airlines” attitude, which has enabled airlines to cut down service to the point of making you pay for your one piece of checked in luggage and a pitiful snack. Maybe the plane had a stop in LA after all. Maybe the airlines are no longer obligated to tell you if they squeeze in a stop! For some reason, I decided that I was having a dream, a hallucination, or an out of body experience, and not a moment of reality. I decided to ignore the hyper young man to my right and go talk to “an authority.”
I looked at the flight attendant and said: “Are we in Los Angeles?” She said “Why, yes!” I said: “But are we going to Washington DC now?” She said “I’m afraid not!” I said: “O.K. then, there is something dreadfully wrong here. I think I got on the wrong plane and now I am in the wrong city.” The flight attendant said something like “You’d better contact someone from our ground crew.” I flashed a smile and tried to sound and appear confident, smart, and jovial, none of which I felt—at all.
I walked to the two young men behind the desk inside the terminal. I told them “I’m afraid I got on the wrong plane,” and the two of them looked at me like I was some con artist, trying to pull some kind of trick on the two of them. Is that a common occurrence at the airports? I mean, are some people routinely walking up to airport and airline authorities, claiming to be in the wrong city, asking for assistance or free flights? I don’t know.
One of them took my boarding pass and punched some things in on his keyboard. His face turned serious as he said: “May I look at your identification card?” And after checking me out he said: “Well, that's strange. It appears as though you are on that DC plane. I need to call my supervisor now. Have a seat and I will come and get you.”
I went and sat down, feeling stupid and outraged. People were expecting me at Dulles Airport in a few hours and I needed to tell them that I was not going to be there! How was I going to explain this?!! To tell you the truth, very briefly at first, the thought did pass my mind that I was one of the ones from the “chosen countries,” you know, the ones who would need to receive special scrutiny during flights. And what had I done? I had sent my friggin’ luggage on a plane that I had not boarded! Oh my God! What if by telling them that I was not aboard that DC-bound plane, they had to make it have an emergency landing now?!!! What if I was pulled into a small room inside LAX and interrogated for my no-doubt-sinister plans? Nobody knew I was in LA! I had talked to my younger son last, telling him that I was aboard my plane to DC! I could disappear and nobody would even know where I was!
I was getting all worked up, considering calling all my relatives in Orange County and San Diego, asking them to come to LAX, demanding to see me, when I heard someone page my name. Damn, no time to alert my relatives and friends now! Well, it would take them hours to get up here, anyway, and by that time my trail will already be cold! I am in this all alone, I thought. I walked back to the counter, bracing myself for an arrest or at least a friendly interrogation. Instead, I was told that my flight would leave at 11:00 a.m., with full apologies. The young man even came and escorted me to my gate at the right time, no doubt thinking that he won’t let this airhead create another unusual incident today!
Thinking about it, the lesson from the experience is even scarier than it felt at the time. All the security measures which are now making air travel a lot more complicated and a whole lot more annoying aren't worth much if passengers can switch planes at the very last minute, are they?
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Wow!
by Latina on Sun Feb 21, 2010 07:00 AM PSTI kept reading your story waiting for you to say that it was all a nightmare.
I have not traveled by airplane in over 15 years because something always would happen.
Eventually, I will have to get on an airplane if I want to explore the world.
Thank you for sharing. It was wonderfully written. As always.........
My dear Nazy, I am all yours!
by Azarin Sadegh on Fri Feb 05, 2010 01:21 AM PSTSorry! I just saw your comment! Actualy, since yesterday, I've been so busy commenting and fighting a useless fight over the ban on full veil in France on Amanpour's FB page, making a bunch of new friends and new enemies!!!...And so I didn't open IC at all. It's bad...:-)
An assignment for iranian.com sounds too serious...but I have always loved your writing assignments!
So please let me know asap, before I die of "fozooli'! Az.
نازی جان؛
Noosh AfarinThu Feb 04, 2010 09:30 PM PST
اگه در آینده چنین اتفاقی افتاد، من نزدیک فرودگاه کار میکنم، بمن زنگ بزن ظرف 4-6 دقیقه میام دنبالت.
Welcome to my world
by Jahanshah Javid on Thu Feb 04, 2010 07:03 PM PSTI've taken the plane to Los Angeles while I was supposed to go Phoenix. I've gone to Dulles airport when I was supposed to go to Reagan National. I've gone to a bus station in Spain when I was supposed go to a train station in France. I've taken a van to Mexico when it was supposed to be a bus. I've booked a hotel in Mexico City when it was actually in a village 100 kms away... none of these screw ups have anything to do with tough security measures :)
Next time
by tissa on Thu Feb 04, 2010 05:20 PM PSTNazy jan,
Next time, get on the plane to Tahiti.
Nazy jan, khoda bad nadeh!
by Monda on Thu Feb 04, 2010 08:43 PM PSTressidan bekhair... What a Story!
Dear Nazy, I am glad that all went well
by Anahid Hojjati on Thu Feb 04, 2010 04:03 PM PSTDear Nazy, I am glad that everything worked out. To make you realize that you are not the only one making air travel related mistakes, I share with you my own. Few years ago, I travelled to LA and there was only one problem that I forgot to take my luggage with me. Thankfuly the trip was planned to be a very short trip so I could just spend little amount of money and get around.
Yikes!
by Ari Siletz on Thu Feb 04, 2010 02:54 PM PSTDear SBGlobe
by Nazy Kaviani on Thu Feb 04, 2010 02:12 PM PSTShahnaz Jan:
My return flight was not nearly as eventful as my flight over, but the heavy snow was exciting, too. My friends were absolutely wonderful to me in DC and I will definitely go back to rattle their cages and visit with them again soon. I will also publish my memories from my visit with Iranian.com users soon and you are in it!
Just as I will be bugging Azarin, very soon I will be coming your way to ask you to help out with an Iranian.com project in DC. I know you are very kind and you will say yes! You really are a very gracious individual, SBGlobe-e aziz! See you in May if not sooner.
Dear Yolanda
by Nazy Kaviani on Thu Feb 04, 2010 02:03 PM PSTHeeh! I wish I had accomplished another "impossible" thing, something worth praise. As is, I feel sheepish telling this story, because only a really dumb person would end up in an unintended destination, even if there were no security precautions and measures! I don't mind it, though! It will give me endless conversation material (and my friends an endless source for teasing me)!
Thanks for reading Banafsheh Jan.
Dear MPD
by Nazy Kaviani on Thu Feb 04, 2010 01:56 PM PSTThanks for reading and for your thoughtful comment. Window seats are the best if you are not a hyper air passenger. The worst thing that could happen, though, is if you are in the window seat and there is a mother and a screaming baby next to you. You won't be able to sleep and you can't go anywhere, really! More than once when this has happened, I have found myself helping out with some "babysitting in the air," which has kept me from sleeping and has delivered me to my destination exhausted and jet lagged! But my neighbors were happy with the help, so I guess it all worked out!
I am going to write the airline and see what perks I can conjure up, if any. If I get anything good I will let you know.
Anonymouse Jan
by Nazy Kaviani on Thu Feb 04, 2010 01:46 PM PSTYes, it was a fork and all the signs said was A and B (or something like that, I can't remember too well.) Checking and double checking in this case would have been to ask the flight attendants specifically about the plane's destination the minute I boarded. I am also almost 100% sure that if I had stayed up, I would have heard the pilot or crew say something like "Welcome to flight XYZ to Los Angeles International Airport." I wonder what I would have done if I had heard it! I would have panicked and I would have caused a scene on the flight! If I had panicked and looked deranged (a very serious possibility), they would have contacted the other plane to make them have an emergency landing, I guess! I don't know, the possibilities are, unfortunately, unlimited when order is disrupted deliberately or inadvertently.
Next time I curl up to sleep the entire flight long, I'll make sure I know where I'm heading first! But did you know that they don't check boarding passes as you get on the airplane anymore? The last checking point seems to be when they feed the boarding pass to the machine who scans it and verifies your legitimacy on the flight. Well, it did check mine and look at where I ended up!
Dear Azarin
by Nazy Kaviani on Thu Feb 04, 2010 12:56 PM PSTThanks so much for reading and for commenting. I would have definitely called you, had I been made to stay longer! I would have probably made my "one phone call" to you, Azarin! Kidding aside, I would say this all ended well, considering all that could have gone wrong. I have had a good laugh at myself afterward and it gave me a good subject to write about.
Azarin Jan, since you are so kind to offer, I hope it's O.K. with you if I contact you soon about a volunteer assignment for Iranian.com! I will be along with more information soon. Thanks again for your generous offer! Taarof oomad, nayamad dareh!
how was your flight back?
by sbglobe on Thu Feb 04, 2010 12:53 PM PSTNazy jan me too think that you should “definitely complain to the airline” but in my view not for “free tickets” but because they robbed you out of getting famous. Imagine what would have happened if they had “interrogated you” and diverted your original flight because your suitcase was there but you were not. There would have been a big scene for nothing and you would have been in middle of it …. Here we go, a golden opportunity was missed (you could even write a book about it). But instead they realize that they made a very bad mistake and they decided to use their common sense and cut their lost by apologizing to you and put you on the next plain to DC. I like to think that they realized how lucky the whole situation became - a bad mistake and nothing more. In any case, I hope your flight back was less eventful and I am sure your friends are already missing you in DC
......
by yolanda on Thu Feb 04, 2010 12:37 PM PSTHi Nazy,
What a story! Oh Gosh! How could this happen? It is embarrassing to the airline! You are kind that you only published your story on IC, not in LA Times or Washington Post......there must be a loophole somewhere allowing this to happen.....
thanks for sharing!
......
by yolanda on Thu Feb 04, 2010 12:22 PM PSTHi! MPD,
OMG! Your anecdotes crack me up! For me, I have no complaints if the plane does not crash.....Thanks for the laugh!!
I don’t like aisle seats either
by Multiple Personality Disorder on Thu Feb 04, 2010 11:14 AM PSTThe aisle seats are too busy with activities, one has to be accommodating to inner passengers, people and equipment walking in the aisles, and bags falling on one’s head from the overhead compartment.
I’m not too fund of window seats either. I keep imagining the airplane crashing on its side, the side that I am sitting at, and shaving off my face on the tarmac while I look out the window. That leaves me the middle seat, which the idea of sitting in between two other people gives me the creeps. Unlike window and aisle seats where one can shift one’s legs away from the other people, in middle seats surely sooner or later one’s legs would touch either one of the people on the left or right, or both. You know, I come from a culture of temporary marriages! So, I keep thinking, if the next person to me is a woman, and single, I should ask her to marry me for a few hours, and in exchange I could buy them a drink or something, you know just to be mahram for a while, while we are traveling together in such proximity. I’m sure in Qom Airline they are providing such a service! Don’t you think so?
I was once in an airplane on a long trip and this woman pull out her teat and started giving milk to her infant child. I mean, what was I supposed to do! Excuse me lady, we’re supposed to be married before I see your teats! I understand that the baby was hungry, but so was I!
Another time I was in a window seat with this overweight guy in the middle seat taking a nap and I had to use the bathroom, and he was like stuck in his seat and couldn’t move, and felt so bad for for the guy.
Anyway, these are the things that I worry about when I’m flying. Things like taking the wrong airplane don’t bother me, well, it didn’t bother me until now. As long as I’ve lived in this country I’ve never, ever, heard of anyone taking the wrong airplane! I think considering the state of high security concerns over terrorism, you were lucky you were not interrogated, or the other airplane that was carrying your luggage was not forced to make an emergency landing somewhere before it reached Washington D.C.
I would definitely complain to the airline though. Maybe at least you can get a free ticket out of this ordeal.
Sounds awful! So was it the A fork? I'd ck & double ck, I guess
by Anonymouse on Thu Feb 04, 2010 05:34 AM PSTEverything is sacred.
oh my goodness!
by Azarin Sadegh on Thu Feb 04, 2010 02:36 AM PSTMy dear Nazy,
I'd say it is actually very scary what you've been through! But please next time you are stuck in LAX, dont forget to give me a call, so I can invite you to Chello kabob..:-)
Az.