Diaries of a rebel

Midwesty

I am a Sufi Neo-Zoroastrian (and a few other things as well) so of course my views are going to be colored by Mowlavi's. Thanks for noticing, but I am not just saying this stuff for any literary effect. I really believe that L-O-V-E is what it's all about so all of us need to heed Mowlavi's words when he says, har kas ku dur mand az asl-e-khish baz juyad ruzegar-e-vasl-e-khish/whoever fell far away from their source, let them find the day of reunion with it!

There is no barrier or qualification placed on how you get back to this source. The emphasis is just to get back no matter how far you've fallen away from it. And what is this source of yourself? It is your own heart. Period. And how do you find your way back to it? The fastest way is to fall in love with another human being who sincerely reciprocates in turn. And it is never too late or too early to do this.

But the problem is that in this decadent materialistic civilization we're living under presently we're constantly being programed to believe by the world around us (and it doesn't matter whether you're inhabitant in the West or the East, the whole present human civilization is decadent and corrupt in my view) that love is an illusion and that such things are fables and fairy tales. It is as if our whole present culture is programing us from the cradle to become soulless cynics disillusioned with the most fundamental and core existential fact of our very existence here.

I look at it like this as well. The human soul is here to pair with another human soul for the perfectibility of both souls as well as the perfectibility of others besides these two. You can look at it from this Zoroastrian perspective also that such pairing of one human soul with another human soul (usually female with male) is about continuing the perfectibility of Yazdan's creation through such an act especially when this pairing is accomplished through the leaven of Yazdan's fundamental creative energy: love. When we fall in love, love intensely, and above all have this love returned to us by our complement, we are engaged with the Divine in the diffusion of the life force of the Divine itself through creation. You can look at it as either being in partnership with the Divine to such end or that such a reality is the Divine actively working through us when it occurs. To fall into negativity and cynicism about love is in essence to feed the darkness of ahriman and the counterpowers of darkness and so corrupt Yazdan's creation to which we are emissaries. The greater the negativity and cynicism, the greater the darkness is fed. The greater the love and positivity about at least this one thing, the more we feed and upraise the Divine Light. You can be cynical and pessimistic about everything else, but with this one thing we are all called to succeed and not fail. So hate the world and be as pessimistic about it as you want, but if you have passionately loved one person in your life (or your soul cries to you right now to find it again, to whose call you must heed!) you have accomplished the greatest thing there is and have been an agent of spreading the NUR of Yazdan, thereby fulfilling your own life purpose here.

And there is no religion or philosophy required to accomplish any of this. Just follow the passion of your own heart for your beloved (whether present or absent) and let your own soul guide you to this destination, and all will be well.

Anyway, enough of my pontificating, but it always kills me to see people give up on l-o-v-e and romance.

-

May we be amongst those who are to bring about the transfiguration of the Earth - Yasna XXX 9

Hallelujah

LYRICS

I've heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do you?
It goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty
in the moonlight
overthrew you
She tied you
To a kitchen chair
She broke your throne,
she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Maybe I've been here before
I know this room, I've walked this floor
I used to live alone before I knew you
I've seen your flag on the marble arch
love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

There was a time you'd let me know
What's real and going on below
But now you never show it to me do you?
Remember when I moved in you?
The holy dark was moving too
And every breath we drew was hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Maybe there's a God above
And all I ever learned from love
Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
It's not a cry you can hear at night
It's not somebody who's seen the light
It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

.......

Thank you, Aryana-Vaeja, for your great post!

Thank you, Nazy, for your great post!

Aryana

What you said is very close to Rumi's outlook as a matter of his writings in his romantic book of poems, Ghazaliat, he emphasizes that loveing one is the absolute form of freedom since it frees you from everyone.

Parchin,

About your comment:  “Romance is a delusion”

I feel that from a rational point of view romance is a delusion but on the other hand most humans are creatures of emotion, some more than others, each individual has a unique nature and thought process and some may find life to be very dull and boring when adopting a 100% rational approach to life and for others there may be no other way than to be rational all the time but I personally feel that there is nothing wrong with being reasonably romantic at times (if you naturally have it in you) I personally think that it is wonderful to have the ability to occasionally  express love, share strong affection, great warmth, intensity, enthusiasm and imagination with other  humans and creatures that “would truly understand, appreciate it”, it gives us the opportunity to celebrate our nature and freedom of spirit and ads a little spice and color to life!

And as for your comment about infidelities, one cannot generalize, both men and women cheat or can be very selfish and abusive in a relationship!

I think that Nazi Kaviani nails it with her wise comment; I may probably be close to her station in life and can totally relate and see GREAT value in her comment:

“I believe now that there are no hard and fast rules to how and when and where we would find "the one." I just know that if we keep on looking, we will find him or her.

I think we must learn to walk away from people who hurt us, instead of loving us. People who make us insecure and jealous must be dumped immediately. True love can only flourish where there is peace.”

Don’t give up hope and try not to be jaded by a few bad experiences, if I were you I would write down Nazi’s advice in a note book and read it each time you are in doubt about a relationship, I think as a reminder to myself I will do the same for it is in our human nature to “forget” ;))

You forgot to address the most important thing of all

L-O-V-E

Where has it gone? The very leaven of life itself. The thing that every poet and visionary since the days of the cavemen has written and sung about. The one thing that is rarer than the alchemical gold. The beginning and the end of all things.

Monogamy or polygamy, sticking to traditional values of one man with one woman or chucking it all out and opening the gates to swinging romp-fest city, fidelity or infidelity, jealousy or equanimity, sacrifice or selfishness, etc, none of these means anything without Ishq.

If you have found it, even if you've lost it, be you a bum, you have found the animating purpose of all life. If you've never found it and have ceased believing it, even if you are Donald Trump or Stephan Hawking,  you have missed the boat and squandered the whole purpose of your life.

It is really as simple as that. All the rationalizations and arguments about why contemporary relationships are falling apart and people have become the way they have are simply excuses to not address this most basic, elementary but core of all existential questions. It is all about LOVE and whether you're one of few who've realized true love at least once in your life. 

Romance is not a delusion, at least romance that is about love and not just lust. The delusion is in the lost faith. Really, cynicism around LOVE is a form of madness. Of course love itself is madness, but it is the only madness worth having because it is the madness  that flavors and colors life in its agonies and sweet ecstasies because a life without it is like a painting without color :)

-

May we be amongst those who are to bring about the transfiguration of the Earth - Yasna XXX 9

Your sarcastic opening with the cave stories

have made me uncertain about your core idea, freedom in relationships.First about the cave story, if women could ever put up with shit we were still cavemen. Since we are not, then the story of rubbing the fungus infected feet is just a myth.Now the core idea. I love freedom more than I love to be loved. So when my loveless life tries to get on my nerve, I put him through the hell of the-date-night-after-six-shave, a week long shopping-to-impress spree, watching the look of the rednecks looking at an overdressed, walking cologne bottle, sweaty with a face redder than the flowers he is carrying out of the department store, and so on.And yes I agree with your core idea however your introduction tells me you might not.

Let’s do the math

.

.

"gheyrat" + insanity = murder in a jealous rage

:O)

Parchin

Good to see you back! At my age and station in life, I believe now that there are no hard and fast rules to how and when and where we would find "the one." I just know that if we keep on looking, we will find him or her.

I think we must learn to walk away from people who hurt us, instead of loving us. People who make us insecure and jealous must be dumped immediately. True love can only flourish where there is peace.

you're right, there are a

you're right, there are a lot of old couples. But all of them have worked through the infidelities and the secretaries and the younger women. The rest just didn't make it through. 

Alas, a realist!

I like. Romance is a delusion. 

......

Monogamy is good......so guys don't need to take the paternity test....the little kids will know who their dads are.......another thing is that AIDS & STD's are around.......so it is better to be careful!

the other way around !

They way I see it it’s the other way around,

Jealousy + "gheyrat" + insanity + = insecurity

think that when we reach the point of getting close to truly knowing ourselves, be happy, comfortable and confident about who/what we are and what it is that truly matters to us

And start living for ourselves and not care about how others may think of us “being yourself”

We stand a better chance at having a normal and natural relationship. Despite the fact that in our day and age most marriages end up in divorce once in a while we all come across older couples that have lived a life time together, have grown old tighter and still seem to be in love at an old age! It may be that in our day and age we have adopted a sort of “its all about me” attitude towards everything! I believe that our “true intentions” in wanting to be in a relationship is also a major determinater in outcomes now days! As far as marriage is concerned, the generations before us would normally get married with the intension of forming a family and having kids and all other personal interests if any would revolve around the main objective and even now (in our time) we can often see that those are normally the type of marriages that last.

We may be living in a society today were men want to marry a trophy wife and women marry for financial security or in short to fill one another’s insecurities and were the word “compromise” is a thing of the past.

Who knows? It’s a very complicated subject, one can only hope to become wiser and learn from experience. ;)