Reading between the lines

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Siamack Baniameri
by Siamack Baniameri
12-Nov-2007
 

Like pieces of puzzle, it is all coming together. It is inevitable. The war with Iran—that is. The signs are everywhere. Any individual with access to internet can clearly see the unnerving symbolism. The wheel has been set in motion and there is no turning back. The two countries are on a collision course and just about everything around us is pointing to that unfortunate direction.


Here are the signs:

1. Asked about the predicament of Iran’s nuclear ambitions, French president Sarkozy rolled to his right and discharged a suspicious sound from the vicinity of his buttocks, which clearly means that French are ready to participate in a bombing campaign against Iran.

2. Israel’s Natural Resources Deputy Minister in an interview with WSJ said that the amount of rain in the Middle East will double this winter, which really means bombs will be raining down on Iran by this winter.

3. Paris Hilton while shopping in Beverly Hills for a new cell phone told Paparazzi that she goes through a cell phone every week, which really means, bomb these fucking Iranians and get it over with already.

4. President Bush, while visiting wounded soldiers at Walter Reed Medical Center, laughingly told reports that his VP, Dick Cheney, has managed to hunt for the past two years without shooting anybody in the face in reference to the 2006 accident where the VP shot and injured a fellow hunter in a Texas ranch, which really means Cheney is formulating the plans to smoke every Iranian that happens to be floating in a canoe in the Persian gulf.

5. Steve Jobs, the brain behind iPod and iPhone, is working on a plan to introduce a new killer technology at the end of this fall. Jobs told the eager Apple diehards that the name of the new gadget will stars yet again with “letter i,” which means iRan, also starting with letter i, will be bombed at the end of this fall for sure.

6. Rudy Juliani in a Republican presidential debate mentioned the war on drugs and reiterated that the US must militarily intervene in Columbia to take out the drug lords, which was a stab at president Ahmadinejad who appeared at the Columbia University a few months back.

7. And of course the most compelling evidence of the invasion of Iran is the recent concert by LA Persian band, Black Cats, which featured their new song, “baby joon, darim bar-megardim,” which clearly shows that Iran will be bombed and Black Cats will return to pursue their lifelong dream of opening a beauty salon in southern part of Tehran.

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more from Siamack Baniameri
 
Tugger

Hello compromise, bye bye hopes for democracy.

by Tugger on

The Mullahs want to stay in power. The US wants oil. It has all the makings of a nice compromise.

Here is me in power. Tell you what Iran, you drop support for Hamas and Hezbollah and forget about Nuclear weapons and we'll build you refineries, sell you computers, M16s, F16s, torture chambers, surveilance systems, anything you need to stay in power for the next thousand years.

Screw democracy in Iran. Thats not our concern.

Signed

President Tugger


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Re:BS from SB

by UrBiggestFan (not verified) on

to deep shit: i enjoy reading your shit, keep'em coming;)
to Siamak: i simply love u man.
..from ur biggest fan:)


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BS from SB

by deep shit (not verified) on

SB you are reading INTO the lines rather than
BETWEEN the lines. You have to get into the deep shit to interpret the shit:

1. Unlike all other languages, French is spoken
by farting through the anus. Sarkozy is just doing the French thing: They drink a lot of wine to fart better. This makes them smell better.

2. The Israeli anouncement of increased rainfall
is just to explain that all those hot gases made in France will generate more rainfall in the Middle
East. It's also intended to boost Israel's tourist revenues.

3. Paris (get the namecode?) Hilton is too busy
fucking, to give a fuck about anything else.

4. After making a pile of shit out of the Middle East, Bush/Cheney are looking forward to very
comfortable retirements, and to handing over
ongoing Western Shit Production to their successors.

5. Steve Jobs' biologic father is reputed to have been of mysterious Middle Eastern origin, possibly even Iranian: Hence Jobs' obsession with the letter "i": Just symbolism, nothing ievil.

6. Rudy's Columbia reference was just a coded policy statement about all the shit that will be targeted at Venezuala's shithead Chavez.

7. The Black Cats mean they're returning when all the shit is finally cleaned out of their home.

And the shit goes on...... thanks and keep the shit going.


Orang Gholikhani

:-)

by Orang Gholikhani on

I liked number 3 and 7


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To "Faribors Maleknasri M.D."

by Fatollah (not verified) on

Colonel Siamak! Why did not your brother call his son for Fatollah? Fatollah occupied the lowest rank whom also did not accept the "devilish regime" after 1953! Why Siamak? and Not Fatollah? By the way, what does M.d. stands for?
Fatollah


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No Bombing …

by mama (not verified) on

The US will not bomb Iran. You have to read between the lines. IRI and the US have made a deal. You can see the signs everywhere in the Middle East.

Iraq is becoming more relaxed environment for the US
Iranian hostages are released by the US
The US has quietly moved away one of its carrier groups from the Persian Gulf.


Jahanshah Javid

AHSANT

by Jahanshah Javid on

Classic Baniameri! Kheyli khandidam :o)))

But seriously, will they bomb Iran? With turmoil in Pakistan and Georgia, high tensions in Turkey, the mess in Iraq, instability in Afghanistan... it's one ugly picture.


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Number 3 in the article

by Faribors Maleknasri M. D. (not verified) on

Please Mr. Siamak I have a question to statement 3:
Does your formulationof the Sentence means somehow for example iranians are f....this most drunk Nothing? which plays the main role in the life of middle class western poeple?
Please excuse me also because calling you by your first name. the reason is: a son of a brother of mein has the same name. he became the name because in the time as he was borned the first group of iranian officers who did not accept the devilish regim in iran after 1953 were executed. Colonel Siamak was the officer with most hich military grade. However Siamak was his family name.
It is a pleasure to read the facts you have described. Greetings