Sorry Ms. El

Well, it all started with me and going to college. You see I had this sexy beautiful intelligent Iranian professor, and when she spoke, man did I pay attention. Thing was, at first she seemed unapproachable, but that shit soon changed.

Now do not get me wrong. This lady is probably one of the most honorable women I've ever known. It's just that at the beginning of the semester she started speaking to me not in a provocative manner — but out of the blue she started kidding around with me and believe me I asked myself a hundred times over: was it me or is she like that with all the guys?

But my question got answered because she only behaved that way with me. There were other guys in the class but Miss Iran made an effort to learn my name before any of the other fellas in the class. Plus she always looked at me a lot in the beginning.

This is the part where shit gets confusing because after a while she began to not look at me a lot and started to act more reserved around me, and hey, isn't she supposed to? She's my professor. But that did not stop me. So what I unknowingly did was mess up on my mid-term exam and that presented me with a real chance to get closer to her.

So I came to class one day and she told me that she was taking a look at the exam but did not have it with her at the moment. But she did not forget me sexy but my reaction was disappointment because she was pushing my time table back with her, because you have to understand that at first I really did not have a chance to play around with her as much as I wanted to.

She was really popular among the students. Of course she had some critics and shit — like these Spanish girls that sat where I was sitting. These two fools were just jealous of my girl's beauty. But because she was popular, too many people were always around so that affected my timing and I had to wait for the right time to act.

So what I wound up doing was catching her after class and setting up an appointment with her to talk about the mid-term exam and how I messed up on it. So she was her usual womanly self and gave me one. And yo, I took advantage of it. So what I did next shocked the hell out of my Middle Eastern princess.

I came to her office the next morning with a bouquet of Casablanca lilies. These flowers are really pretty and the smell they give off is heavenly. She was really taken back by the gesture and thanked me repeatedly and said I made her day. That made me happy to know that I put a smile on that gorgeous face.

But then after I left her office and subsequently came back to her class, she was acting all spaced and shit — like she was in a daze. Maybe because a student gave her flowers and she thought it was a little inappropriate to accept them. But believe me, when I gave them to her I made sure to make her feel real comfortable with it.

Oh yeah I forgot to mention the card that I had attached to the flowers. It read: “To EL******** A Great teacher and an even more exceptional mother. May this let you know that you're appreciated.” And that shit must of floored her cause yo, what you got to understand is that she was recently divorced from her husband for three years and this happened between me and her in 2001 spring semester. So me doing that made her have mixed emotions, because her idiot Iranian husband did not see what he had in front of him but I did and still do. Plus she has two kids who are a little rebellious.

But back to the story, and so after she finished acting weird she must have reflected on what I did and felt that it was real nice and sweet of me to do that for her. And so when Monday came she brings to class a thank you card that was well put and things that made me know that she really appreciated my efforts, and yo, this is the crazy part.

Now I'm the type of person who does not like to settle. I want what I think is the best out their in women and that does not mean their bodies — just overall personality and stuff. Plus the face has to be appealing. But I wanted to get to know my professor on another level and I somewhat achieved that. But even with the flowers I did not want to push things with her too far. So what I wound up doing is not seeing her for ten months and if you're paying attention you'll notice that I had her for a teacher in spring of 2001. I did not see her again till March 2002.

Some of you may wonder why? Well what fucked up event happened between then and now? Three guesses give up: The World Trade Center attacks and of course the subsequent blaming of anyone who is of Middle Eastern discent — and my girl could pass for a Puerto Rican. But she looks way more beautiful than one of them. But you know, Puerto Rican women think they're god's gift to men. But they have not met Middle Eastern women I guess.

But back to the story… She could pass for a Puerto Rican woman to the untrained eye. But like I said, she is way better looking. But her last name is obviously Middle Eastern, so she stood out. And I know she is proud of her heritage and would not try to hide it even if it caused her problems — like this White woman saying some retarded shit to her that made her feel awkward.

But I found all this stuff out when I saw her in March. And might I add that she was very pleased to see me. She showed it in every gesture she made towards me. It was a very pleasant experience that all of a sudden turned all too strange.

While visiting with her, she made a comment about the flowers I gave her and asked if she ever thank me for them? And I said sure you did; you gave me a card. She said yeah, because some flowers they only last for a couple of hours; those flowers you gave me lasted for days and the smell was so beautiful.

She really enjoyed the gift that — I might add — cost 127 dollars. That's why the flowers did not go bad. I'm no fucking miser when it comes to the ladies that I want to spend time with.

So check this out: To make a long story short I gave her another bouquet since then; this one was better than the last and it cost more. Hey I'm not super rich but I can do this for her. But her reaction floored me because it was so different than what she was telling me when I came to see her in her office. She was condescending and rude especially when she was telling me that the flowers looked like they had cost a lot. I'm like, in my mind, yeah, they did, but so what is your point?

She tells me she wished I had not done that. I'm saying to myself, What kind of reaction is this coming from? A person who just finished telling me she knows the difference between cheap ass flowers and good ones? Hey, is it me or is she giving off mixed messages or what?

Hey, I skipped over other stuff that happened before I gave her the flowers. But I think I deserved better than what transpired. But that's not the worst thing that happened. During the conversation she tells me that I was her student and she has fond memories of me. Nice, right? Wrong! That shit sounded like, Now I'm getting designated by her. And she goes on further to say that, I feel bad; I know you work hard and it's not necessary to give me flowers.

Look, I'm not crazy. I've never pressured this woman or backed her into a corner like asking her out on a date. My motives were purely selfless in terms of wanting to put a smile on her face. Shit just totally backfired on me.

This is the kicker, it's a dewsey: She offers to send me something to show her appreciation for the gift, which I did not ask for nor did I make her feel as if she had to. But I accepted, indirectly, and to this day I have not received anything from her. I ask you fellas out there was that necessary or what? All she had to say was the flowers were lovely. But yo, they were beyond that. These flowers were worthy of a princess. And if she wanted to add meaning in that, it's not necessary.

I don't care, but to do what she subsequently did, confuses me to this day. And man… women are fucking nuts. Take it from me: Only the lonely can play!

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