What does it feel to die? How am I going to feel when I draw my last breath? Is it going to hurt? Am I going to be scared? Sad? In peace? When will the time be? At what time of my life? How much will I have done? how much will be unfinished? How am I going to die? In sleep? A car wreck? Freak accident? Illness? Who is going to go before me? What close family member or friend am I going to lose, if I will, before I go? Will I die in this decade of my life? 40’s?50’s? 60’s? 80”s? will pass the 100 point? How lonely will I get in my last years of life? How long will my memory last? What’s the range of my mortality? Five years? Ten? When will be the last time that someone will mention my name and then I’ll be forgotten forever? Why the hell can I not shake these somber, depressing thoughts off? And why the hell they pop up even more when I’m having a great time one way or another? Do I need help? Is this normal? Am I or am I not losing my freakin’ mind?
