On Saturday, Bobby Jindal, an Indian-American became the first to become the governor of Louisiana. Not only that, but at age 36, he is also the youngest governor in US history. If beating those odds weren’t enough, he is also a Republican, won the election with 53% of the vote, and does not apparently have a blue-eyed blonde haired, “surgically enhanced” trophy wife, and accompanying kids with Golden Retriever. His campaign mantra (sorry)? Reform of the corrupt Louisiana political system, and transparency in government dealings with lobbyists. This while being a former Hindu converted Catholic, in favor of Intelligent Design and against Abortion. Talk about indigestible spicy curry! I don’t even think that there are all that many Indians in Louisiana. Even though it is technically almost as hot and humid as most parts of India, and home of the red pepper.
Often, as Iranians, we feign some sort of unfounded superiority over Indians. We never seem to take them seriously and occasionally even direct anger, resentment, and annoyance towards them when they appear to succeed. Which they almost always do. Hardly once are Indians considered fairly, and there is always some excuse or some unfair advantage taking, or some obvious white man’s buttkissing claimed as the reason for their success.
The best we’ve got politically, apparently is Jimmy Delshad, the Mayor of Beverly Hills, which is possibly the only known instance of a joke actually being true! Especially since this isn’t even a real elected post, more of an appointment by rotation, off the largely ceremonial Board. Certainly nothing close to Governor. But Oh did we celebrate this hollow victory! Even though it’s an embarrassing ethnic slur. After 30 years, this is what we have to show for our presence in this country! The rotating mayor in one of the country’s most pretentious, unimportant, unimpacting places on earth. From a people who claim the creation of very civilization itself!
On Saturday, this reached a pinnacle as it has now become obvious that we, not Indians may in fact be the y (why?) in the equation we have been incorrectly solving for x. Frankly, with our piss poor participation, we don’t appear to deserve a place at this American table, and we are the ones who are apparently inferior in the balance of cultures. To be fair, we may have BEEN deserving ONCE. But as the years of victim-mentality indifference, laziness, and stuck up self worship, continue to scream by us like an endlessly long bad movie, it is becoming more and more obvious we simply don’t care to support our own and help them (and us) stand up and represent this land of the “for free”. I say “For free”, because it appears America is free for anyone who is just barely brave enough to simply reach out and take it. America it seems, works best when you actually use it. Hopefully to do good things. Let it sit unused and America is ineffective and useless. And sitting around unusefully can make you cynical. Which this post completely proves.
Maybe it’s the eons of oppression we have endured as king upon endless king have risen out of the Caspian sea or Persian Gulf and used us like mere feeder fish, fish raised only to feed the bigger fish in the main aquarium. Depending on which king, some of us get picked to be admired in the main aquarium, only to be relegated back to feeder status when the king’s inevitable time comes and the king and kingdom falls to another next in line. The problem with all of this, and the reality is, that the kings are usually the worst examples of the collective “Us”. Often with really weird ideas. Yet somehow, we continually allow them, or somehow they con or intimidate us into letting them be king. Rarely have any of our kings been deserving of the job.
Your assignment? Name me one king who deserved it. You can even include any fictitious kings in any of our poetry! Can’t name even one? Then you lose, and your penalty is that you must put aside king-worship and king-fear and actively participate in the process of restoring our collective destiny.