Sugar menopause

I grew up in a household where dessert was the main staple. My mother made the best cheesecake, chocolate cake, angel food cake, lemon meringue pie, apple pie, cup cakes, doughnuts… oh my god, it was insane.

And I loved candy so much I would become a petty thief when my weekly allowance ran out. I would stuff my pocket with Mars bars and walk out the store. (Well, I only did it once. Maybe twice!)

But in the past few months there’s been a dramatic change. It’s like I’m going through sugar menopause or something. Maybe I’ve become diabetic. Or I’ve got cancer. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me!

Earlier this year I vaguely remember having something sweet and suddenly feeling not so good, physically. It was as if I was eating pure sugar, not a piece of chocolate. I thought maybe I was just not in the mood that day. Maybe I felt guilty about breaking my diet. But no, this aversion to sugar has gotten steadily worse.

A few weeks ago my ex-girlfriend made this popular Hungarian dessert and after one bite, I was done. I actually told her it was terrible and she should never offer it to anyone ever again. I wanted her to know the truth. I was being a true friend. (A true olaagh more like it.)

Just yesterday at the local supermarket here in Budapest I stood for a good five minutes by a fridge full of all kinds of ice cream: Chocolate, double chocolate, caramel, almonds, strawberry … No reaction. I couldn’t believe it. I forced myself to grab one but 30 seconds later I put it back. I knew I was going to get a bad sugar high and feel awful.

So I don’t know. Is this a phase? Will I ever be able to enjoy a Mars bar again? Who knows. I haven’t lost my sweet tooth entirely, but it’s pretty close to zero compared to the past 48 years.

I’m actually very lucky. Cutting sugar is the hardest thing for those like me who’ve always had a weight problem. Now it’s a piece of cake.

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