Why Are We So Hairy?

I have been thinking about this.  What’s the deal with our fur suit?  Seriously, have you Iranian men taken a look at yourselves coming out of the shower?  You look like wet black tamarins.  I’ve pondered all the possible environmental causes that may have given rise to what is now a genetic phenomenon–but none of them seem to provide an answer.

First I thought it must have been the warm, semi-arid climate which dominates most of Iran.  But if that was the case, Africans should be the hairiest of all.  But African men are usually not hairy at all.  Then I thought perhaps it’s the cold mountainous climate was the cause of this genetic adaptation, and the hair is a meant to keep our bodies warm.  But that doesn’t seem to be the answer either, since by that logic, Scandinavians should all look like apes.  But they don’t have hairy bodies either.  So, what’s the cause?  Any ideas?

Oh, I had one last thought.  Perhaps I was wrong.  Perhaps there’s a God.  And watching us, she realized what a petty, silly bunch we are.  So, she built us a fur suit to make us look even funnier.  I think that theory makes the most sense.

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