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Ammeh Soghra of all people! 
Solidarity with the disqualified candidates!

By Behrouz Joon
January 14, 2004

The news from Iran has been quite distressing to my whole family. The Guardian Council has disqualified Ammeh Soghra from running for office! 

Ammeh Soghra of all people! 

How could anyone doubt her loyalty?! Her revolutionary credentials are beyond question! During the Shah's reign she once attacked a short bald man whom she thought to be Prime Minister Hoveyda with a malaagheh (as it turned out the poor old man was a Lebanese tourist on vacation in Iran, but it's the thought that counts right?)

Ammeh Soghra was a true believer; she shed blood for the cause: she lost an eye during the first year of the revolution (she was having chai, during a television speech by Shahid Beheshti, and she was so excited she forgot to remove the spoon from her fenjoon). 

She was so devout that early in the revolution not only did she see the image of the late Imam on the moon, but also saw the image of Ayatollah Rafsanjani on a milk carton! Later when she started seeing the silhouette of Mickey Mouse in the Sun, she had to go on medication, but she's much better now -- honestly! 

Ammeh Soghra is a fighter, and she will not go down without a fight. I talked to her yesterday, and she has joined the sit in protest in progress (except her legs hurt so she didn't go down to the parliament, she's sitting in at home in her living room, it's a good thing she has the Hindi satellite to keep her company... poor old woman would be bored out of her wits otherwise). 

In closing I pray that the Guardian Council reevaluates my Ammeh Soghrah's candidacy (otherwise she's going to immigrate to the United States, and since L.A. is too crowded she will end up staying with me). 

I am hopeful about the future of Iran. I'm reminded by my father's words, who once said to me in Persian, "Pesaram, Iran ye roozi dorost misheh, vali to hichvaght adam nemishi!" (My son, Iran will become a decent country one day, but you'll never evolve into a homo sapien!)


After being born in "Eye Ran", and growing up "bi-cultural" on three different continents (a kinky way to say I'm mentally confused and emotionally screwed up) Behrouz Joon (my stealthy nom de plume) lives and practices law (which means I'm still practicing and haven't gotten it right yet!) in the San Francisco Bay Area. His hobbies include subjecting the world to his tasteless and juvenile humor! Vist his weblog.

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By Behrouz Joon

Lawyer from hell




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Hegemony or Survival
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By Noam Chomsky

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