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Satellite Revolution!
Dude, it's over. People are in the streets... but not me

June 12 2003
The Iranian

This young cousin of mine is a die-hard fan of Reza Pahlavi and Iranian satellite TV stations in Los Angles. The boy was born and raised in the States and hardly speaks any Farsi but he acts like he just got here last night from Shaabdolazim. He has never been to Iran, but he knows everything and anything about Iran and its politics.

He called me last night --all excited-- and said, "Dude, the movement has started. We are free."

"What movement?"

"People are in the streets. It's over. Mullahs are history."

"You smoking crack?"

"Dude, I'm telling you. People are out there. I'm watching the Iranian satellite TV."

"That's great. What do you want me to do?"

"Man, you're the most passive individual I've ever seen. Lighten up. Victory is ours."

"So, who is leading the 'movement', huh?"

"Iranian satellite TVs. Who else?"

"God helps us all."

"Man, somebody's gotta do something, right? So the satellite TVs in LA have taken it upon themselves to lead the movement."

"Let me get this straight. These dudes are sitting in some building in Los Angles and telling people in Iran to go out in the streets and fight the mullahs?"

"Yeah. Why not?"

"Have you heard the phrase, 'LENGESH KON'?"

"No. What does it mean?"

"Never mind. So, are we done?"

"No, dog. We are not done. We are just getting started. Participation, cooperation, involvement. That's what we gotta do."

"Okay, dog. Tell you what. You wanna participate?"

"Yeah.."

"You wanna cooperate?"

"Yeah..."

"You want involvement?"

"Yeah!"

"That's cool. I'll get us both one-way tickets from LA to Tehran. We'll go back home and participate. We get in the mix and help out with the movement."

My cousin paused for a few seconds and said, "Can't do. You see, I asked this chick out the other day and we are supposed to meet next week. And then I got my finals next Monday. Oh, the boys and me are going to Cancun in two weeks. The summer vacation and all."

"What the fuck happened to participation, cooperation, involvement?"

"Ah, I got somebody on the other line. I'll call you back. Later cuz."

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