Challenging Bridget Jones

I have now begun my 6th week of dieting and haven’t cheated even once, yet...


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Challenging Bridget Jones
by Shabnam_Ghayour
17-Jun-2008
 

Week 6 of the dreaded diet:
-- Weight: STILL too depressing to mention
-- Cigarettes: 3
-- Units of Alcohol: Into the double digits, that’s all I’m saying...

My bid to pour myself into a suitably va-va-voom “Knock-em-dead” party dress for an event this summer, continues unphazed. “I’ll show him” I think… “Him” is the dreaded Ex… Breaker of hearts, king of all tale-tellers and my sole reason (initially) for embarking on a diet… In the unrealistic hope of showing him what he is missing. Fully aware that my motivation is pathetic, predictable and the embodiment of Bridget Jones herself, I carry on regardless in a flurry of blind idiocy…

Although I still hold one small pearl of wisdom that I find comforting and that is that no matter what impression I leave with The Ex, when all is said and done, it is myself I am doing this for now and no one else. And just like that… Bridget Jones has left the building.

Although I have now lost 18lbs over the past 5 weeks, I still find myself fighting the urge to unhinge my jaw and inhale copious quantities of lamb samosas, southern fried chicken, assorted cheeses and several kilos worth of spaghetti Carbonara. Yes, despite my cool and controlled exterior, I am currently awash with dangerously fat-laden food cravings, that I just cannot seem to shake off, no matter how hard I try. It just sneaks up on you from nowhere, and despite knowing full well that the cravings will leave just as quickly as they arrived, I know that if I give in to the cravings, it will cement my demise.

I admit I am having a tough week. I have now begun my 6th week of dieting and haven’t cheated even once, yet I strangely gained 1lb in my weigh-in last week. But in a completely contradictory masterstroke, my eager little (or NOT so little) body managed to shed a whopping 7lbs this week. Utterly bizarre and completely baffling. Perhaps it’s the old hormones working overtime, maybe its job stress, but I cannot seem to get some foods out of my head… no matter how hard I try!

Despite having a rather (unusually) boozy night on Friday, this hasn’t seemed to have had a negative impact on my weight loss, which again, seems strange. I am trying to put the inconsistent behaviour of my body and it’s functions behind me to try and concentrate on moving forward and distracting myself from the recent spate of strange going’s on.

I’m getting ready for a nice relaxing week-long holiday to Cyprus next week and am mentally preparing myself as well as packing strange food items to facilitate my diet whilst I’m abroad. “Toothbrush, check! Swimwear, check!” (Soya sauce, Marmite, sweet chilli sauce and Nestle Fitnesse bars…. CHECK!) I know at this point, you may have lost all respect for me, but what’s a girl to do? I have to soldier on and maintain the diet and not lose momentum, as well as kiss goodbye all the effort I have put into this whole ‘project’. It’s become a mission and I cannot fail!

Although I cannot deny that I am dreaming of Halloumi, Souvla (and Souvlaki), Keftedes, Spanokopita and absolutely anything and everything that comes out of a traditional Cypriot kitchen! Rather than go on and on, I shall do some ‘research’ whilst in Cyprus on local foods, traditions and delicacies and report back in my next instalment.

Until next time folks all I can say is “Sun, sea and s-s-s-spinach and feta cheese pastries… here I come!!”


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Well done! Reading your

by sos (not verified) on Fri Jun 20, 2008 02:12 PM PDT

Well done!

Reading your article make me to envy your will power ...I have a boyfriend who loves me for what I am and that is not helping...when I look at myself in the fitting rooms of some chic boutiques I make the decision of " starting a diet from tommorow" phrase and tomorrow begins with all the attractive and high fat and suger foods in front of my eyes...Obviously I eat them in small portions and at night before I go to sleep the guilty feeling of my weak will power gets me... and i feel like a loser...
Then I go to libarary and get some of self-help books and consolate myself and till next time of buying a new dress the positive feeling of being in peace with myself maintains...This is my diet circle and I need some help to come out of it...any suggetions?


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Shabnam jan you can do it...

by farsi (not verified) on Fri Jun 20, 2008 11:33 AM PDT

Shabnam khanoom, I must say I "LOVE" your column (this makes me a big fan) and I also happened to LOVE both "The Bridget Jones" movies... this said, I have a word of wisdom for you, "Your EX is a looser" anyone with a right mind would never let someone like you go. You should concentrate on living your life the way YOU want it not to be a slave to finding ways to get revenge. I am sure you can loose the weight you want and trust me next time find someone who wants you for what is in your head/heart not your body. As far as the smoking goes you should quit cold turkey, prove to yourself you CAN do it. 3 a day is nothing for the first few days you keep wanting it and then after that you get used to not smoking. I think what “Anonymouse “ said about smoking was hilarious… he hea heah I hope you have a fabulous time on your vacation, but watch out I usually gain a good 5lb when I go on vacation, hea heha he


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Monda

You are awsome!

by Monda on Thu Jun 19, 2008 09:13 AM PDT

Please don't forget to include some photos of your favorite dishes when you go on vacation. Your writing has way more juice than BJ's Diary writer, Sima is right. And 3 cigarettes a day is OK too, especially if you're tapering yourself off necotin for good.

I must say I do have difficulty accepting the concept of you having the Nestle fitness bar on that beach, how about fresh local fruits and fiber instead? But hey you know best.

Have a fantastic trip! And oh be your happy self around your ex, that is also a good revenge (if you need to go there, which I don't even see any reason why you should go there because any man should be so lucky if you even looked at them)!

 

 


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Shabnam joon, I know you

by fan (not verified) on Wed Jun 18, 2008 11:16 PM PDT

Shabnam joon,

I know you can do it and well done so far, keep it up and don't lose faith....

YOU CAN DO IT TO THE VERY END!

When food thoughts come to mind, and they pop up far too often and won't let go, think of the sunshine you are going to go to, think of the turquoise blue sea, think of lovely clothes, and handsome guys on the beach, go and look at yourself in the mirror, suck your stomach in and hold it in for a while, call someone, start singing really loud (if at home), go wash some delicates by hand, stick some tape over your mouth and think that it'll hurt a little if you take it off before it comes loose itself(!!),... keep your mind-
hands busy until the craving leaves you and you calm down a
little.
I've lost over 30 lbs this way and have kept it off over 19 months...Crazy and loony as it may sound, it works, just try to get the food off your mind at the time...!
All the best and have a great trip!

love, a fan


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sima

Write, write, write

by sima on Wed Jun 18, 2008 09:19 AM PDT

I have always suspected that the best revenge is to write. I'm actually mostly thinking of food craving and not the ex. What if you keep a detailed journall of all you think and feel and fantasize? Who knows where it will take you? I think if you go about it with abandon and utmost honesty something very interesting will come out of it. I'm thinking book again! Forget about Bridget Jones and that kind of pulp. I think you can do a lot better than that. Check out Sarvenaz on this website. That kind of verve and balls on the subject of food... Wow! That would be amazing.

I love reading you.


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Anonymouse

Quit smoking

by Anonymouse on Wed Jun 18, 2008 07:36 AM PDT

I quit smoking almost 10 years ago after nearly 20 years and didn't go back.  I am actually one of those who like to be near people who smoke, and encourage others to smoke so I can get second hand smoke!

Perhaps quitting cigarette is like dieting, maybe a little.  It comes back but you just think of something else and let the moment pass you by.  Maybe that will work for you next time you see a big juicy hamburger!

"Fat-laden" food?  I'd think those are the easiest kind of food to quit.  Low fat foot are still out there and I don't crave fat-laden food for a while now.  I grew up in a large household and since our grand parents were on special diet, I'm used to no-salt foods! I don't even know the difference anymore.

Is your Ex a Greek?  If so, then Greeks don't care what you do.  They are always going to matalak you anyway.  They are "born to matalak" so to speak!


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