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For peaceful purposes
27-Sep-2009
For peaceful purposes, Islamic Republic of Iran has tested two short-range missiles with a reported range of about 170 kilometers, just enough to reach Tehran from Qum, in no time. The official Islamic propaganda machine has reported that these missiles have been under development for the last several months for the sole purpose of spraying Tehran citizens with golaab in the day of appearance of Imam Zaman. At the same time, a long-range missile, Shahab-3, is also scheduled to be tested on Monday for the same peaceful purpose, to spray the occupiers of Quds with golaab at the very moment Imam Zaman appears from a well in Jamkaran.
And, only a couple of days ago, it was announced that IRI has been constructing a nuclear facility deep in a mountain range near the city of Qum. The news of this new discovery has been a shock to most of the communities that monitor Iran's effort to build a nuclear bomb, since they only knew about this location only a couple of years ago. The official Islamic news agencies have reported that this site has been under construction for the sole purpose of producing sweet water (not heavy water) for the inhabitants of Qum, since for centuries they have been drinking salty water in the desert. This sweet water will be used to produce sweet golaab, and will be stored deep inside the mountains surrounding Qum till the day Imam Zaman appears, which then this vast among of golaab will be loaded up into the short to long range missiles and will be fired in the direction of Tehran and Israel to spread the good news.
And, it was only a couple of months ago that a couple of hundreds of Iranian people were killed for peaceful purposes during the disputed election demonstrations in Iran. The sole purpose of those killings were to peacefully engrave in the brains of those dead people that IRI is a peaceful regime and there was no need for anyone to demonstrate peacefully to make a point about being peaceful. And, since the peaceful Iranians did not understand the peaceful nature of the regime; several more people were peacefully raped while in custody to render their asses, and other parts of their bodies, more peaceful.
And, it was only a decade ago that a peaceful man by the name of Dariush Forouhar was sitting with his peaceful wife in his peaceful home and was drinking a peaceful cup of hot tea when a peaceful thug by the name of Saeed Emami conspired the assassination of peaceful dissidents, and since he did not get enough satisfaction out of his peaceful activities he peacefully committed suicide in a prison by consuming vast amount of a hair removing chemical. Oogh! That must have tasted awfull. All and all more than 80 peaceful dissident writers, poets, journalists, and political activist died in the 1990's, but who is counting! It was all for peaceful purposes.
And, as if that is not enough, IRI regime has been producing cloned sheep for peaceful purposes since 2006. Do you have any idea what they do with sheep for peaceful purposes? They...how can I say it, well before test firing short range missiles and before there was a hole in a mountain near Qum for producing sweet water, Qum's water was too salty, it was so salty that it retarded Mullah's brains. At that time there was a shortage of women in Qum back then, so the big Mullahs declared that intercourse with sheep was okay as long as they were sold in the next villages. But then, since people had already eaten a lot of sodomized sheep, there was a shortage of them, so then for peaceful purposes sheep are being cloned to use their holes for peaceful purposes. Just like peaceful holes in the mountains, rapes, murders, and missiles.
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Khomeini put it better...
by NOT_AK69 on Tue Sep 29, 2009 11:07 PM PDT"A man can have sex with animals such as sheeps, cows, camels and so on. However, he should kill the animal after he has his orgasm. He should not sell the meat to the people in his own village; however, selling the meat to the next door village should be fine.”
From Khomeini's book, "Tahrirolvasyleh"AK69 WAS HERE
Karl Marx put it so well:
by Multiple Personality Disorder on Tue Sep 29, 2009 10:54 PM PDT"History repeats itself, first as tragedy, then as comedy."
So okay now, tell us again why you're so interested in Iran
by Multiple Personality Disorder on Tue Sep 29, 2009 10:49 PM PDTI know one of your professors told you to visit this site, but give me more details. Maybe you've said it elsewhere, but I don't know where. So, give me the whole story.
.
by yolanda on Wed Sep 30, 2009 06:36 AM PDT.
Who said; history repeats itself 1st as tragedy then as comedy?
by Anonymouse on Tue Sep 29, 2009 06:23 AM PDTEverything is sacred.
Dear Yolanda,
by Multiple Personality Disorder on Mon Sep 28, 2009 06:55 PM PDTThank you once again for your continued support. As you have correctly noticed many of my blogs are silly and sad at the same time, it’s because part of the fabric of our existence is that way. Take for example the former Vice President of Iran that appeared in a mass trial in his pajama! Are we supposed to laugh or cry! Cry or laugh! Or, did you know that Ayatollah Ali Khamenei personally gave his blessing for scientific research on cloning of sheep, meanwhile 4-5 decades ago the future founder of the Islamic Republic, Ayatollah Musavi Khomeini, gave his personal blessing for sodomized sheep to be sold in the next door villages. Science or stupidity? Laugh or cry? Cry or laugh! So, that’s what we are.
About golaab, sorry about that. As usual, without a proof reader, I have some typo errors. I’ll correct them once this blog falls off the Featured Blog list. Farsi speaking people knew what I was talking about. Here is a link:
//en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rose_water
Hi! MPD
by yolanda on Mon Sep 28, 2009 06:03 PM PDTYour article is very risible and sad at the same time. It gives me the ambivalent feeling. You used the word "peaceful or peacefully" 25 times, and the word is evenly distributed throughout the whole article. My favorite segment is:
Meanwhile it was only a couple of months ago that a couple of hundred of people were killed for peaceful purposes during the disputed election demonstrations in Iran. The sole purpose of those killings were to peacefully engrave in the brains of those dead people that IRI is a peaceful regime and there was no need for anyone to demonstrate peacefully to make a point about being peaceful. And since the peaceful Iranians did not understand the peaceful nature of the regime; several more people were peacefully raped while in custody to render their asses, and other parts of their bodies, more peaceful.
You are masterful at substituting the supposed words with "peaceful" or "peacefully". It is just awesome!
What is golbaab & golaab? I googled them, but I found absolutely nothing.
thanks,
P.S. I hope there is real peace in Iran and no more bloody war!!!
yolanda
"For External Use Only"
by Shazde Asdola Mirza on Mon Sep 28, 2009 06:39 PM PDTMPD dear, it is a nice, perhaps a bit angry piece; but hey, look who is talking!
Anyways, that title "For External Use Only" was placed on a rack of MOHR's in Ghom!
Apparently, those were for export only, but were "lost in translation"!
U.S. calls Iran missile tests "provocative"
by HollyUSA on Mon Sep 28, 2009 02:41 PM PDT//www.reuters.com/article/newsMaps/idUSTRE58R...
MPD, I'll let you play with that headline lol
oktaby, intellectually I would agree but that would take a lot of resources that can be put to much better use. I say we do unto them as they did unto others ;)
Dear MPD. What a great satire you have written
by Anahid Hojjati on Fri Oct 09, 2009 09:24 AM PDTMPD jan, this is excellent satire at the level of my favorite satire writers such as "Fereidoon Tonkaboni". I like what you have done with Golaab in this write-up.
MPD
by HollyUSA on Mon Sep 28, 2009 02:50 PM PDTThanks MPD. That's the 2nd time I became a 'Mother' on this site in less than 24 hours!
As for how I may do here, well let's just say mother nature was kind enough to give me a bright mind and life has thickened my skin and sharpened my claws well (again, for peaceful purposes lol)... so I think I need not worry.
Trapped? Hmmm
'I can scream through the tape you put on my lips,
Restraint doesn't matter when your soul can fly free,
Bodies alive rise from their crypts,
To open their eyes once more and see,
That the biggest trap is your own mind,
Escape isn't difficult, not even hard,
Just draw your last breath,
And trust you played the right cards.'
For peaceful purposes
by oktaby on Tue Sep 29, 2009 05:53 PM PDTEvery member of this subhuman regime must be prosecuted to the fullest extent and pursued to the farthest corners of earth and brought to justice, so any future regime will think twice before using cloned sheep as launchpads for their sexual frustration or as a preparation to rape people.
Despite the most honorable intentions for a Civil nation post islamic regime, there is no room left for South Africa style reconciliation or mercy.
Holly mother of all funnies
by Multiple Personality Disorder on Mon Sep 28, 2009 09:15 AM PDT"I invented the mean machine ...for peaceful purposes of course..." Very funny. Okay, you're trapped then. Let's see how you do.
MPD
by HollyUSA on Mon Sep 28, 2009 09:08 AM PDT'Read the poem. Thanks for the heads up buddey but I invented the mean machine ...for peaceful purposes of course LOL
Read a few more last night. Will catch up again later today. Have a good one.
Long live Makhmalbaf! Tracking Iran's Slide into Chaos Ahead of
by Anonymouse on Mon Sep 28, 2009 07:43 AM PDTGood blog MPD. I read the article below this morning and I think it also reflects the current situation very well because while the regime can hide its head under the snow like a grouse and deny everything by using force and killing and maiming, they can not deny the world stage and the shit hole they have made for themselves.
While many (including Obama) gave Ahmadi the benefit of the doubt in his first term, now no one is chopping him or his regime any onion leaves! He is nothing but a shit head now!
Tracking Iran's Slide into Chaos Ahead of Geneva Talks
//news.yahoo.com/s/time/20090928/wl_time/08599192644100
Everything is sacred.
Hello Holly,
by Multiple Personality Disorder on Mon Sep 28, 2009 07:32 AM PDTYou have not been here a whole week yet, so I suggest you read this poem first:
Welcome Alene
Make sure you play the music too for special sound effect, and then try to get out of this machine as fast as you can, if it's not already too late. But, I'm afraid it is, it's already been six days.
Glad to discover you MPD
by HollyUSA on Sun Sep 27, 2009 11:59 PM PDTHey I just came across your Eharmony piece (FAAAAN-F'ING-TASTIC) and now this. You are one enormously talented individual. Keep writing...I'll go read your other posts :)