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And so the name calling begins... Are we brave enough to stop it?

With the relaunch of iranian.com, a new beginning of sorts, I had vowed to not sink into the mire of what had plagued the previous iteration of this site, namely the bad mouthing and name calling, the vile and viciousness, and the all too unproductive discourse that we used to think is freedom of speech.

 

Absent of mutual respect, labelling, namecalling, and the general all too easy temptation of "Hal-Geery" has sadly been our main cultural trait.

 

Our "Nom de Fume" if you will. I had hoped it would be different this time around.

 

Recently on the inncentest of comments I made on the Persian/Asiatic Cheetah/Leopard story, I posted my own 2 cents. Which is my right. The MOST optimistic and innocent addiiotn to the largely educational information porvided. EASILY verified by the link I provided.

 

Yet a commentor, seeing and seizing the usual opportunity for exacting  a scratch that might elicit the blood of a fellow Iranian that they were thirstily looking for, called me a "Pseudo Expert" with the snarky sarcastic supporting text to go with it.

 

As insults go, I've receieved far worse. Trust me. But that was then, and this was now. with the new site, the enw hope and so on, I had quietly prayed I would not see it re-appears. So Imagine my sadness when it did. Right on schedule, right on time, right on the very mark of a nerve it surgically intended to strike.

 

How sad!

 

Folks, let us re-resolve in this new year approaching, NOT to resort to this kind of ugly and divisive tone. Let us give each other the benefit of the doubt. When one of us says something another thinks is wrong, definitely object to, and offer your counter opinion and correction whenever necessary, but please please please do so with the respect and courtesy that educated and proper adults in a civilized world normally afford each other.

 

Be polite. We will get much farther on the evolutionary curve that way.

 

I'm here, I'm not going anywhere, I'm certainly not going to storm off over one stupid comment.

 

But I thought (and had hoped) we had grown. This new site affords us the rare chance to develop that growth even more. Let us put aside the tempting put downs, and salacious oneupsmanship that has kept us from anti-dialoguing with each other sanley and productively.

 

Let us maintain our cool under scrutiny, our courage to counter-argue, and defend our convictions with passion BUT the courtesy and respect we would show our Mothers.

 

This is a "Door Moment". We can choose to stay on the old side, in the dark chamber of desperation, lashing out in a futile last gasp of self absorption. Or enter a bright new room full of hope, optimism, and the respect that positive future thinkers afford those brave enough to grasp the ring.

 

Happy Holidays, Happy New Year.

 

B

Balatarin

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BB

Mr. B

As a final comment on allowing writers to block comments they don't like, let me warn against this. As you can see some comments on this piece have been blocked. It looks like it might be me doing it. But it wasn't. If you look it will say blocked by admin etc. That is not me. But since I have been given that power, it could be. This nebulous who done it, is what I object to.

As I said, I will NEVER block any comment on ANY of my pieces, post anything you want, if you attack me unwarranted, expect a response, or not, depending on how much it hurt my feelings and ego.

That is healthy dialogue, not wondering who's watching what commenter for what might be construed as offensive.

This system does not work, the site is sanitized by a mistaken policy, that goes against every sensible concept of what responsible free speech is.

OK so we can't have everything (where would we put it?), and this iteration of Iranian.com is the best one yet in my opinion, but this particular design flaw is a strategy mistake, and will create many more problems, than the simple one it originally intended to solve.

Again, comment all you want, good or bad. If your comment is deleted, know that it wasn't me. Even though I can't prove it.

QBT

EsfandAashena

Esfand Aashena

Come on just admit it, you want to fan the chaos. As Jack Nicholson said in Few Good Men; You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you WANT me on that wall -- you NEED me on that wall!

You're saying that you're goody two-shoe thinking it's a compliment! Bottom line you're either a responsible person which means you shoud monitor and moderate your blog, or irresponsible which means you need adult supervision in the form of an Editor.

esfand

esfand Cho Iran nabashad, tane man mabad

thank you for your blog. when I first read it, there were 0 replies, now I see there are almost 200 and most of them are nothing but pure Irani-bazi.. "you said that, so I do this....then you said that, so take this", stuck in an infinite loop. i'm not surprised one bit

This comment was removed by the Iranian.com Staff for violating our Commenting Standards

faramarz

Faramarz

Doctor Jaan,
Since Trita and I are both worried about the shortage of medicine in Iran, are you ok with your supply of Niagra, or do you want a re-fill?
I can get get an emergency waiver from the State Department and overnight a package to you!

Roozbeh_Gilani

Roozbeh_Gilani "Personal business must yield to collective interest."

Not sure if I should venture back to this blog, in case I get accused of being Issa masih too , so soon after his B'day! But I am thinking of setting up a purely apolitical , all inclusive "iranian.com Doctors and Mohandes" Society. Anybody interested?

This comment was removed by the Iranian.com Staff for violating our Commenting Standards

Roozbeh_Gilani

Roozbeh_Gilani "Personal business must yield to collective interest."

Sure, we can always incorporate some nakedness and debauchery into the ICDMS (IC Doctor Mohandes Society). The Charter and Logo should reflect the apolitical nature of the society as well as the society's obvious Engineering routes. The society will be dedicated to all the hard working Iranian fathers who invested their livelihood into sending their sons and daughters to farangestaan , for them to become Doctors and Mohandeses.....

Mehrban

Mehrban

Did we lose the Venerable Doctor Mohandes, our only blogger from Iran? I hope not, he was recently reinstalled.

EsfandAashena

Esfand Aashena

He is not "our only blogger from Iran" but he was blocked more often than anyone else in the previous i.com. Some of his previous user names were KouroshS, Dr. Mohandes, Johny Dollar, etc.

This comment was removed by the Iranian.com Staff for violating our Commenting Standards

EsfandAashena

Esfand Aashena

Not "blocked the longest" but blocked "more often" than anyone else. Lets see how long perry cox will last.

This comment was removed by the Iranian.com Staff for violating our Commenting Standards

maziar58

maziar 58 Maziar

I'm glad none of my American Iranian kids
can read farsi.....
what a shame?

AshkanJahani

AshkanJahani Nietzche summed it best.

It's a bloody shame this all happened on Christmas Eve. Some consideration you lot have. The young man adds a few decent things to the site and gets people pondering, and you had to chase him away. Shame on you both. He wasn't right for stooping to your level but you both know you were wrong. It's damn near ironic that Bahmani writes this piece on going forward, being one, helping each other out, and being civilized for f*** sake and this just spirals out of control. You lot should be proud of yourselves. You people need to digest Bahmani's words. No matter what flavour someone's political thoughts are, respect them and respond like a civilized person.

We all saw the effects of this kind of behavior during the revolution. No one had freedom of political thought. The moment the people began expressing themselves, a government came to power that quelled all freedom of expression. This is our Iranian pride. This is what we'll be starting 2013 with.

A real bloody shame, it is.

SaidAmin

Saïd Amin Saïd Amin is a tech entrepreneur born in Tehran, Iran. He is the founder/CEO of World Singles Networks, a leading provider of niche online dating services and the Publisher of Iranian.com.

as i have mentioned before, we'll have a revised terms policy (aka what is not acceptable behavior) once the new layout with categories and featured content is up; this will probably take a month or two as there's also a litany of bugs and new features that also need to be worked on.

you have been empowered with a "block" button and the ability to remove comments as you see fit. you are obviously free to exercise your right to use these features. also, duplicate profiles will continue to be banned - repeat offenders will be banned for good. abusive behavior will also lead to a ban, and appreciate that we all have our own thresholds for defining what is or is not abusive. a stated formal policy will help clarify any blurry lines w/ where the site stands.

with that said, many of the exchanges in this thread are absolutely unacceptable. as a result, some of the comments are being removed and a few members are now suspended. when adults act like children, they will be treated as such and i frankly don't care who started it. an eye for an eye leaves everybody blind.

BB

Mr. B

Thanks Said jan. I know you have put a lot into this project and I will try to nip ANY kind of pointless destruction in the bud.

Re Comments and Block control. I vehemently disagree with putting the block button in my hands. The ego is powerful and especially writers sometimes need to hear the painful truth. Allowing writers to censor their own valuable comments is dangerous. Someone needs to police the comments and monitor for site policy violation, but I will NEVER delete ANY comments made on my posts.

EsfandAashena

Esfand Aashena

Bahmani you don't make any sense. You complain about people abusing each other which has become "our main cultural trait" (your words) yet you don't want to take any responsibility for it yourself.

You are responsible for your own blogs and contributions and what goes on in them. If you allow bunch of people to go at it while you sit back and enjoy it and then write a blog complaining about it while do nothing about it then your words mean nothing, at least nothing to me.

You are no better, actually exactly the same, than the people you're complaining about. You like it but don't want to admit it, which makes you a hypocrite.

Use the delete and block options or forever hold your peace.

Albaloo

Albaloo

They are calling themselves the opposition abroad !

AshkanJahani

AshkanJahani Nietzche summed it best.

143 comments and counting!

You bloody children are still at it? Leave the kid alone, and to the young man, leave the two sour dinosaurs alone. All this on the bloody internet for f*** sake.

Albaloo

Albaloo

The two sour dinosaurs were banned on the old IC and now I know why?

choghok

choghok Your enemie's enemy is necessarily not a friend.

You are pointing to a very important thing. I feel that this problem is deep rooted into our culture. We are very quick to judge and also very good in creating plots and conspiracy theories in our heads.

I think (my own conspiracy theory) also there are some few that are here as some kind of agents for a specific political group or country. They are here to create unrest and maybe gather information.

I think all real Iranians who love their country and want to make it better should follow few simple rules:

1. Do not attack a person, argue for your view by logic and examples. Character murder is for IRI and other weak dictatorships.
2. If the other person is disrespectful in any way, do not reply in kind. Just report his posting. If we all do that then after a while people will see a change in the community. I assure you nobody reading the chain will think bad of you if you keep your cool. On the contrary.
3. Support anyone you see being attacked personally even if you do not agree with the person. Supporting a fellow member means that we grow as community.

mousa67

mousa67 offering free psychotherapy sessions to those suffering from potentialy suicidal mental condition known as "islamism"

wow, see what happens when i step out for a few hours to take my puppy chiwawas hasan and husein for a walk round the central park?!
bahmani joonam, i like you for many things, mostly because you are the spitting image of jason king. but why did you have to start this for allah's sake?
brother & sister shiats; i am really puzzled that you are so obsessed with me & my identity, while your beloved asad and islamic republic are falling apart right in front of your eyes!. after all, i thought i was already exposed by non other than yourselves as "fred's cousine", and a "mosad agent"! plus since joining this site two weeks or so ago, what crime have i committed apart from you dragging my mother out of her grave and make her the object of the desire of these "young american shiats" like al dayus? now if someone calls himself a profane name like "dayus", is it also my fault? is my girlfriend's name and previous professions also my fault?
i really think that it is time for everyone to hold hand, shout alla o akabar, khamenei rahbar and take a deep dive in the nearset ice cold river to cool off a bit!
LOL

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

You're right, let's all do our voozooh and ask Allah for forgiveness, starting with you.

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

LOL, that bald guy in my avatar wasn't me. That was a picture of Siavash Ghomeishi. What kind of a Persian are you?

Kyle6

Doctor Mohandes Beware. BS detector onboard!

"write the sentence how you would write it"
and there is nothing ruuuung veeeet what you write??

Somebody get me a shovel, i need some sh,...unloaded out of someone here.

Kyle6

Doctor Mohandes Beware. BS detector onboard!

As pergerezz???
No, sorry. I will not consider your request.
I will let you wallow in arrogance and self-centredness. wallow dude,. wallow in it. get it all over you.

Kyle6

Doctor Mohandes Beware. BS detector onboard!

Exactly what you idiot?
i hate to imagine if it were your mom or sister who had to depend on you to be saved!! god know where they would end up

AshkanJahani

AshkanJahani Nietzche summed it best.

Don't leave over this meaningless rubbish!

If you're leaving, do I have permission to copy your blogs and keep them posted here? They were nice reading material and I still haven't finished digesting them.

AshkanJahani

AshkanJahani Nietzche summed it best.

Are you sure? If you're going then can I take your writing and post it myself? I think some of your articles (Balkanization and the identity crisis one) are really important. Let the clamouring subside. Think about it before leaving. But if you are 100% sure, let me know right now if I can keep your stuff posted on my blog.

AshkanJahani

AshkanJahani Nietzche summed it best.

E-mail me. ashkanyan@ymail.co.uk

I have to ask you a couple questions before you leave, about your writing. I might want to include it as a piece in my political blog. Take a glass of cold water and come back to this site after Christmas. You don't need to leave. Don't ever get this upset over a bloody internet scuffle. You practically let these two run all over you and pull you in every which way. You need to let people like this "roll of your shoulders", in Jay-Z's words. You need to think twice. You write like a bloody political analyst and you let a couple of trolls on the net get to you? Come on, now...

Think about my offer.

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

Ok, I will.

But I'm still leaving this site. Iraniya aslan motahed nistan. To avoid trouble and their own loss of aberoo they won't stand up against people who are WRONG. Isn't this what Zoroastrianism is about? The right path? Isn't this also in the Qur'an? To fight against injustice wherever one sees it? Pathetic. ALL OF YOU.

I'm done. Thanks again for standing up for me. I'll shoot you an email, Ashkan.

Kyle6

Doctor Mohandes Beware. BS detector onboard!

i HAD already won
Dude. fact chance of this being over.
u can quit like a chicken shit that you are.
Turned me off!!! come up with a correct sentece you dumbass moron.
U started it.
Piss off.

Kyle6

Doctor Mohandes Beware. BS detector onboard!

Bi namoose e bi shoor.

Ham dayussi ham ozgal ham bi namoos.

AshkanJahani

AshkanJahani Nietzche summed it best.

If you see this is how he is, then leave him be. You seem to want to continue it as well. (facepalm)

mousa67

mousa67 offering free psychotherapy sessions to those suffering from potentialy suicidal mental condition known as "islamism"

i much prefered your previous user name, "dayus". you were being honest for once. LOL

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

I'll use my name from now on. By the way, do communists celebrate the holidays?

Kyle6

Doctor Mohandes Beware. BS detector onboard!

I will use My "real" name from now on esse.

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

LOL, this was over a couple hours ago. Did you finish your Christmas celebration and come back to the lap top in anticipation? Let it go. Your English is horrible, and the fact that you haven't lived in America long enough shows in your inability to understand colloquial talk.

And what's with the Mexican references?

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

I love how you say I have bad English and yet someone here pointed out TWICE that there's nothing wrong with my English and that you are imagining things.

Don't make me call the Basij agents on you, man. LOL

choghok

choghok Your enemie's enemy is necessarily not a friend.

Sayyad Don't let this mousad67 go into your head and do not sink to his level.

mousa67

mousa67 offering free psychotherapy sessions to those suffering from potentialy suicidal mental condition known as "islamism"

i have no ideas what comies do on holidays, but i do know what me and my gf zuzu joon are gona do tonight my honey pot. and she might now, a_rash/dayus/sayyad/....joonam!
btw, you do like older men dont you, first DM, then me! LOL

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

I'm not like you, Roozbeh/Mousa67. But keep your butthole vacant, I'm not done yet.

mousa67

mousa67 offering free psychotherapy sessions to those suffering from potentialy suicidal mental condition known as "islamism"

a_rash/dayus/akadarya joonam: which lunatic assylum did you scape from? LOL

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

Oni ke pedareto toosh gayidam kos keshe avazi

Kyle6

Doctor Mohandes Beware. BS detector onboard!

oppsiii daisy.

my!my! we gotta a potty mouth in the house.

mousa67

mousa67 offering free psychotherapy sessions to those suffering from potentialy suicidal mental condition known as "islamism"

a_rash/dayus/akadarya/niloofarparsi joonam: my dad says thank you! LOL

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

Are midonestam to bigheyrati! Hala nobate toam miyad, koon pareh!

mousa67

mousa67 offering free psychotherapy sessions to those suffering from potentialy suicidal mental condition known as "islamism"

a_rash/dayus/akadarya/niloofar joon joonam: my dad says now turn over baby!
LOL

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

You need some better comebacks ma man... you're starting to slip up. Play the Islamist card again, it seems like that's your weapon of choice.

Kyle6

Doctor Mohandes Beware. BS detector onboard!

it is "slip" you are starting to slip, mr. hotshot.

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

You can say "slip up". Listen, you really don't know common English. There's a difference between how people TALK and how people write official documents. It's not like Farsi where even blog writing assumes a ketabi form.

mousa67

mousa67 offering free psychotherapy sessions to those suffering from potentialy suicidal mental condition known as "islamism"

a_rash/dayus/akadarya/niloofar joon joonam, as we used to say in the old country:
بچه رو که میخی‌ راضی‌ کنی‌، باید با چوچولش بازی کنی‌.

من فلان دارم با چوچولت بازی می‌کنم بچه نیاکی تپل مپل.

لال الف لال

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

مصح جان، اگر دائمن فکرت به کیر بقیه است که وقت برای بعس منطقی نه خواهی دشت
دهنت را سرویس کردم و بیشتر هم خاهم کرد، سپاس گذارم، بکن ننت.

mousa67

mousa67 offering free psychotherapy sessions to those suffering from potentialy suicidal mental condition known as "islamism"

نیلوفر آرش دیوس جونم! ببینم نکنه تو همون تریتا فارسی باشی‌ با لب گلچینش.

دارم با چوچولت بازی می‌کنم ها؟

لال الف لال.

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

LOL I'm sure the head of a lobby is going to come argue with a bache mahal like you. You really think you're important. Alright that's it. You've made me so mad I'm going to call Ahmadinejad right now and tell him.

Kyle6

Doctor Mohandes Beware. BS detector onboard!

or was it GR in the rear end??:)))))

Kyle6

Doctor Mohandes Beware. BS detector onboard!

"the head of a lobby is going to come argue"

LOL
And you were the 95th percentile in what INTERNATIONAL exam?? Geer Rreee eree??

sayyad.shaer

Sayyad Sha'er visit: www.sayyadshaer.com

I think you really have a problem understanding the difference between conversational/colloquial language and proper, textbook language. Either that or the English Textbooks you use to "teach your students" were bought from the .99c store. You pick sentences with NO errors in them and insist there are errors. You're quite a character. Perhaps language isn't your forte, you are, after all, an engineer by profession.

mousa67

mousa67 offering free psychotherapy sessions to those suffering from potentialy suicidal mental condition known as "islamism"

نگران خامنه‌ای نباش بچه نیاکی. آبجیت اونجا هست در خدمت دربار! بیا اینجا پیش عمو موسات نیلوفر ناز نازی فارسی.

لال الف لال

AshkanJahani

AshkanJahani Nietzche summed it best.

Leave the bloke alone. You ought to be ashamed of yourself. Half of the people on this site block you or laugh at you.