رضا پهلوی در ملاقات خصوصی با دالائی لاما

 

نمایشی در یک پرده.

رضا پهلوی: نامستا

دالائی لاما: نخیر، هنوز چیزی نماسیده!

رضا: ولی‌ مامان گفته بود که با شما حساب کرده.

لاما: اون فقط حق ویزیت بود … مصاحبه علی‌ حد‌ه است.

رضا: چشم، مامان بیاد بهتون میده.

لاما: اوّل اسکناس، دوم التماس!

رضا ناراحت و پکر به‌طرف تابلوی عکس رضا شاه میرود، و بادقت آنرا کنار میزند؛ تا گاو صندوق بزرگی‌ نمایان شود. سپس، رمز را وارد می‌کند: ۲۵۳۷.

در گاو صندوق باز میشود ... ولی‌ ناگهان مقداری گرد سفید و لوله و سرنگ، بیرون میریزد. رضا دستپاچه توضیح میدهد.

رضا: ببخشید، خرت و پرت‌های خواهرمه … البته ایشون تقریبا ترک کرده‌اند!

لاما: مواظب باش مثل اون دو تای دیگه نشه!

رضا: بفرمائید، اینهم مبلغ ناقابل.

لاما: زکی، اینکه پول یه جفت دمپایی تازه هم نمیشه!

رضا: شرمنده … اینهم خدمت تون برای دمپایی.

لاما: خوب، حالا من چی‌ باید بگم؟

رضا: که من دالائی لامای ایران هستم.

لاما: زرشک!

رضا: بله آقا؟

لاما: منظورم اینه که زرشک خوب این روزا کیلویی چنده؟

رضا: بفرمائید … اینهم پول زرشک تازه، مرغ بریون و برنج باسماتی.

لاما: چأییدی!

رضا: ببخشید؟

لاما: آب دماغت آویزنه … مثل اینکه چأییدی.

رضا: وای … تورو خدا … منو دالائی لاما بکن دیگه!

لاما: باشه، حالا که اینقدر دلت میخواد ... بخواب تا مراسم تحلیف رو شروع کنیم.

Balatarin
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Shazde Asdola Mirza @ShazdeAsdolaMirza

I've been writing Persian Short Stories since 2008. Some are sweet and some bitter; all are fictional, yet honest reflections on the ever changing Iranian lives. My archived stories are at: http://iranian.com/main/member/shazde-asdola-mirza.html

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SiamakZand3

Siamak Zand

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Shazdeh jan,While you were enjoying the previliges of being a "Shazdeh" In the west,yours truly was being called a Shazdeh back in Iran up to 3 years ago(dar mahafel dowr manghal).No matter how hard I tried to convice the "Doochstan"that I was not decended from Karim Khan Zand,"Nagholaha"never told me the true reason for calling me a "Shazdeh" :)

ShazdeAsdolaMirza

Shazde Asdola Mirza I've been writing Persian Short Stories since 2008. Some are sweet and some bitter; all are fictional, yet honest reflections on the ever changing Iranian lives. My archived stories are at: http://iranian.com/main/member/shazde-asdola-mirza.html

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David dear,
Again a reactive stand towards the Shah Ollahi is required, because just by smelling the possibility of change in Iran, this group of last genertion's Savak torturers and murderers are getting excited, to go back and exterminate all the Muslims, Leftists and Moderates ... and have a Purim style dance over their corpses (after eating the Ears of course).
Regarding the personal issues, if the Pahlavi can't even manage their personal affairs, what can they do as new Shah? If their only ability comes from Petro$$$ taken by the daddy, what good can they generate for Iran?
This Pahlavi fanfare is not worthy of Iranian's attention and hope. Shah is passe, Mullah is going, Iran needs to look forward not back.

ShazdeAsdolaMirza

Shazde Asdola Mirza I've been writing Persian Short Stories since 2008. Some are sweet and some bitter; all are fictional, yet honest reflections on the ever changing Iranian lives. My archived stories are at: http://iranian.com/main/member/shazde-asdola-mirza.html

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Dear David,
My stand towards Reza Pahlavi is a reactive one, i.e. when the Shah Ollahi ask for him to be crowned and be declared the Dalai Lama or Nelson Mandela of Iran, I feel the need to vent some of his hot air out.
Let's remember that what has made all the great democracies (from Greece and Rome to Britain and USA) great, has been the ability of people to question and even satire their "glorious leaders", so that they don't turn into self-rightous dictators.
Have a look at the American political satire shows and see how every hour of every day, they cut their leaders to size.

DavidET

David ET خواستار ایرانی‌ جدا دین و مردم سالار (سکولار دموکرات) بر مبنای بیانیه جهانی‌ حقوق بشر. http://www.facebook.com/iranseculargroup?ref=hl

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Like i said in another commentary the issue is not critic or making satire but the basijee cultural style if it. The shots taken are PERSONAL NOT POLITICAL. IR will collapse one day but the culture that brought it is what we need to abolish hezbollahi shollahi or whatever . Brst wishes.

DavidET

David ET خواستار ایرانی‌ جدا دین و مردم سالار (سکولار دموکرات) بر مبنای بیانیه جهانی‌ حقوق بشر. http://www.facebook.com/iranseculargroup?ref=hl

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With all due respect i do not get the point of this low quality ir style blog by getting so personal. I am no monarchist but trying to trash one of the secular democrat opposition leaders as such is not called for. Getting so many toops also is a proof of why we still are where we are. ...i suppose i am a minority on this opinion..

P.Galenous

P_J. An Iranian!

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David,

Politicians, in free world, are the bot of jokes, in print media, internet and television. If they can’t take the heat TOUGH! Then they should get out of the kitchen! Iran and Iranians have already been sick and tired of the tyranny of the either the degenerate inferior “King(s)” or the out of whack “Supreme Leader(s)”. Humor is the only thing that brings these psychos down to their human level. Don’t forget that they are considered “Public Servant(s)” for a reason; In Iran they called themselves “Government Servants” and that is/was completely wrong giving these egotistical overblown character more ammunition to RULE!

We have been burned enough time, that by now, we ought to be smart enough, not be conned by these spoiled egotistical characters…don't froget that they serve us, we don’t serve them!

DavidET

David ET خواستار ایرانی‌ جدا دین و مردم سالار (سکولار دموکرات) بر مبنای بیانیه جهانی‌ حقوق بشر. http://www.facebook.com/iranseculargroup?ref=hl

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there are quality movies, average movies and trash movies. If i question the quality or purpose of a movie, that does not mean i am against movoes. I might even be a movie fan.

IRANLOVESISRAEL

IRANLOVESISRAEL Shlomo would love to entertain you and your significant other at his Kabab-Hammoom parlor in your next trip to Tel Aviv.

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Shazdeh jan chetori? I think you need to take a vacation and go where it's warm - isn't Toronto -50 degrees? I tell you what, take a trip to Tel Aviv. It's in the 70's, sunny, and nice. I can show you all the nice spots there. :-)

ShazdeAsdolaMirza

Shazde Asdola Mirza I've been writing Persian Short Stories since 2008. Some are sweet and some bitter; all are fictional, yet honest reflections on the ever changing Iranian lives. My archived stories are at: http://iranian.com/main/member/shazde-asdola-mirza.html

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Shlomo jan,
You are 100% right ... as usual.
How much I need a vacation, from the madness! But every time that I think I have left it all behind, some thing drags me in.
But that's life, and we can't deny it ... some people get their kicks from dreams.
Then again, we can't quite it, can we? Let's pick up ourselves and get back into the race, cause this world keeps spinning around.
This is to a fine Chelo-Kabab in sunny Tel Aviv:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRoI1BC32jQ

maziar58

maziar 58 Maziar

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SAM Khan
You Need a vacation for sure Nurooz is coming!
Khosh be halet ke Pass IRR darid
I couldn't Attend My Father's Burial !
* Disclaimer to all
You can be Left, Right,atheist,Monarch..........
Or Non of the Above ;As long as we're all from Iran
You're Respected in my Book.

ShazdeAsdolaMirza

Shazde Asdola Mirza I've been writing Persian Short Stories since 2008. Some are sweet and some bitter; all are fictional, yet honest reflections on the ever changing Iranian lives. My archived stories are at: http://iranian.com/main/member/shazde-asdola-mirza.html

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Dear Maziar,
"The wicked have no rest!"
First time I heard that was from a nice British lady, who was very easy going and jolly. She thought that I was too much of a workaholic (even at 25), and made me a point of that old saying.
Sorry to hear of your loss, and that you could not attend the memorial service for your father. However, I have seen many people (with very strange histories) who have got their Iranian Pass, that it seems not to be very difficult.
One funny case, that I witnessed in the Canadian consult (while it was still open), was a young man who had fled Iran illegally. The consult had processed his case and was ready to issue him a visa, but were asking for $100 extra fee for his prior illegal exit from Iran. The young man was arguing that he shouldn't be paying that charge, because he had alreay paid 10 times that amount to a smuggler to take him to Pakistan!

ShazdeAsdolaMirza

Shazde Asdola Mirza I've been writing Persian Short Stories since 2008. Some are sweet and some bitter; all are fictional, yet honest reflections on the ever changing Iranian lives. My archived stories are at: http://iranian.com/main/member/shazde-asdola-mirza.html

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"mohamad razavi": see my following responses to similar questions and comments below.
By the way, use you real nickname ... using a brand-new Muslim sounding nick doesn't fool anyone!

M.Razavi

mohamad razavi

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Now what kind of a response is that shazdeh assdola?
"see my following responses to similar questions".
If We had not read your previous rants on this site we'd assume that you are indeed a Qajar prince about to claim your throne!
And the more you dislike the comments which are not praising you, the more you prove my point.

M.Razavi

mohamad razavi

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Shazde Asdola, they dont call you the leader of the wind party on this site for no reason! Friend, in one blog alone you first attack Reza pahlavi, his mother and his sister with most vulgar language, and then respond to one of his supporters by saying you like RP and his mother! So what is the deal man? I am no psychologist , but can sense strong need for attention and love on your side! Take it from me friend, you can not be loved by everyone. Trying to please all, could in the end of the day lead to being hated by all!
p.s. Dont want to break your heart any further, but you are not funny. Not even a tiny, weeny bit.

SamSamVI

SamSam VI Path of Kiaan Ressurection of true Iran Hoisting Drafsheh Kaviaan

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Monseur Asdolla Mirza;, I know u r in the habit of deleting legit comments so kindly give your Al Ahmad -stalinist censors a rest & let this one go ;).

I reckon you are no fan of Reza Diba(Pahlavi) for personal reasons. Heck me too to an extent, but definitly not for the same reasons that irk you off. For me, he is too much of a sabzo-pashmi greenist/humanist and too far to the left..much less kiaan-centric(if anything at all) than his late father Shahanshah which may actualy work in his favour since Iranians in general are collectively less nationalistic & more humanistic and as such feel more comfortable with Al Shaikh Attar/Hafiz than with great Ferdowsi ..kinda like a Sufi prince . Yet for you for obvious reasons he represents the far right of the jahanvatani/humanist centre and a legacy of his father.
Now my question to you is the reasons behind your grudge against his dad. Is it because your family had a great paying job in his imperial Army, living in posh north Tehran as you said so yourself?. Is it because you could afford to live your young years in the life of luxury in North American colleges drinking vodka, Gin & Tonic and hang around as you said with both opposition groupies(shaikhists & commies) & pro-regime crowd of sefaratis?..

So what gives man?..Do you always burn the hand that feeds you or is it some thing far far deeper like an Ethno-Social cause which in that case I definitly understand & sympathise with. You see Mr Asdolla, I sympathise because I,m the exact opposite of you ..My idols are Ferdowsi, Cyrus & Khosru Parviz.. Yours are Shariatti, Al Ahmad & Al Hafiz hence you see the cause behind your rage against anything that reminds you of the Pahlavis & "shahe setamgar"(eventhough in my opinion moderatly pro-kiaan). Yet even that little was too much for your type. I think I got it right & wrapped it to the point. Didn,t I, Monseur Asdolla?.

Cheers & Remember there is room for everybody under the roof of Motherland Iran. The land is not yours & your type only. Live & let live man!!!

ShazdeAsdolaMirza

Shazde Asdola Mirza I've been writing Persian Short Stories since 2008. Some are sweet and some bitter; all are fictional, yet honest reflections on the ever changing Iranian lives. My archived stories are at: http://iranian.com/main/member/shazde-asdola-mirza.html

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Samsam:
An honest question deserves an honest answer.
One of my family members and one of my friends were jailed and tortured by the Shah's Savak. That was a major blow to my view towards that regime.
However, the new regime has done 10 times worse!
I am afraid what the next one will do.
God save us all.

Zendanian

Zendanian An injury to one is an injury to all.

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میرزا جان با درود و صبحت بخیر،
استاد عزیز همانگونه که حتما خود شما نیز مطلع می باشید، حدود هفتاد، هشتاد سال پیش نیما یوشیج در نامه ی اشاره کرده بود به برخورد نوینش در شعر پارسی و چگونه این حرکت وی مانند " آب در خوابگه مورچگان ریختن" تمامی اطرافیانش را از خوابی طولانی پرانده بود.
حالا شده حکایت طنز گزنده و شیرین شما و جماعت از خواب پریده در "نبض ایرانیان" دات کام!
دمت گرم و سرت خوش باد.

ShazdeAsdolaMirza

Shazde Asdola Mirza I've been writing Persian Short Stories since 2008. Some are sweet and some bitter; all are fictional, yet honest reflections on the ever changing Iranian lives. My archived stories are at: http://iranian.com/main/member/shazde-asdola-mirza.html

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Zendanian jan,
You are simply too kind!
Here is my favorite Nima (and actually Shajarian) piece:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRAZd88ECF8

Zendanian

Zendanian An injury to one is an injury to all.

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کمال همنشین در من اثر کرد

وگرنه من همان خاکم که هستم