Letters

June 8, 2004

* Ass-wipe commies

Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
I've been around for a long, long year
Stole many a man's soul and faith
And I was 'round when Jesus Christ
Had his moment of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that pilate
Washed his hands and sealed his fate
Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name

1) Name: Mak *@#$%#^& (AKA General Xerxes)
2) Age: 44
3) Education: B.S.E.E, M.S.E.E, D.Sc.E.E
4) Work History: MITRE Corporation, GTE Laboratories, Bell Labs, Lucent Technologies, Onex Communications, Boeing Company
5) Hometown: Boston
6) Place of birth: Karadj
7) Political inclination: Anti islamist, anti communist, anti bacheh akhoonds, anti bacheh kommonist
8) Size of balls: As big as Roozbeh's head and his comrades'. Combined!

As my beloved president Reagan used to say, here we go again, God rest his soul! Another "rebel without a cause then, old fart without a cause now" is teaching us about democracy and how bad things were in Iran prior to the biggest mass-suicide of the history of mankind (e.g., the revolution.)

I am going to let my dear colleagues (e.g., Mr. Parviz Parkhash and Ambassador Hakimi) to offer their proper response to this goon (Roozbeh) since debate is not one of my strongest suits [Watch out for Iranicons]. However, I am going to provide some facts about the contributions made by the Pahlavi regime and some of the accomplishments of that era.

Fact 1) In 1979, there were 1000's of students at Harvard, MIT, Tufts, Northeastern, BU, BC, etc. just in Boston pursuing their education in various fields sponsored by the Department of Education of the Imperial Iranian Government and partially due to the economic strength of Iran in that time. Today, the Iranian youth are forced to prostitution, drug abuse or are in jails!? Most likely, Roozbeh's folks in Iran are involved with narcotic trafficking or maybe they resort to being Jakesh to make the ends meet!

Fact 2) In 1976, the Imperial Iranian Air Force had placed orders to purchase 160 F16s increasing that fleet to 300 by 1980. All that effort was to protect the sorry asses of the kinds of Roozbeh and the rest of the ass-wipe commies. South Korea, a country which ranked economically below Iran in those days has just placed orders for such planes in 2002.

Fact 3) The establishment of birth certificate goes back to the 1920's during the reign of Reza Shah The Great. Before that era, people used to engrave the names of their children on the rear end of their goats, sheep, donkeys or other life stocks. Roozbeh's ancestor's names were most likely written on the back of Qor'ANN since books on communism were not that popular back then!!?

Fact 4) Before the inauguration of Karadj Dam in 1962, people used to store drinking water in the underground storage called Aabbambar. In fact, late at night people would get around the neighborhoods to watch nobody would Shash in the water stream which was used as drinking water. The distribution of water and the plumbing facilities were all established in the 1960's. I bet you Roozbeh's folks used to rely upon Camel urine!?

Fact 5) The late Shah of Iran for some odd reasons decided to enhance the Imperial Iranian Civil Aviation with supersonic Concord airplanes in the early 1970's to carry the sorry asses of the incompetent and unappreciative ass-wipes such as Roozbeh's? Beats me!

Fact 6) Prior to 1979, Iranian tourists, students, citizens were treated with respect all around the world. It was an honor to be from the Imperial Iran. Now, it is a shame to call yourself an Iranian. Of course, for folks like Roozbeh honor is irrelevant since Ayatollah Khomeini confiscated their honor by "Gaayeed" their mothers 25 years ago!!!!!!

The list of the contributions goes on and on...

As for you Roozbeh, you are simply and deadly wrong on all accounts. I bet you, you belong to the Group C category of Iranians!?! I am a living proof to let you know that I saw it all with my own eyes and I frankly don't give a fuck whose nocheh you happen to be?

Genaral Xerxes,

God Bless Iran, Shah, George Bush, and America

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June 8

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