Souri

Oh my, oh my - how I'd love to keep all my promises ;-)

Stop it please

You just want more attention Shazdeh.

You know well that I am not the author of that comment nor any other comment addressed to you.Everybody knows that I don't have any other account.

Stop it. I won't answer you  anymore. Don't forget that you made a promise to me, just one week ago.

Have fun with your fans and stay away from me. It is better for you.

Souri: I can respect your wish but you should also stop

threatening me and slandering me with unfounded accusations, as that can be a real crime.

I now recall the chat room comment that you are most possibly referring to. It was made after an attack on my blog by "mahi siah koochooloo", which means little-black-fishie, and I believed was a new nickname you were using. That attack is copied below. My comment in chat room is not worth a dime, otherwise, you would have already published it all over the internet.

mahi siah koochooloo

Fri Aug 21, 2009 11:41 AM PDT

aghaye shazde:

you come here and insult the publisher every which way you can calling him infantile, sex-crazed hezbollahi, penis-jerker, twice divorced, this and that.  what's it to you anyway. never touched your member or thought about sex? at least he has the balls to admit to his thoughts. what are you - some dumbshit anonymous idiot has-been.

You don't like me, period!

But I never run after you neither, Madame.

I always give people what they deserve when they are bullying me!

I called you bisavad in that blog, because you came there to call me Morality police and said this :

"It always baffles me how "morality police" feels entitled to shove some form of "morals" down into people's throat; it is quite laughable...Ironically, those who preach these "morals" rarely live their "ideal self.""

While the subject of the blog was Iraj Mirza, and not me! Dozen of people came to say that they disagree with me on that subject, but none of them insulted me or ridiculed me,but  YOU DID IT!

Then I gave you the response that you deserved.

Same thing in that blog of Shazdeh which was meant to ridicule me, while I was the attacked person by him, you come and give your speech about the technical aspect of the story that I wrote and said that you were not impressed by that because its lack of style and technic!! Wow!

The subject was "intimidation" and "Offending" and I was requesting peace and respect for every member of the site, and you were there only to diminish the "technical and the style: of my story?

Did I ask you how you had liked my story? Do I ever come to your blogs or anybody's blog criticizing their lack of technique?

And when I objected to your indifference, you just replied :

"When i go to the chatroom and feel the tension, i get out, as simple as that."

That hurts, Madame !

someone is hurt, is offended, is disrespected, and the only thing you can say is that you were not impressed by their story and if they feel the tension, they just have to get out?

You deserve what you got, Madame. When you have nothing to say, just don't say anything!

Nobody called you to come there and take part for Shazdeh. You did it. You argued. You got the response. Voila!

As simple as that!

Now, if you feel the tension, just get out!

It is truely sad

to see where this vitual world can take you...

Madam Souri made an imaginary friend out of me; had an imaginary debate in which she had argued with me, trashed me, and won the conversation, in an imaginary coffeeshop!  While crying for justice and civility, she has been following my postings calling me ignorant and BISAVAD yet in another thread!  All because i had the audacity to like Shazdeh's writing and had a preference for reading his satire!!!  And, i even dared to comment about the maturity level of the readership, suggesting to the Madam, that one CAN pick and choose the authors that he/she likes!!  For reasons that are beyond my comprehension, the Madam here is been adamantly convinced that we need to be ERSHAD and that if we dont agree; HESABEMOON RO MIRESEH!  Who dares anymore to disagree with her?!

Shazdeh jan, although i did not see any gentleness, civility, or care from Madam Souri; here or elsewhere, i too am deeply saddened, for a different reason though; to see how you were forced to defend your alias; the one that so masterfully been created to make us laugh at ourselves, while seriously questioning our taboos, roles, rules and behavior...To me, this has an eery resemblance to what we are witnessing these days, that is both horrifying and repulsive...

Madam Souri, I dont like your writing; or your style.  

nuf said!

Shazdeh : You are a bi-polar!

Look at what you just wrote and look at what you wrote a few comment below.

From the former one, we can truly find you a Mardom-Azaar. You come here saying everything you want to the people, from the most ugly nickname to the most offensive words, then you come back saying that : you didn't want to offend, and you didn't want to make anybody angry, and that was just for fun!!

Fun for who?

For yourself alone? Or you and your gang?

The people that I got angry with, is not because of you. It is because of their indifference and their irresponsibility towards others.

I told you, you are not the character I like to get along with. Each of us have our right to choose our interlocutor. I don't like to talk to you. I never come to your blogs and never address you directly.

I always asked you to stop from addressing me, stop from mentioning my name in all your posts, stop accusing me all the time to give me a bad reputation and a bad credit.

Did you ever listen to me?

No!

You just went over and over to make me angry (just for fun of course) you went overboard. You said to me (what you know) which is considered as a rape threatening here in the West, even if for some Iranian men of your type, this is called only a JOKE! But in a Canadian court, they would not agree with that, Shazdeh.

Now, I wish you hear me, this time for the last time: Don't turn around me please!

What I said to/about other people, has nothing to do with you. I am a very independent person who have a very independent look at everything and everybody.

I just don't like you! That doesn't mean that I won't like anybody who like you or is friend with you.

Please grew up. This way of thinking is very childish.

Indeed, this is the cause of all your ganging up against one person. People who do that, suffer from an enormous lack of confidence. They (you and your gang) always need the support of their group to exist and/or  to state their ideas.

I am proud to say, that I don't belong to that group.

Now, please respect my space and try to stay away.

Thank you.

Dear Souri

I am not Shazde.Please stop being paranoid.

I do not know you except by your writing . I am not  your fan but

I do not hate you either .I have no wish to be disrespectful to you or anyone else.

Souri: I am not Darius - I wish you a good sleep too ...

This is the only nickname that I am using.

Moreover, I am truely sorry that my comments or jokes have made you angry, because I am a joker, not a Mardom-Azaar.

If one day you get to know me, you will see a family man, who is loved and loving.

Please do not be upset by my comments - this character that I have made on-line is just a clown. I don't wish to upset anyone's peace and good night sleep.

I now realize that I should not even attack people that I don't like on-line (e.g. Q or Jaleho), because they have a right to free speech, as well as I do.

I am sorry that my comment and joking has brought anger in your writting towards other people on this site. You are normally kind and caring, and I do not want to change that.

شازده/داریوش (چونکه جفتتون یک نفر هستین)

خوب، حالا که حرف هاتو زدی و دلت خنک شد، دیگه بسته.

حالا برو مثل یه بچه خوب قرص هاتو بخور و بگیر بخواب.

خواب‌های خوش ببینی‌ انشاالله.

از این خواب‌های پریشون دیگه نبینی.

برو بابا جون، برو اشکالی نداره. ما همه درکت می‌کنیم.

...

انونیموس جان، روز شنبه عصر حضرت عالی‌ به خیر .

ما هم با شما موافق هستیم،یعنی‌ تقریبا با شما موافق هستیم،از هیپی گرایی بیزاریم و از غول سازی فراری ! اینهم مقصر ما نیستیم،به واسطه خونمان است که این قدر به فرهنگ و تربیت اعتقاد داریم !

در این سایت افرادی وجود دارند که ظاطن مریض هستند و ظاهراً علامه دهر ! این افراد بسیار بی‌ ادب و بسیار بی‌ اصل و نسب هستند و دیگر که پرده حجب و حیا و احترام را دریدند و از دموکراسی و منطق بویی به مشامشان نخورده است.حیف است که این سایت اینجور از  شان محترم خود خارج شود.

با این حال خود جهانشاه خان بهتر دانند صلاح کار را، ما که باشیم که حرفمان به چشم باشد !

سر شب کباب جگر درست می‌کنیم،به یاد آن ایام شاد قدیم در شمیران، تشریف بیاورید،در خدمت باشیم .

Excellent conclusion

Thank you dear Alborz.

This is the most intelligent way of elaborating the subject. There are some aspects that I couldn't see clear, without your help. I will try to keep this in mind and practice them more and more. Although, I know my sensitive soul will still hurt a few more times, but as you said, this will be more beneficial to the health of this community than, my way of confronting them hardheadedly.

I'm very grateful to you. You made my day!

And also I must thank all other friends whose contribution in this blog was of a vital help.

Awakened !

Souri Jaan,

I thoroughly enjoyed reading your blog and the ensuing comments compelled me to also add my two cents.   I completely agree with your perspective on our individual roles and responsibilities and the consequences of our failure in this regard.   Although your voice may appear to be amongst the few and far in between, it is not.  Even if it was, change has never occured because of the majority but inspite of it.   However, in this case I think we are well on our way and that you are indeed not alone.  I recently heard an analogy that really resonated with me ... "the sparks in an engine is precisely what is needed to make the engine run and move us forward". 

The principles to which you refer are at risk and no community, virtual or not, has escaped the consequences of their violation.  Iranian.com, just like any community has its own varied neighborhoods and which people choose to visit. 

The site continues to evolve based on its readership and many are already choosing to expend their emotional and intellectual capital in areas that are constructive and avoid those that are not.   I have never seen anyone get into a mud fight and not get muddy, nor have seen anyone stand in a smoke filled room and not inhale the smoke.  So even those that have argued against your clearly stated points understand that in order to remain unaffected, they need to become insensitive.  I have not seen anyone that has become insensitive, to then be selective between the virtual and the real worlds.  In short, their claim has no validity - people do mimic their virtual world experiences in the real world, and that is the toll that we pay in our real communitites.

Individually we should strive to exemplify and uphold those eternal moral principles through our interactions with others.  I have been pleasantly surprised, on more than one occassion, that persistance in this regard, can change the tone of any interaction. I have also convinced myself that I should take the lead when I have no reason to believe that it is a futile act.  When someone is being abusive towards someone who is not reciprocating, I have found that simply acknowledging their commitment to a higher standard is the best way to encourage and promote that standard.  It appears to be much more effective than admonishment.

While many will still attempt to create an engagement in topics that have been debated ad nauseam, the number of folks that will falll for this is diminishing.

Thanks again for bringing this topic to the everyone attention.

Alborz

Red Wine jaan this is not about democracy or tolerance.

This is about how people act and how WE react. For example, if I write a blog and in it say that Mullahs are angels and the best thing that happened to Iran and Shemroon should be demolished, what would you do?

Would you go in and start a "debate" with me?  Would you call me names?  You see that is what I like and I would like for Souri and Irandokht and Anahid to join you too so we can add more people and make it a "party".

I'm saying don't go to their blogs and don't respond to them.  It may be hard and sometimes I do it myself but in general we can stay away from them.

All these people who say Islam is akh va toof and ey faghan and ey havar, don't use their names and don't have the balls to do it in Iran or anything else. JJ is their proxy ball and he has the balls not them.

Whatever we say and write here is under JJ, unless we use our own names and even then it is a reflection on him and he is responsible for them whether he likes it or not!

I deon't agree with Souri that people should not use vulgarity.  I say we can't tell anyone what to do, this is not Iran.  However, there are rules to follow which would prohibit it and if those rules are not enforced we should try to not engage the village idiot ;-)

Everything is sacred.

Then :)

عیب درویش و توانگر به کم و بیش بد است

کار بد مصلحت آنست که مطلق نکنیم

Thanks for the explanation

«میخواره و سرگشته و رندیم و نظر باز 

 آن کس که چو ما نیست در این شهر کدامست؟»

This is my take

:It comes from the word "tamae" in Arabic

طامع = طمع کار

.Tamae, tammaae, taame

Still, I might be wrong. There are some literature professors here who can answer this question better than me

(; ? Do you really call this: exploding

Sister Souri, very good observations

You are very brave too, if you don't mind me saying. But please give us a warning or something before you explode like that, a few days ago.

P.S. What's the meaning of "Nafse Tamea" 

Dear ID

Thanks for the comment.

The message here was "Don't encourage people who are doing wrong, and you know that they are doing wrong!"

I didn't say "People who are wrong". Some readers (not you of course) seem to get the wrong message here.

As for flagging, of course I do flag the offensivecomments. You will be amazed of the number of comments I  flagged which were coming from the people whose ideas were also mine! But I just flag the comment because they were offensive.

In the contrary, there are some other members with whom I don't agree basically, but I always confront other peoples who are constantly insulting and bashing them.

Anyway,

As you might know it already, this blog was based on a previous comment addressed to me in another blog. I had to respond to all the points mentioned there, but the blog is currently closed!

So I did blog all my answers here in the form of a new story.

BN

Either I am not smart enough to understand what you mean, or....
again, sorry if I couldn't make myself understood for you.
As I see you are very much keen to repeat yourself.

I have nothing more to add.

Good luck  with your way and your standards !

سوری جان درست

سوری جان
درست میگی‌، اگر همه مردم سرشون رو بندازن پایین و هیچی‌ نگن وضع بدتر می‌شه که بهتر نمی‌شه، ولی‌ من یکی‌ (از طرف خودم فقط می‌تونم حرف بزنم) واقعاً حوصله چک و چونه زدن با همه را ندارم. یک موقعی هم وقتشو داشتم هم انگیزشو و میرفتم تو دل‌ هرکی‌ که بی‌ ادبی‌ میکرد، زورگویی میکرد، حرف زشت میزد... ولی‌ بعد از مدتی‌ میبینی‌ که تو این cyber world هم مثل دنیای واقعی‌ همه جور آدم پیدا میشه، حتی کسانی که به خاطر دفاع از اون زورگوِ حاضرند تویی که داری برای حقشون میجنگی رو له کنند!

شاید این تقصیر بی‌ فرهنگی‌ خودمون باشه شاید هم تاثیر جانبی cyber world باشه، ولی‌ به نظر من مردم با هم خیلی‌ بد صحبت می‌کنن. من هیچوقت اینطور حرف‌های زننده، اتهام‌های زشت، و بی‌ ادبی‌ در رفتار مردم ندیده بودم که online می‌‌بینم. شاید هم برای همین فکر می‌کنم که بیخودی
سر به دیوار کوبیدنه!

یکی‌ از آقایونی که اینجا همیشه به من پرخاش می‌کنن رو در رو دیدم، با
لبخند بهم سلام کرد. هر کاری کردم نتونستم با لبخند جواب سلامشو بدم...
شاید برای ایشون رو اینترنت لحن صحبتشون جدی نیست، ولی‌ برای من هست.

چند دفعه آدم سرش به سنگ بخوره؟ چند وقته که تا میبینم یکی‌ داره بدوبیراه میگه، خودم را قاطی‌ نمیکنم‌، سرمو میندازم پایین میرم پی کارم! البته بعضی‌ وقت‌ها میبینم طرف داره از پس زورگوِ خوب بر میاد، می‌خونم یک به به هم میگم، ولی‌  دیگه حوصله درد سر ندارم .

البته این جریان من بود، مسئول پاکسازیiraniandotcom  نیستیم که...  اگر ببینم یکی‌ هم زیادی حرف مفت میزنه flag می‌کنم، دیگه JJ خودش میدونه چی‌ تو ایمیل براشون بفرسته یا شاید هم هیچی‌ نگه.
البته میل و تصمیم خودتونه و هر چه که تصمیم بگیرید براتون آرزوی موفقیت دارم .
شاد باشی‌
ایراندخت

Souri jan

I have always tried to be respectful to everyone I meet on the Internet, and also in the real physical world. The world runs smoother and sweeter when people are civil to each other. I may be wrong, but one of the rules of civility is to try not to impose one's own standards on other people who do not have or do not wish to have your standards. If I go to someone's house where everyone burps after dinner, it is not my place to start preaching how rude it is to burp (even though the standard indicates that burping is no good.)  

BN, again:

I know you may not be very fluent in Persian, but unfortunately the text is written in Persian and my English is not good enough to translate it in English.

The whole story is not about preventing you to have the friends of your choice in the site. Believe me, I have more important things to do in my life, than wanting to show whom you should chose as friends, or what you must do before sleeping.

I will highlight the main point of my blog, as to show you what is the principal message. If you still don't get it.........

sorry!

BN, as you addressed me here

I must reply to you personally. You said :

"One minute they sway to the left and the next minute they are touching the ground on the right, one minute they agree with you and tell you they are your friend and the next minute they shred you into pieces."

It is not about me. It is not about you. It is about the rules and ethics.

Do you like to see your neighborhood full of shit when you come back home from a stressful day?

"To you a person may be rude or insensitive. To me the same person may
be the ideal friend and vice versa. We all have the privilege of our
choices and decisions as who is going to be our friend. "

I don't know what is the measure of civility and ethics for you, but believe it or not, there are very standard measures for that, which are recognized and respected, world widely. Nothing that I would invented for my own pleasure!

The coarse words and profanities are rude, insensitive and even more than that! If it doesn't sound like same synonyms for you, then you may need to update your book! No one said "Don't be their friend" but just don't encurage them to do wrong.

Another lesson from your teacher, Souri.

souri jan

I am only talking about the internet and not the real outside world. In this electronic plaza one meets many thousands of people and may choose a few with whom one interacts. Very soon, like the real world, we can decide whether we want to continue this interaction based on the compatibility with the person or we may decide to pass them by and to go to the next one.  It is our choice. It is our decision. To you a person may be rude or insensitive. To me the same person may be the ideal friend and vice versa. We all have the privilege of our choices and decisions as who is going to be our friend. 

There are some people who take everything personally and want to teach everyone how to behave, how to speak properly, how to address others, how this and how that. They fight every little battle they come to and want to make sure they win with the most amount of blood on the ground.

To me that is a big waste of time. I would say to these people to try to choose their battles wisely and don't waste their time and energy too much on the people they meet on the Intenet. Even though your "opponent"  is sitting behind their computer creating word after word, they do not exist. They are as real as 0s and 1s. One minute they have one name and the next minute they have another. One minute they sway to the left and the next minute they are touching the ground on the right, one minute they agree with you and tell you they are your friend and the next minute they shred you into pieces. 

...

متاسفانه ما ایرانی‌‌ها همیشه برای رسیدن به اهدافمان در زندگی‌، سیاست افراط و تفریط را در پیش میگیریم.همیشه با این سیاست بازنده هستیم و دیگران را هم به این روش،به پای خودمان میسوزانیم.

اشکال در تربیت ما است و فقر فرهنگی‌ شدیدی که در بین ما است، انگاری به ما یاد ندادند که باید به نظر و عقیده دیگران احترام گذشت، از همه بیخود شاکی‌ هستیم و تنها به قاضی رفته و دیگران را همیشه بیسواد و نادان میدانیم.

وضع ما خیلی‌ خراب است و سالها از داشتن یک فرهنگ درست و یک تربیت درست تر محروم هستیم.همگی مقصر هستیم.

سپاسگزارم سوری جان از مطالب شما .

One hell of a good writing!

Excellent.

Thanks Anahid and Anonymouse

My blog was not pointed to the people who are abusing the site, although they too, can benefit from those advices. This blog is addressed to the whole readership, every reader, like you and myself.
We have to acknowledge our responsibility and exigence from others, in order that a legitimate level of serenity and humanity be respected.

Back in 90s when internet and chatroom were becoming popular

people would go in and just make off the wall commets just to see how people would react.

Men would go in and say things like; how big are your breasts or do you want to ..... and so forth.  And then they'd burst into laughter behind the computer with their friends who didn't have computers at the time, too expensive and not cheap like TVs lets say ;-) 

Then in the chat rooms some would just log off and some would actually like it and start flirting with one another like phone sex.

Now fast forward to today and i.com and forget about chat rooms.  In the whole website there are many who left and right and day and night just scream Islam and facist and Islam and ey havar and ey faghan!

The more they say ey havar va ey faghan, the more and instantly JJ features them.  So on one hand you have this group.  On the other hand you have few who just like to support the regime no matter what and the first group finds it in their heart to just get into a pissing fight with them day in and day out.

Other times regular people get tangled up too from time to time.  Best advice I can give to anyone who is listening and thinks there is a problem, is to just ignore these people.  They are here only to get attention and have something opposite to say.  Just to say they are different whereas they're just harrasing.

So let them be alone and don't pay them any attention.  If you don't go to their blogs and leave comments or respond to their comments they'll become isole (as we say in Farsi).  Now practice since practice makes perfect.  Have a good weekend y'all!

Everything is sacred.

Is Iranian.com in a funk?

I don't know if I am using word "funk' correctly here and my apologies to Jahanshah if I am "tanha be ghazi miravam".  For  the past day, I did not feel like reading too much Iranian.com or commenting.  I am starting to get a bit tired of predictability of some of the blogs.  I believe for few months, Iranian.com was doing great when it was close to election and after that when people objected to all cheating in election.  People voiced their anger about atrocities in Iran.  However, now people are getting frustrated and some are getting bold.  We have people like "Jaleho" who boldly say that people should not go to Ghods demonstrations forgetting that IRI has left no option for people because of all the killing and raping when people go to their own demonstrations.  Then on the site we have people who are justly angry about all that has happened in Iran so they start to write blogs that become racists toward arabs or these people might insult Jaleho ,etc. 

Dear Souri, as far as people abusing you in the chat room, that was wrong.  Souri jan, you get involved in comment exchanges with guys (and gals)  on this site and many times you do better than them.  Many of us women just give up when exchanges become too long.  but you steadfastly make your point.  Some guys ( and some women too) don't like this and feel threatened by it.  This does not justify their abusive behavior but it explains it. If what you said about behavior of a person in chat room is correct, that person should not be permitted to use this site.  Any way, JJ, sorry about saying that Iranian.com is in state of funk.  I may be wrong but even if it is, it is normal considering what is happening wih quest for freedom in Iran.