Islam, Chelokabab and Wet T-Shirt

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Islam, Chelokabab and Wet T-Shirt
by Shazde Asdola Mirza
01-Jun-2012
 

During a three-night stay in Vancouver, I was invited to a condo party.  My friend’s posh condo was walking distance from the hotel … I was alone, and he was trying to pay off prior dinners at our place.

It turned out to be a “get to know your Persian neighbor” party. Most people at the simple dinner were FOB (fresh off the boat) Iranians – with more money than any of us mere mortals can ever count. Hence, their surprise to meet someone like me … a “veritable” Canadian-Iranian in shorts and sandals … while 90% of the men in attendance were wearing three-piece suites!

Don’t know about you guys, but I am not going to wear tie to a condo party-room. Besides, I was wearing my bathing suit underneath, for a swim in the promised deluxe condo pool.

One of the new condo owners in attendance, was an ex IRI chief of one thing or the other (a hairy and ugly creature, whom I shall call Mr. Mohr Pishoni) … with a pretty wife who was searching for a low-cost English as Second Language class.

Anyhow, I was standing there like a sore thumb, trying to be friendly and helpful towards various inquiries and questions. But it was clear that the well dressed crowd was simply confused by my presence; and was even dreading the thought of turning into a slob like me, in 10-20 years.

The reception was chips and pop … and the meal was Chelokabab, served out of big aluminum containers onto plastic plates. If E.E. is reading this … you still owe me a proper dinner, dude!

Thanks god for the line-up and mayhem associated with the grand opening of the Chelokabab aluminum-containers, which allowed me to sneak out. Tired and bored, I decided to use the nice condo pool for some cool down.

It was between the 5th and the 6th lap that I noticed the strangest thing in the world. Mrs. MP came to the pool area, all clad and covered in shirt, pants and scarf.

Trying hard to maintain my coordination, and prevent chlorinated water from entering me lungs … I carried on, wondering what she was going to do. Well, she stepped gingerly into the hot-tub by the pool, and sat there immersed to her neck.

After 15 minutes, when she stood up – I realized how much sexier the all-clad and wet woman’s body can be, compared to the swimsuit. Again more pool water entered my respiratory system, but it was worth the good look at that wet and plum figure.

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more from Shazde Asdola Mirza
 
Shazde Asdola Mirza

"then what would have been left of a woman?? "

by Shazde Asdola Mirza on Sat Jun 02, 2012 09:13 PM PDT

Thanks Mamoor jan, for all this comic relief.

BTW, she was just asking the color of your preferance ... which is not "pervert language" in this country. But WTG teaching her:

"u surely dont talk like a woman should"


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AMIR1973

Mamoor joon is an authority on swimming pools

by AMIR1973 on Sat Jun 02, 2012 09:10 PM PDT

Was it the special shallow one set aside for the 9 and under crowd? Just asking.


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مآمور

out of all your comments

by مآمور on Sat Jun 02, 2012 09:01 PM PDT

Dear Fanoos, r u saying u r a female?? u surely dont talk like a woman should, however, I ve seen this before and indeed, u could be a woman !!

if a woman uses the same sexist pervert language as a man would talking to another woman(me in this case), then what would have been left of a woman??

no my dear, u only 'bashed' yourself(if u r a woman)

I m who I m in that avatar, however, if it makes u guys feel better call me any thing u want!!

I wear an Omega watch


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Shazde Asdola Mirza

You are a genius Mamoor: That is the name of this story's Condo!

by Shazde Asdola Mirza on Sat Jun 02, 2012 08:47 PM PDT

So your morning shift has started in Tehran? or in Lebanon?

Did you Google: outdoor pools in Vancouver? ... lol.

Now, go and Google: Condo!


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مآمور

شازده جون عزیز دل خودم

مآمور
Sat Jun 02, 2012 08:22 PM PDT

There is a big one in Stanley park right by the English bay!!

I wear an Omega watch


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Shazde Asdola Mirza

Dear friends: thanks for your comments

by Shazde Asdola Mirza on Sat Jun 02, 2012 05:25 PM PDT

Fanoos, Amir, Mardom and Vildemose jan: thanks for your "mamoor bashing", which is turing into quite a sport on IC.

Dear Bahmani: I am a frequent reader and enjoyer of your blogs, and wish you all the best, and us more of your contributions.

Mousa dear: you again seem to be on the run from Shabbat ... oh well, what can I say, but encourage you to read more of your Rabbi's sermons:

//www.rabbijason.com/jokes/ 


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mousa67

the shia babe with wet hijab, reminds me of my own fati commando

by mousa67 on Sat Jun 02, 2012 01:42 PM PDT

before she put on the extra 50 pounds. nowadays, since losing her job with press tv, she charges me for everything. $10 extra for wet t-shirt, another $10 for wet chador, the price list is available on line.

btw you are a lucky man mr shazdeh to get invited to all these chelo koobab pool side parties. i have done everything, even offering free coke or pepsi (choice , the hosts undeniable right) to be invited to one of these parties. instead, i only get abuse and flagged.


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Shazde Asdola Mirza

QED: mamoor has the right IQ for serving IRI

by Shazde Asdola Mirza on Sat Jun 02, 2012 04:48 PM PDT

People, people ... don't take this fool seriously.

He is not a UK residing intelligent lady (like N.P.), but a truely dumb IRI "mamoor" with an IQ of no more than 70.

The fool thinks that I jumped out of the pool (of this story) and took a photo of Mrs. MP ... lol.

With what could I take the photo, Mamoor?

How many outdoor swimming pools have you seen in Vancouver, Mamoor?


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bahmani

Proof: Hejab cannot stop the Tease!

by bahmani on Sat Jun 02, 2012 12:04 PM PDT

Thanks for proving the theory! I was recently "walked by" an Iranian Hejabi too, wearing the cream-color matching tight slacks and shirt/jacket combo, completed with designer sunglasses by Gucci.

After we made the prerequisite eye contact, and she established me as a lustful American (Cuz I look like one, at first), she immediately reciprocated my smile, and began her sultry moves, and I tell you, I have never seen so much obvious "action" waddling by.

So the take away was, "I am a Moslem, AND I have moves like Jagger."

Jiggle, Joggle, Jiggle, Joggle, hipsway-left, hipsway right, hipsway way to the left, then pause, and repeat.

Hilarious! WWAD! (What Would Allah Do)

To read more bahmani posts visit: //brucebahmani.blogspot.com/


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Mardom Mazloom

Mamooreh at seaside

by Mardom Mazloom on Sat Jun 02, 2012 01:49 PM PDT


Front and Back


A habit that has stayed with him since he was studying Farsi in a boshkeh at Fayzieh Institute of Technology (F.I.T.) in Qom.


  •  
vildemose

 Does Mois have an office

by vildemose on Sat Jun 02, 2012 09:26 AM PDT

 Does Mois have an office in UK?

 

All Oppression Creates a State of War--Simone De Beauvoir


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vildemose

 Mamooreh khanoom sounds

by vildemose on Sat Jun 02, 2012 09:25 AM PDT

 Mamooreh khanoom sounds like she is Sunni. Who knew?

 

All Oppression Creates a State of War--Simone De Beauvoir


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AMIR1973

Mamoorakam

by AMIR1973 on Sat Jun 02, 2012 08:06 AM PDT

If Shazde got his Photo Shopping from the IRI, there would be a picture of a phony missile launch rather than a Fati Commando, azizam.


  •  
fanoos

Dooshezeh Mamoor khanoom....

by fanoos on Sat Jun 02, 2012 08:03 AM PDT

Do you wear pink color bikinis like I do or turquoise color like Fati khanoom in the photo?


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مآمور

on the observation point

by مآمور on Sat Jun 02, 2012 07:55 AM PDT

Vancouver is still too cold for people diving in water in open sir!!

did u buy photo shop pirated software in Iran? or u just Google?? gogorey magory

I wear an Omega watch


  •  
مآمور

she must be shia

by مآمور on Sat Jun 02, 2012 07:57 AM PDT

دستمالی شده و در زباله دانی انداخته شده ساخت حیفا مال شما!!
آفتاب مهتاب ندیده خانه دار و کدبانو مال ما
خلایق هر چه لایق

I wear an Omega watch


  •  
Shazde Asdola Mirza

Ugly boys in three-piece suits eating Chelokabab

by Shazde Asdola Mirza on Sat Jun 02, 2012 07:10 AM PDT

Faramarz jan,

Funny enough, they were still eating (desert and ice cream) when I returned.

Actually the desert part was the only nice segment, as the sweets were ordered from a 1st class Persian patisserie in North Vancouver (Laleh).

Well, I can say no to many things, but not to Zolbiya Bamiya.


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Shazde Asdola Mirza

گربه‌ها گاهی "میو میو" میکنند، ولی‌ گاهی چنگ میزنند

Shazde Asdola Mirza
Sat Jun 02, 2012 06:50 AM PDT

Dear Oon Yaroo:

As a gentleman and a scholar, I am sure that you wouldn't have made any advances towards that married cat, either.

Invitation-wise, we first need to agree on a meeting place. You know my preference (Richmond Hill, Ontario), but I am open to other suggestions too.


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Shazde Asdola Mirza

Confused mamoor of IRI ...

by Shazde Asdola Mirza on Sat Jun 02, 2012 07:11 AM PDT

... It is an observation.


  •  
Faramarz

Playing Lifeguard!

by Faramarz on Sat Jun 02, 2012 06:16 AM PDT

 

 


Well, it looks like that while the ugly boys in three-piece suits were eating Chelokabab inside, Shazde was teaching the lady in wet blue outfit how to do backstrokes in the shallow pool!

No cultural differences there!

Vancouver is nice this time of the year!


  •  
Oon Yaroo

Shazdeh Jaan! Meow Meow....!

by Oon Yaroo on Sat Jun 02, 2012 06:15 AM PDT

You should have got into the hot-tub approached MP from under the water and touched her CAT! Meow Meow....!:-)

Worse came to worst in case she would scream pedophile, you could always explain the incident as a cultural misunderstanding!

But being Shazdeh the Great that you are, she would grab you hand a beg for more....Bemall baby! Meow Meow...!

Shazdeh jaan why don't invite some of us to join you in these kinds of parties? We like cats too!


  •  
مآمور

این که شما نوشتید انتقاد است یا تائید؟؟

مآمور
Fri Jun 01, 2012 10:23 PM PDT

I wear an Omega watch


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