ADVICE
به زبان فارسی
PICTORY
LATEST MUSIC
SEARCH
The art of getting some
31-Aug-2007
Being a non-Christian and non-European, or non-white, is something to set aside Iranians, and most other men from the Middle East, in their search, or pursuit, of/for women. Although Iranians, or other men from the Middle East, are mostly of Caucasian race, they have darker skin. But it is not the darker skin (sometimes it can actually be very attractive) that usually creates the differences but religion, and a not-so-pretty public perception about people from the Middle East.
So, I thought to come up with a recipe to success that every Iranian man needs to read, in case he's on hunt for a Christian wife or girlfriend, or general improvement in sympathy, or success, among women of Europe or America. As mentioned earlier, the differences exist, and cannot be ignored. Iranian, Arab, Afghan or Turkish, men (and men from some other smaller nations from the same area) in America and Europe, although being of the same Caucasian race, are seen differently. These men have a pretty bad image that creates their special situation worth considering.
Let's start with one very very important thing, just like selling a product, when you are a man, you are sort of trying to sell your product on the market. You put yourself on some sort of a virtual (imaginary) shelf for women's picking/ viewing, so that some, or more, of them can fall for your offering. So, you kind of need to do what they call in marketing a SWOT analysis. SWOT goes for strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats (threats is less relevant though important if you consider the post-success period).
I have done the SWOT analysis and reached some conclusions that you, the Iranian man, can take into consideration.
STRENGTHS - what then:
First, you need to analyse your specific situation, to see what is your strong point compared to the competition. Women care about strenght a lot. They don't want losers, unless they are so 'poorly' equipped themselves they go for almost everything.
So, you need to know your strengths very well, and SHOW it, though NEVER try to boast. Women do not like boasters. Women like intelligent men, and intelligent men never boast. Intelligent men know that being kind is good for them, and their image, and they always try to be kind to others, male or female, and boasting is not being kind. Boasting is very very bad for one's public image. It shows that you are stupid, PERIOD.
To understand your strong points you need to know how wealthy you are, and how good-lloking you are, compared to the competition of course. Women in the West are used to seeing wealthy or good-looking men, so unless you are going for the date with a Rolls-Royce, Bentley, Ferrari, Lamborghini or Bugatti, and you look like Brad Pitt, you are not far from average.
After analysing your wealth and looks, you need to take appropriate measures in order to improve your image. You need to dress well, use perfumes, and have a nice and clean car, and if necessary go to the gym or do some sports to improve your looks too. The house is less important because if she accepted to come and see your house it is already a bit too late for her to change her mind, unless your house is so messed-up and dirty that it will turn her stomach around!
All these cost money, so you need to spend some money! Yes, to have success with women you actually need to spend some money. The more money you can afford the more you ought to spend, though without boasting and intimidating the woman. You need to be respectful, and not inferiorate the woman with your wealth. You need to show humbleness. That is a clear sign of intelligence, and women LOVE intelligent men. If someone tells you that women don't care about money, then he probably got married with his mom's help.
Women do care about money but that does not mean they ONLY care about money. Money is a basic requirement for life. In order to raise a child, a woman needs a man, AND some money! It is very simple. So, your style, your clothes, and your car, will show that you have some money. Women are genetically engineered to look for men who can afford raising children, and that means spending some extra money.
Of course, we all know that some men have so little money they cannot afford expensive clothes or a really nice car. What about them? Well, they can always try getting a better, or second, job. But maybe they are simply not that well-positioned in the society so they just need to live with a less plentiful lifestyle. These men need to consider their situation very carefully and do as much as they can to make some improvements, and in case improvements are almost impossible they can ALWAYS be nice, gentle, courteous and caring toward women, smile often, and make nice jokes. These work because they show that the man is not sad, and confident about life.
Women will never fall for a sad man. Women want strong, confident, lively men. Strong, confident lively men bring joy and action to life. Sad men bring nothing, but sadness. A lonely woman is always happier being lonely than being with a sad man, so why hang around with a sad man? Well, in case she is even more depressed she will be satisfied with a sad man, because he can offer a better horizon, but then again why would the man want a more depressed woman? Maybe for sex? That's true too, for a terribly desperate man!
In case you are an Iranian man and you think that being an Iranian is a strength in itself, then believe me you are pretty dumb. Try not to hide being an Iranian because it will reveal itself sooner or later and show that you are not a confident man, but try also not to be arrogant because you are an Iranian, and try NOT to spell Iranian PERRRRSSSHIAN, because Western women will never understand what you are saying.
Unless the woman thinks Iranians are Arabs then you can, just for the sake of correctness, tell her that Iranians are not Arabs because they are mostly non-Arabic speakers, or mostly Persian-speakers. That is quite enough. Being an Iranian, or a Persian, is NO strength. You can use this, being an Iranian, to show that you are not in favour of the IRI regime and that you condemn their treatment of women etc. That will make a good impression.
You can also use your Iranian-ness to make fun... of yourself. You think you can't? Yes, you can make some nice jokes, which are very good to impress women. Make jokes about terrorism, bombs, nuclear weapons, Ahmadinejad, so on and so forth. Try to show that you are open-minded and smart, and that will also make a very good impression. As said earlier, women like intelligence REALLY A LOT. And an intelligent man can be funny, using all the tools available. For example you can say to her that if she is not good you can use your opportunity to go to heaven (to get 70-something virgins as reward), and take her, a Christian infidel, with you.
I know, this sounds pretty bad, but if you say it like a joke, it can work very well, because it will be something really original. So, being an Iranian can sometimes be a strength too, because you can play the victim (by criticising the Iranian regime) and also use your nationality to make jokes.
WEAKNESSES - what then:
It is good to know your weaknesses. That will make you less stupid, or smarter, especially when you have a lot of weaknesses, and being an Iranian, is definitely a weak point rather than a strong point.
You think being an Iranian is a strong point? Why? Why would it be a strong point? You are from a Muslim country that exports terrorism. Your skin is pretty dark (that is not always bad, but more often bad) and the only thing the average Christian woman knows about Iran is that Iranians are related to one or more of the following: terrorism, Muslim extremism, nuclear proliferation, public hangings, human rights violations, mistreatment of women, etc. The list can go on. You think Westerners are wrong to know ONLY these about Iranians?
You may be right. But, here it is about being successful with women, not academic discourse. You are not going to disagree with a woman on all these things and then expect her to like you. Because disagreeing with all her brainly images about Iran you are simply telling her that she is an idiot. If she is an idiot, then don't date her, go and find an Iranian girl for yourself who agrees almost with everything you say! Public image of Iranians, and Muslims in general, in the West, is really bad.
Don't try to disagree with the public image. Believe me, it is not them who are really guilty for their perception. It is the Iranian regime, or Muslim countries, and to some degree the people (maybe more than the regimes) who are guilty.
OPPORTUNITIES - what then:
To meet women, you need to look for them, and use all the possible means to be exposed to places (even the Internet) where there are women. It depends on what you are looking for. You are not going to have anything but frustration if you go to an ultra-expensive club dressed and styled like an average Tehran bazaari. Try to be exposed to as many places as possible without wasting your time or making fun of yourself.
Remember that women neither like losers, nor the depressed. They are not searching for children to care for. They are searching for MEN to care for them, to protect them and to protect, eventually, their children. So, you need to be confident and have a shiny image wherever you go. You cannot have an extraordinary dress-code or style all the time, but you can have a strong positive aura around you.
THREATS - what then:
In case you are interested in protecting and preserving a relationship, then you must treat the woman with care, and love, be a strong man for the society and the most gentle of all the gentlemen she has known when treating her.
Making small gifts time to time and being careful about her simplest needs (like giving her a cup of coffee once a week) impresses women a lot and shows that you care about her. There are always threats from the competition and you need to prevent them from becoming dangerous. You need to be one step ahead of the 'market' by simply avoiding trouble and being a caring person who is not boring. That is enough for women. Women need some protection, and some entertainment, just like men. It is true that after they get older and they notice that there is almost no admirer left out there they will reduce their desires, but then again, they (the women) are human beings just like men and we need to treat them with respect at all times.
Finally, I need to say that the above is not perfect, and the separation into the SWOT sections is even more imperfect, but keeping in mind that Iranian, or Middle-Eastern, men are a bit different, I thought it would be helpful to give some small, more specific hints. One of the biggest mistakes Iranian men make when dealing with Christian women of America, and Europe, is that they are not considering the realities. Iranian men, taught and raised differently, do not yet (generally) understand that free women are not like those Iranian girls who have little access to men.
Iranian men still think that the best, and ethically-correct, way to get a woman is to go to her parents. Well, it doesn't work anymore. It was not a good idea from the start, though things have moved on and you cannot expect the same things from today's educated women in the West. Nevertheless women are women and men are men. They are different. I cannot say what Iranian women need to do in order to be successful with Christian men simply because I am a man, and I have NO idea about this matter, because I am different.
| Recently by Ben Madadi | Comments | Date |
|---|---|---|
| Moving forward | 33 | Nov 06, 2008 |
| Testing democracy | 15 | Nov 02, 2008 |
| Playing dumb? | 72 | Sep 29, 2008 |
RECENT COMMENTS
IRANIANS OF THE DAY
| Person | About | Day |
|---|---|---|
| نسرین ستوده: زندانی روز | Dec 04 | |
| Saeed Malekpour: Prisoner of the day | Lawyer says death sentence suspended | Dec 03 |
| Majid Tavakoli: Prisoner of the day | Iterview with mother | Dec 02 |
| احسان نراقی: جامعه شناس و نویسنده ۱۳۰۵-۱۳۹۱ | Dec 02 | |
| Nasrin Sotoudeh: Prisoner of the day | 46 days on hunger strike | Dec 01 |
| Nasrin Sotoudeh: Graffiti | In Barcelona | Nov 30 |
| گوهر عشقی: مادر ستار بهشتی | Nov 30 | |
| Abdollah Momeni: Prisoner of the day | Activist denied leave and family visits for 1.5 years | Nov 30 |
| محمد کلالی: یکی از حمله کنندگان به سفارت ایران در برلین | Nov 29 | |
| Habibollah Golparipour: Prisoner of the day | Kurdish Activist on Death Row | Nov 28 |
Payam's article
by Al Aleph on Sun Sep 27, 2009 04:37 AM PDTThanks for sharing that with us Payam. You are very lucky that you found someone who likes you as a person and not due to your material wealth (which you did not posses at the time).
I was born in the UK, male 27, parents came from pakistan. I'm pretty sure that no one has approached my parents in the UK regarding marriage mainly because i am not financially stable. I do not have a great deal of money or a huge disposable income or a degree in medicine. I like to live a simple life and that is what makes it hard to find a pakistani muslim girl.
Materialism not happiness. I'm going to Iran soon. I might find someone there. I think Iranian women have western values when it comes to marriage and finding a partner.
Am i right or am i being naive?
Gold-digging American women
by Trainwreck (not verified) on Thu Dec 18, 2008 12:59 PM PSTI am an American and I refuse to date American women also. They look only at what they get from the man and really care little for the man. I consider prostitutes to be more ethical than American and American-ized women because at least prostitutes will have sex with a man for money and both know that.
American and American-ized women watch garbage like Tyra, Oprah, soap operas and listen to the feminist garbage spewed forth. There's nothing in this world more selfish than an American or an American-ized woman.
I have seen American women leave their husbands for such trivial cr@p like "..I want to find myself...", "...my career is hampered by this marriage...", and "...I think I want to be a lesbian".
Response to "Okay Sasha!"
by Sasha on Sun Oct 07, 2007 02:25 PM PDTI agree with you, the Iranian community is amazing. The more I learn about it the more fascinated I become. I just wish learning Farsi was not so complicated but I think it will also be worth learning. I actually did subscribe to have iranian.com sent to my email so that I can read it several times a week. Actually the only reason I never got any hate mail on my articles is because I write with a passive voice. It is part of my socialized upbringing: meek and mild. I think that is probably another reason I like your articles. You most certainly do not write in a passive voice. Wish you the best. :o)
Okay Sasha!
by Ben Madadi on Sun Oct 07, 2007 09:12 AM PDTOkay Sasha, I didn't wanna pick a fight with you, nor do I pick any fight with any-one. I didn't want to know who you are in reality. I wrote about you NOT being registered because I thought that unregistered users do not come to this website frequently so I kinda thought that my response to you will not be read by you. I'm glad you read it ;) The Iranian community is an extraordinary, fun and diverse community, so I wish you have a good time here!
Who is Sasha?
by Sasha on Sat Oct 06, 2007 09:11 PM PDTBen if you want to know who I am or at least more about me simply go to your article " Love Me or Hate me". Someone named Question wanted to know about my past in "Dear Sasha". I did my best to answer this person's question as accuratly and honestly as possible. I have registered my nickname. I hope you are happy now.:o) I think I will do as you do and start using my nickname to submit anymore articles. Best wishes
Response to Ben's "To Sasha"
by sasha (not verified) on Sat Oct 06, 2007 08:26 PM PDTNow that is rich indeed. Are you trying to pick a fight with me Ben? Hmmmmmmmmm........ May I point out that I am not the only one with a posted comment that is not a verified account. Is it your way of asking who I am? There are other ways of asking me. I can assure you I have an account under my real name as I do have two articles published on this website. Sasha is my nickname which is used by my friends and I happen to be very fond of it. I would also like to point out that Ben Madadi is not your real name Mr. not verified account. I can assure you that I enter my real email address as required to post my comments.
I would like to object to your use of "confront this issue" It is only an issue if they make it one. No one is telling them to get a Christian/Western woman. It is because they are attracted to them that it becomes a problem for the man.
You are very welcome and I do mean it when I write that I find your writing interesting. It provokes the Iranian community to think about certain issues whether they agree with you or not and therefore brings about dialogue.
No, Ben I am not an Iranian but that does not mean I do not care about Iranian issues. I have developed many Iranian friends. I have been trying to gain a better understanding of the Iranian culture, politics, history, etc. I have only been doing so for a year now. It will take many years to gain a full understanding of it. I have time......I think it is worth it.
How about writing an article for the women? What does an Iranian man seek in a woman? What does he want, need and desire in a woman? As his wife? Now, that would be an article worth reading. Gaining a better understanding of the thinking process of an Iranian man. Inquiring minds want to know. Take it as a personal challenge.
Response to Ben's "To Sasha"
by sasha (not verified) on Sat Oct 06, 2007 08:26 PM PDTNow that is rich indeed. Are you trying to pick a fight with me Ben? Hmmmmmmmmm........ May I point out that I am not the only one with a posted comment that is not a verified account. Is it your way of asking who I am? There are other ways of asking me. I can assure you I have an account under my real name as I do have two articles published on this website. Sasha is my nickname which is used by my friends and I happen to be very fond of it. I would also like to point out that Ben Madadi is not your real name Mr. not verified account. I can assure you that I enter my real email address as required to post my comments.
I would like to object to your use of "confront this issue" It is only an issue if they make it one. No one is telling them to get a Christian/Western woman. It is because they are attracted to them that it becomes a problem for the man.
You are very welcome and I do mean it when I write that I find your writing interesting. It provokes the Iranian community to think about certain issues whether they agree with you or not and therefore brings about dialogue.
No, Ben I am not an Iranian but that does not mean I do not care about Iranian issues. I have developed many Iranian friends. I have been trying to gain a better understanding of the Iranian culture, politics, history, etc. I have only been doing so for a year now. It will take many years to gain a full understanding of it. I have time......I think it is worth it.
How about writing an article for the women? What does an Iranian man seek in a woman? What does he want, need and desire in a woman? As his wife? Now, that would be an article worth reading. Gaining a better understanding of the thinking process of an Iranian man. Inquiring minds want to know. Take it as a personal challenge.
To sasha...
by Ben Madadi on Mon Sep 24, 2007 08:04 AM PDTUnfortunately this user is not a verified one (i.e. she does not have an account)! I am not fascinated with having a Christian/Western woman. I do not pursue this myself, though many Iranians living in the West, simply because of living in a mainly Christian community, confront this issue. About OTHER articles of mine, thank you for saying they are interesting, and thank you for expressing your opinion! I do not enjoy receving hate-mails. If you are not an Iranian then you are probably not very much aware of Iranian realities. If I develop the subject much further HERE then the haters will move here and continue their stuff here and therefore this page will become something other than it was meant to be.
Be yourself
by Sasha (not verified) on Thu Sep 20, 2007 06:21 PM PDTAs an American Christian woman, I do not understand the fascination you have with having an American Christian woman. :o) Seriously, I recommend to be yourself. It is better to be with a woman, who accepts you for who you are then to have to play mind games and pretend you are someone you are not. Probably the reason, you have not kept the woman, you wanted.
I have many Iranian friends and the joke about them being terrorist would be offensive to me. I like my friends and I do not see them as terrorists. I think all my Iranian friends whether Muslim or not are brilliant individuals. I am beginning to think you love people to be mean to you. I had two articles published on iranian.com and I have never received any hate mail. People just love to hate you. I think your articles are interesting. No, I do not hate you. I have the ability to be objective in my thought process. :o)
Have a nice day, Madadi.
Ask Jahanshah!
by Ben Madadi on Tue Sep 04, 2007 07:04 AM PDTSHORTS is probably a member (just a nick-name) of the iranian.com administration.
OK...
by Ben Madadi on Tue Sep 04, 2007 01:28 AM PDTI think the subject needs more developement and details. It is very complicated indeed.
my 1.5 cents!
by Ali_G on Tue Sep 04, 2007 12:09 AM PDTDear Ben,
Interesting read, but I have to say that I disagree with some of the stuff that you said. Before I start I have to say that I know that this was only some of your opinions and not a systematic and scientific review of any sort … and I’m no expert on this matter by any means. I'm just going to share some of my opinions. I’ll try not to take the whole matter too seriously.
I’ve dated many north Americans and few Europeans. For me one thing is for sure … you can’t and shouldn’t always be nice and humble with women. It just doesn’t work. I’m not suggesting that one should act like a jerk or be disrespectful, but little bit of cockiness and sarcasm goes a long way. Another common mistake is showing too much interest. Being funny, if you have it, also goes a very long way with American women. Europeans (non-English speaking) have a different sense of humor that I quite don’t understand. Of course every now and then you have to show your softer and nicer side. Intermittent niceness is much better appreciated by a woman than being constantly super nice and accommodating. It’s all about finding the balance and modifying it based on the opposite person. Women like challenge, and if they feel that you are all over them and trying to please them at all times, they consider you an easy target that’s always there for them. I also totally agree that intelligence is a huge turn on for most women. If possible try to make her feel a little dumb, but in a nice kind of way!
I have never felt that my nationality has been a problem for dating women, but the women that I’m attracted to are predominantly the educated and relatively liberal type. I once dated a French-Canadian that her father was very unhappy that she was dating an Iranian! Over all I think once you understand the mentality of the western women it is very easy, and in my mind much more pleasant than Iranian females, to date them. Of course, the bottom line is that there is really no formula and what works for one may not work for another one. The rules also change when it comes to a deeper and more serious relationship. However so far this has worked very well for me. As far as keeping a relationship I need a lot of advice on that!
Damn it! I rambled for way too long.
Cheers!
Ali_G
Hello Jigsaw, I
by Payam on Mon Sep 03, 2007 09:54 PM PDTHello Jigsaw,
I would not be able to comment on what we do without exposing our trade secrets. However, what you have found is related partially.
By the way, I am not a researcher anymore :) It is a long time I have not worked in the lab.
interesting
by jigsaw on Mon Sep 03, 2007 12:20 PM PDTA blogger (Short) has posted Payam's comment, " from an Iranian CEO", as a separate entry on this site. what could be the blogger's motives?
//iranian.com/main/node/4323
Dear Payam: does this
by jigsaw on Mon Sep 03, 2007 09:51 AM PDTDear Payam: does this relate to your research:
//www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2005/09/050923153551.htm
I think there is no reason why you shouldn't reveal your true identity and your contriubtion to humanity.
Payam, THE ONLY THING
by flovius on Mon Sep 03, 2007 07:41 AM PDTPayam,
THE ONLY THING YOU HAVE ACHIEVED IS TO PROVE THAT YOU
ARE A LIAR, A PHONY, A FRAUD AND A COWARD.
YOU HAVE NO CREDIBILITY.
THE ONLY Ph.D. YOU HAVE IS IN LYING AND FRAUD!
Payam...
by Ben Madadi on Mon Sep 03, 2007 07:30 AM PDTDon't waste your time explaining to people how you are in real life dear Payam! It is not worth it, as I explained. The Internet is NOT for this purpoise unless you reveal exactly who you are. Otherwise it is a waste of time to explain your real life to us, or anybody else, on the Internet. I may have my own "success" story too but in case I wrote it on the Internet hiding behind my pen-name (Ben Madadi) I will only be ridiculed.
Dear Parkhash, If I
by Payam on Sun Sep 02, 2007 10:38 PM PDTDear Parkhash,
If I start answering all your questions and comments, again we get into a back-and-forth loop. I write you some and please, after that I want to get out of this discussion.
From your writing, I can see you have a bright and analytical mind. Your writing style reminds me of Noam Chomsky. I also appreciate the fact that you have not used even a single insulting or inappropriate phrase. At least I can show your writing to my wife.
I fail to see which part of my story is "too good to be true". The study on shcolarship part, the bankruptcy, having no money for dinner, or risking my whole life to build a tech company!
You are right on the spot. I do not travel much, unless it is a major issue like our upcoming product launch. It is an arrangement I have with my board and senior management team during last three years. During formative years, I had to travel a lot but almost exclusively inside California. Even then, I would delegate overseas trips to others. It is primarily for my family. None of us (me or my wife) have really any extended family here so the relationship between the four of us is very special. As hard a person as I am, I know that I won't survive loss of my family.
Lack of travel on my side, also creates more opportunities for our management and up-and-coming talent to present, talk, and network in the market. This also prepares our younger talent to gain more responsibility early and ability to move up faster. This has also resulted in a very low staff turn-over which is critical to the success of our company.
And in terms of my personal time being put into this blog, you may have noticed that it is weekend and even CEOs can have a life! Plus, an author (on this blog) named Jigsaw, kindly gave me a poem which my wife loves. When my wife is happy, everything is worth it.
And about my education, that was the best I could do. I went there because it simply provided full financial support. And you can not get admission or financial support from Stanford by a letter from your local Mosque! Still I am quite connected to Stanford. It is a major place of hiring.
Even more, education has not much correlation with success in business. Many other very successful Iranians have not attended very highly ranked (e.g., top 10) universities at all. M. Ejabat, currently CEO of Zhone has attended California state university. Mr Allai, co-founder of Centillium, has attended universities is East coast. The very luminary Mr. Kamran Elahian, one of valley's most decorated serial entrepreneurs has attended Utah. I have successful CEO friends who have attended universities only in India.
And about my marriage. Well, what can I say. You don't marry Germans, especially if they were good looking. I am sure you don't need advice though.
Nice talking to you.
That is fine. Does it make
by Payam on Sun Sep 02, 2007 08:30 PM PDTThat is fine. Does it make any difference if you think I am a phony?
But I like what I have achieved with you. Look at your first posting and the words and phrases you used there, and look at you current post :)
If you seek closely, you will find my material there. As I said, I want to get out of this discussion, since it was not supposed to be about me originally.
Ben, Even in the absense
by Payam on Sun Sep 02, 2007 06:57 PM PDTBen,
Even in the absense of anonymity, in our daily lives, what you say is absolutely true.
I was the kid with no money (middle class background) who came here and was appreciated because of what I could do, which was in fact my content. Appreciation was in the form of scholarship. I started this company also based on what I could do. Again, in business world, I was a kid with no money who knew how to design complicated machineries. However, this time appreciation has come in the form of money.
I received appreciation even for my failure. I found my wife, without any car, while in debt and subject of gossip and laugher among a good number of dear Iranians (Now he can go and pray to his God, which I did and it worked!).So for instance, I can claim, without any pretense or vainglory, that I am worth this much or even that much (if we go public) and it is worthy because I am that "kid" with no money who relied on tangible appreciation and GOD's help, rather than public opinion, to turn his situation around. and my claim will worth A LOT, because instead of spending money on Ferrari and mansions, I can go and build hospitals in underprivilidged countries, and donate the equipment we have designed in my company to those hospitals for free. Nobody except my wife, ever knows about these activities.
My name is really Payam and yes, I do get what you mean :)
Now, if you let me, I get out of this discussion, since it was originally about a totally different subject :)
Nice to hear from you.
CEO = Condescending Exhibitionist Ogre
by Parkhash on Sun Sep 02, 2007 04:44 PM PDTThese were the words that came to my mind when I read Payam's mini biography - and thank God it was mini. If being humble is supposed to be a virtue, our friend Payam has very little share of it. But lack of humility is not what makes Mr Payam's story too good to be true. It is not so common for a God fearing good behaving muslim to show off his wealth, his academic achievements, his physical magnetism, and describing his wife's figure in such terms as a 'stunner' and measure it down the nearest centimeter. It is also not so convincing to read that such a successful entreprenuer has not left the company of his school teacher's wife for more than a day - unless he owns the school where his wife works for I can't imagine any school would let a teacher to miss more than a day on a non-school related leave! But perhaps our great businessman has not travelled for business outside his home town for more than a day - which again is a little unusual! I also find it rather difficult to find a businessman of Payam's supposed standards to have so much time on his hands to get into such arguemnts over the name of his first univeristy. And on this issue, while I agree with Ghool that the true title of that place was Aryamehr University of Technology, I am not too bothered to see those students who graduated post-1979 to refer to their place of study as Sharif university. After all there must be distinction between those studied there in its glory days in the pre-Islamic era and those who, like Payam, entered the place under the relaxed conditions of the Islamic regime, when all you needed was a letter of reference from your local mosque's mullah. As for Mr Payam's Stanford degrees, I must say that Stanford's reputation, as well as that of many other such institutions, is in their first degrees when the selection procedures are much harder and less subjective. This the period when a student's bones are made and they go through formative years. Mr Payam is a product of Sharif Vaghefi and not Stanford - and his use of language shows it too! Finally Payam's version of Islam sounds familair. As this Farsi proverb suggests: "ageh emam hossein shaid shod, vasseh azadarash bad nashod." This is the so called Jigooli Islam. The same kind of Islam the supporters of Shariati were following. The same kind of Islam that fooled hundreds of thousands of the uninitiated type to think that the IRI was to going to uphold its principles. No thanks Payam, your version of Islam has long passed its sell-by date. We no longer need Islamic pianists who are married to German stunners! They play out of tune and they play the wrong notes. And as for the German stunners, the last time Germany won the Miss World tiltle was 1980! Sorry Payam - better luck next time :)
Payam, Unfortunately
by flovius on Sun Sep 02, 2007 04:40 PM PDTPayam,
Unfortunately you cannot be taken seriously.
Investigations with the Stanford Alum. Assoc., and searches of the
relevant medical literature fail to verify or to support your story and
claims.
You are a phony and a fraud. If you are not, prove it. Show some
convincing documentation.
Also, your defense of islam is not exactly Ph.D. caliber: It consists of
three very brief sentences, in which you say absolutely nothing,- about
as vacuous, lame and meaningless as can be: Very inconsistent with
being a devout moslem you claim to be: PHONY, like the rest of your
story and claims.
read some thing
by mrclass on Sun Sep 02, 2007 02:55 PM PDTinteresting. reading playboy is more worthy than reading Quran! (yak) It is Aryameher not sharif. it's about time for people to call things by it's apropriate name not a terrorist or islamo facist name that these a*holes have given to all the institutions in iran now and days.
To Mr Payam
by Ben Madadi on Sun Sep 02, 2007 02:39 PM PDTSir, as you know that the Internet allows you to be anonymous, so it also allows CONTENT to be appreciated and renders pretense worthless. For instance I can claim that I am worth $500 million but my claim will be worth NOTHING. But a kid with no money who knows how to write, draw, etc on the Internet will be appreciated. I hope you get what I mean ;)
don't mention it!
by jigsaw on Sun Sep 02, 2007 11:24 AM PDTYou're more than welcome. My brother is married to a German as well. I love her to pieces and her family.
Thank you. My wife just saw
by Payam on Sun Sep 02, 2007 10:12 AM PDTThank you. My wife just saw the poem and she has asked me to print it, frame it, and put it in our bedroom so every morning she reads it out loud into my ears, with her German accent superimposed on English! She is asking me to thank you.
Thank you very much for the
by Payam on Sun Sep 02, 2007 09:40 AM PDTThank you very much for the advice. Your writing has significantly improved since your last posting. Now, I can take you seriously.
1 - Well, they are by-products of human brain. But yes, you are also right.
2 - Yes, that is right. If there were too original, we would go bankrupt quickly!
3 - Oh dear, this one is very arguable.
4 - We have quite a good number of carefully handpicked Medical doctors as part of our 400+ R&D team and their opinion is different from yours. We rely on their opinions because we pay them very well. They also know that I stretch their ears, if necessary quite hard, should they don't do a good job!
5 - ""Poor country"" mainly refers to Africa. IRI is rich and if they want our machines, they will have to pay for it. These are not token gifts either. They are priced into million-dollar territory. So there is no insult involved. There is no laughable aspect into a business that holds right to over 2500 US patents either. And Yes, you are right. Iran must be a very prosperous country, but regrettably it is not, and apart from helping individuals, there is very little I can do about it, despite the intense personal desire.
6 - It has worked for us this way. Both of us are quite content with the situation. If you do according to your advice, I am sure you will be successful. We live in a world of opinions. For example, a few weeks ago, in a social gathering, several Iranian ladies expressed professional opinion that I should not have married my wife since she lacks persian beauty, and that she is just a "dumb" school teacher. They also complained that my wife was looking down on them. They were right about their criticism. In regards to her looks, she is like a twin sister to Elle Mcpherson (with a much more modest dress code!), who also lacks persian beauty. In regards to looking down on people, since my wife in high heels is easy over 180 cm, while those ladies were pushing 150 maximum, she had to look down (literally), to be able to listen to them, while being called dumb. She jokingly argued that she is not probably that dumb since she managed to catch Payam, while two of those ladies demanded Mercedes and Diamonds, when I was bankrupt! I love her sense of humor. As you see, we live in a world full of contradictory opinions and ideas.
7. Islam does not really have a form. Its teachings are pretty simple and straight. It is people of Middle East who give it form according to their own interests.
Payam, 1: Both
by flovius on Sun Sep 02, 2007 07:58 AM PDTPayam,
1: Both machines are by-products of Westren science and technology,
derived from the Western sixteenth century scientific revolution
based on secularism and dedication to truths and scientific facts.
2: Neither is very original, since new and improved systems are under
development throughout the Western scientific world.
3: The "moslem ceo" is the beneficiary of a Western education and
is lucky to be living in the highly creative and innovative American
culture.
4: Detecting multiple tumor markers is useless for the early diagnosis
of cancer, when it is curable. As a monitoring system it is
redundant, unnecessary and a waste of resources.
5: The general availability and quality of health care for the vast
majority of the Iranian people in the IRI are minimal to non-
existent. The wealthy get medical care abroad, while Iran's
wealth and resources are stolen, squandered and given away to
various foreigners. Token "gifts" to "poor moslems" are insul-
ting and laughable, when Iran should be one of the most prosperous
nations on the face of the earth.
6. The "moslem ceo" should have converted to christianity, instead
of converting his German wife to islamoshit.
7. Islam in its present tyrannical, oppressive and repressive form
is TOTALLY unacceptable to Westerners or any other civilized
people of the world!
...
by Payam on Sun Sep 02, 2007 01:38 AM PDT...
I have a feeling that you
by jigsaw on Sat Sep 01, 2007 10:42 PM PDTI have a feeling that you feel guilty about being successful. Don't! You deserve your blessings and you should enjoy them. The meaning of success is not how much fortune you've amassed but what you've overcome in your life.
Here's one of my favorite poems by Dr. Kent Keith which I often have to remember when dealing with people who are difficult to deal with:
"People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and true enemies;
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, they may cheat you;
Be forthright anyway.
What you spent years building, they may destroy overnight;
Build anyway.
The good you do today, they often will forget tomorrow
Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it will never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them, Anyway.