The writings below were inspired by this blog from Fesenjoon.
The United States Oath of Allegiance (that’s the oath that all you naturalized U.S. citizens took to become citizens) states:
"I hereby declare, on oath, that I absolutely and entirely renounce and abjure all allegiance and fidelity to any foreign prince, potentate, state or sovereignty, of whom or which I have heretofore been a subject or citizen; that I will support and defend the Constitution and laws of the United States of America against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I will bear arms on behalf of the United States when required by the law; that I will perform noncombatant service in the armed forces of the United States when required by the law; that I will perform work of national importance under civilian direction when required by the law; and that I take this obligation freely without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; so help me God."
I’m sure you all remember the day you took this oath. For most non-Iranian people who become U.S. citizens, that day is a joyous, happy day. For some—not all—Iranians, it’s a day where they can brag about their “zerangi” and prepare to file petitions to bring the rest of their family over to the U.S. Nothing wrong with--except for the fact that now that you have put your John Hancock (or, if you prefer, Abdullah Islaminejad) on that form, you are legally obligated to do certain things. One of those pesky little things is the obligation to bear arms on behalf of the U.S. This means that in case there is a war and a draft, you will have to put down the chelo kabob dish, say goodbye to the summer vacation and cheap opium parties (and more chelo kabob) in Iran, get out of your leased Mercedes and mosey on to the nearest recruitment center and be shipped to whatever area of the world the U.S. government thinks is appropriate for you to be--and fight for your new country. That’s right. You’re now an American. And it’s not “golabi” or “velesh kon baba, ki halesho dareh” type thing. You’re in it for the long haul.
Now let’s say that IR and its supporters’ wishful thinking actually comes true and the U.S. gets engaged in a war with Iran. See, in a democratic system like the U.S., there is a debate process about this sort of thing. But once the debate is over, and the decision is made to go to war, you can’t argue and “safsateh” about it any longer. The time for debate is over. Your representatives in the government have voted. It’s time to put the gear on and suit up--and shut up. What would you do if and when the time comes? Hide in Canada? Are all of you all of a sudden going to become “conscientious objectors?” Hey, Japanese Americans had to fight in WWII-some of them while their family members were interned in internment camps. Sen. Daniel Inouye had to do it. His parents were Japanese immigrants. He volunteered at Pearl Harbor and then fought the Japanese and was heavily wounded, receiving the Medal of Honor. Many German Americans fought in WWII. John Abizaid is Arab American. He was Centcom’s commander during the war in Iraq.
The scenario is one that actually happened in Iran as well. During the Iran / Iraq war, we knew a family who was Iranian / Iraq. The wife was Iraqi and her husband was Arab Iranian who also had relatives in Iraq. Their son fought for Iran, knowing that most of his family was Iraqi. There were many other examples like that.
But let’s say that you’re too old to fight. Or that you’re openly gay (hey, they haven’t repealed “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” yet) or you have some kind of a medical issue that prevents you from becoming a soldier. The other part of your oath says that you “will perform noncombatant service in the armed forces of the United States when required by the law; that [you] will perform work of national importance under civilian direction when required by the law …” That could mean spying you know. It could also mean translation service for U.S troops, making shells for tanks, etc. How are you going to get out of those things? Remember, no one has forced you to be a U.S. citizen. I assume that you all had green cards before you become citizens, which didn’t place the obligations of citizenship on you. Why did you take on this legal obligation? So you could stay in Iran for more than six months and not have to worry about it? So that you could bring your cousin here? Too bad. Whatever your reason was, that whole citizenship thing comes with a lot of baggage. So, here’s what I propose to you fake U.S. citizens: give it up. I mean your citizenship. It’s not too late. It can still be done. In fact, I have taken the liberty of preparing the following form letter that you all could use:
To: U.S. Dept. of Homeland Security
U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Service
(insert your local office address)
Dear Sir / Madam,
My name is (Hassn Hossein / Fatemeh Soghra) Iranipour. My alien number is (insert your immigration number). I filed an application for citizenship on (date). On (date) I appeared at your office and took the citizenship oath. But now I realize that I no longer want to be a U.S. citizen. This is because I am (insert one or more of the following as they apply to you: an America hater; an IR lover; a coward; I don’t consider the U.S. to be my country; I am a “cause head” and hating the U.S. is my main cause; I am a leftover Iranian Marxist; I love Hassan Nasrollah; I love Ayatollah Khamenei; I love Osama Bin Laden and believe that he is a freedom fighter). I am also a liar because I did not tell you about any of this when I took my citizenship oath. But never mind that. In our culture we do these things. We think we are clever. But, where was I? Oh, yes, can I get my green card back please? Attached are my American passport and my certificate of citizenship. I am returning it to you…and no, I have not reported it lost and gotten a new one.
PS- how log can I stay out of the country in Iran now that I only have a green card? I have 4 pieces of land and six houses there that I need to rent / repair / sell.
Sincerely yours;
(Hassn Hossein / Fatemeh Soghra) Iranipour
See how easy that was? Now, for once in your lives, print the letter and send it to your local immigration office. Consider it a charity work for the new year, the charity being our honesty toward a nation that took you in and embraced you when your homeland was giving you the middle finger.
Blog photo courtesy of Fesenjoon.
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Anonymous
by Parthianshot91 on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:37 PM PSTThe middle class itself isn't the majority in Iran. Most people lived in borderline poverty. I'm guessing you've never been to the other parts of Iran other than Northern Tehran. Like for example, we lived in basically borderline poverty, still had a plasma t.v though, lol. My cousins in Tehran were rich, though they didn't and still don't go after I-phones or I-pads. There's probabely something wrong with your cousins, so I suggest instead of judging others, fix your own family first.
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"They are not afraid of the ideology alone, but of the detemination and will of the men behind it"
Well hey, Artimis, tell us
by Sargord Pirouz on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:35 PM PSTWell hey, Artimis, tell us all about your US military experience instead of the faux offended'ness.
AO, that's actually not that out of the ordinary. In fact, many US military veterans go on to become civil servants and encourage their kids to enlist. Another of my 1/4 Iranian nephew's uncles is a top level law enforcement official for the state, and he is encouraging of such.
In your case, perhaps this is symptomatic of the retreat of the American middle class. I tell you, I come from an American military family and of those that volunteered, being economically underprivileged was the motivating factor. It also played a role for those that were conscripted, as well.
Anonymous
by Parthianshot91 on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:38 PM PSTYou're like a broken record. I'm pretty young, my parents came here when I was 8. I'm currently in college. I will go back in the future, 15 years at best, much less if the regime changes. And what part of me taking advantage of the opportunities presented to me, stealing your jobs, and taking your wimmens did you not understand? I simply don't give a piss what Americans think of me. There are millions of immigrants who think like me. No loyalty to America what so ever, why should we, out of guilt?
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"They are not afraid of the ideology alone, but of the detemination and will of the men behind it"
//www.youtube.com/watch
by Arthimis on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:26 PM PST//www.youtube.com/watch?v=f7J6dRkJjOI
First of all Sargord (Soldier Zero), Take that (above slap)and throw down boy! Or else you will stand (for a little while) and bleed... trust me that would happen to you someday soon, if you don't repent and change!!
Second, How do you know that I didn't sign up and fight for America already?? I don't have to prove shit to you and terrorists like you...
You don't know anything because you are nothing but a lost soul who has fallen into the most insecure and fearful camp due to your own sheer ignorance and fearfulness! If America was like your beloved Islamic Republic, you would not be leaving free comments here in America! (That is if you are in fact living in the U.S. and not in Hezbollah centers in Lebanon)
Let me break the news to you! You are not accepted by any true American or Iranian no matter what your blood line is coming from!!! You are the enemy of both countries and worse the enemy of humanity!!!
Now, as I said before, "Throw down boy! and go to sleep!! LOL
Actually no
by Anonymous Observer on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:24 PM PSTYour cousins must be kids of bazaris.
Sons and daughters of middle class civil servants. That's what's really strange.
So, why didn't you go back?
by Anonymous Observer on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:23 PM PSTYou came here and realized it was not the land of opportunity that you thought it would be. So why didn't you cut your losses and return home ASAP?
Anonymous
by Parthianshot91 on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:22 PM PSTMost people in Iran don't even know wtf a I-pad or an I-phone is. They struggle day by day just to get by, and don't have time for such garbage. Rich places like parts of northern tehran isn't your average Iran.
Your cousins must be kids of bazaris.
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"They are not afraid of the ideology alone, but of the detemination and will of the men behind it"
We do not come here to become Americans!
by Parthianshot91 on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:19 PM PSTI'll tell you people what I told my American friend. We immigrants don't come to this country just to become Americans, we come here cause of the opportunities presented to us. Blame it on the advertsment about America. You have no idea what they told us about America and how awsome it was gonna be, lol. When we came here my parents had to work their arses off, much worse than in Iran for us to even get by. Americans didn't give me this life, my family and I myself did. I don't owe crap to them. Not to mention the funding of the mullahs by America, I will never ever forget that as long as I live.
If it wasn't for them I wouldn't even be in this degenerate place in the first place. You can't pull the guilt card on me.
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"They are not afraid of the ideology alone, but of the detemination and will of the men behind it"
Parthianshot91 - I beg to differ
by Anonymous Observer on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:13 PM PSTI agree that materialism in Iran has increased, not to the level of America's of-cource
Dude, are you kidding me? My relatives in Iran had iPads before they were cool here. And I tell you--most of my relatives in Iran had flat panels before I, or anyone I know here, had them.
Arayana Jaan
by Anonymous Observer on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:11 PM PSTI don't expect you to fight. You're not a citizen and / or do not live here. And your cause for Iran is definitely a noble one.
Anonymous
by Parthianshot91 on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:10 PM PSTMaterialism as in being obssesed with money, only caring about what's "In" today. The Average American would just die if they didn't get their fookin I-phone 3g, or their I-pad. That kind of mentality leads to a cess-pool kind of society. Plus, I agree that materialism in Iran has increased, not to the level of America's of-cource, but it still has increased cause this regime lacks culture. They're not encouraging our own Persian/Iranian culture, people don't want their sharia islam, so they look to the west. I've said this hundreds of times and I will keep on saying it til you people get it.
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"They are not afraid of the ideology alone, but of the detemination and will of the men behind it"
I know Mark!
by Anonymous Observer on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:09 PM PSTThis is shaping up to be quite a humorous thread.
It was inevitable when the main clown--you--showed up. :-)
I have to hand it to you, AO
by Sargord Pirouz on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:05 PM PSTThis is shaping up to be quite a humorous thread.
NO!
by Aryana-Vaeja on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:08 PM PSTI would not fight for America. But I would fight to have the Farr/Xvarnah restored to Iran, meaning I would fight to have the rightful King and Sovereign of my motherland restored to the throne in order for freedom and justice bestowed from heaven to return once again to the land of my blood and the land of my ancestors. Any real Iranian would do the same: they would fight for the return of the Farr/Xvarnah and nothing else!
What kind of enthusiasts of the Shahnameh are you people? Have you taken no lessons from Ferdowsi? Shame on you, fighting for America! Fight for Holy Iran against its ahrimanic occupiers NOT for America.
-
May we be amongst those who are to bring about the transfiguration of the Earth - Yasna XXX 9
Well Artimis...
by Sargord Pirouz on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:02 PM PSTAmerica was attacked in 2001. Why didn't you sign up?
Yet another chicken-hawk...
Parthianshot91 - You want to see materialism?
by Anonymous Observer on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:02 PM PSTTake a trip to Iran. I can't keep up with the junk that my relatives there constantly buy.
Arthimis- You have the right attitutude
by Anonymous Observer on Mon Dec 20, 2010 09:01 PM PSTIt's great to see Iranian Americans who appreciate what this country has given them. It's good to see that not all of us are namak-nashnaas ingrates.
I will fight for America if
by Arthimis on Mon Dec 20, 2010 08:57 PM PSTI will fight for America if she is ever attacked because they took me in at age 19 when my own old country or shall I say dictatorship government (Islamic Republic) forced me out! I was stuck for 2 years in Germany until The U.S. granted me an asylum! when I had nowhere to go!!! So, you bet you, I will fight for America because I love America!
lol
by Sargord Pirouz on Mon Dec 20, 2010 08:55 PM PSTGood one, Parthian. My American grandfather accused my dad of the same thing. He told my mom why in the world did she have to marry a foreigner?
But after a while, he warmed up to him.
My Iranian dad, on the other hand, was awestruck by my physically mighty American grandfather and rightly so.
I have a present for you
by Arthimis on Mon Dec 20, 2010 08:50 PM PSTI have a present for you Sargord joon:-)
//www.youtube.com/watch?v=f7J6dRkJjOI
That's what will happen to the Antari and entire I.R. camp at the end! You want to be slapped like that? :-)
Now, go to sleep!
PS. AO jaan, great blog and cartoon! So true... LOL Thank you... :-)
What is there to figth for in the first place?
by Parthianshot91 on Mon Dec 20, 2010 08:46 PM PSTWhat does America have that is worth fighting for? To expand materialism and turn the world into a un-cultured toilet?
Count me out buddy. I'm just here to take advantage of the opportunity that is given to me, steal your job and take your wimmens, just another typical immigrant :P
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"They are not afraid of the ideology alone, but of the detemination and will of the men behind it"
AO, I stand corrected
by Sargord Pirouz on Mon Dec 20, 2010 08:28 PM PSTso we have some things in common, after all.
Samsam my borther - Gol gofti
by Anonymous Observer on Mon Dec 20, 2010 07:49 PM PSTYou said it brother:
These areOmmatie hustler nomads & in the tradition of their multi generational upbringing since the time of Omar & later self indulgence kharabatism have no country no nation no loyalty but that of their own survival. Fence sitting Omarus.
couldn't have said it better. Unprincipled hezb-e-baad low lives. That's what they are.
u kidding me bro?
by SamSamIIII on Mon Dec 20, 2010 07:43 PM PSTWould they fight for america?..never mind AO jaan!. ask em;, "would you fight for anything. period" ?. These are Ommatie hustler nomads & in the tradition of their multi generational upbringing since the time of Omar & later self indulgence kharabatism have no country no nation no loyalty but that of their own survival. Fence sitting Omarus. These folks shed more skins in a week than a te havana hooker does with condoms in a life time. They wil always choose the path of least resistance be it Omar's lap monkey or Taymour's bozmajeh or mullah's PR Bii-aarrs or even Obama's enlightened Greenists...they shall play the part so long as there is a get away car at the ready & a convenient exit door. just like the bourcieh basijii bradar crowd who incidently all end up staying the F*** in land of their great satan after grad. So no, they will not fight for anything but they shall suck it dry before they jiffy..
Cheers pilgrim !!!
Path of Kiaan Resurrection of True Iran Hoisting Drafshe Kaviaan //iranianidentity.blogspot.com //www.youtube.com/user/samsamsia
Thank you again Fesenjoon
by Anonymous Observer on Mon Dec 20, 2010 07:39 PM PSTThat blog photo cracks me up every time I look at it. As I mentioned at the bottom of the blog, the cartoon is Fesenjoon's handiwork. What a great job!! Very creative!! Fesenjoon is not only a great writer, he's also a great cartoonist. An artist all the way around.
AO
by Sargord Pirouz on Mon Dec 20, 2010 06:26 PM PSTSo what's stopping you from running straight toward the local US armed forces recruiting office?
BTW, CO status is irrelevant to current induction conditions as we field a strictly professional force.
My 1/4 Iranian nephew enlisted in the Marine Corps. Anyone in your family enlist- ever? Bigmouth?
So yeah, when you or even a family member of yours enlists, than we'll talk. But until then, quit with the chicken-hawking. You're only making a fool of yourself, something not uncommon among the cut and run'ers still waving the Lion-Puss flags.
Service Guarantees Citizenship!
by Anonymous Observer on Mon Dec 20, 2010 06:17 PM PST//www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7-PQIuWwLo
From one of my favorite movies.
Service in the U.S. armed forces is the hallmark of patriotism, and in my opinion, a prerequisite of an immigrant community into the society. Every single ethnic group in this country has demonstrated honor and valor in serving their adopted homeland...except for our community, at least in significant numbers up to this point.
"conscientious objector" is--IMHO--a cop out and a coward's way out. Many people don't like to serve if there's a draft. But they respect their fellow countrymen and women, suck it up and go do their duty. That's the only fair thing to do.
Some of these jokes aimed at
by Sargord Pirouz on Mon Dec 20, 2010 06:19 PM PSTSome of these jokes aimed at myself are kinda funny, like the Hogans Heroes one. But Darius, you should know that my American great uncle was killed in Alsace liberating your country in 1944. So that's not so funny.
Simorgh, you're too quick in jumping to conclusions about me and my family. You're also under-educated about American social history. But just so you know, my Iranian grandmother did not commit to American residency and lived in Iran for nearly her entire life. And my father never became an American citizen, preferring his default status of green card holder for all the years he lived in America. I know you try very hard to defame my American ancestry, Simorgh, but this is something that's unrelated to you immigrants from Iran, so it's not worth my time trying to educated you folks, content in your own ignorance and foreigner-type ways.
Khar, I appreciate your candidness. First let me state that it doesn't pleasure me to out the many anti-Iran self-exiled expats on this forum. In fact, this kind of behavior is a source of embarrassment , more than anything else. But you treat me in a civil manner and I will reciprocate. You treat me in a foul manner, and I will respond by telling you like it is, with nothing held back.
Regarding America, of course I love my country. And I have a fond appreciation for my Iranian heritage. That is why I advocate rapprochement efforts be made by the US toward the Islamic Republic of Iran, for I accept Iran today for what it is, politically and socially. Of course, since these efforts are not being made in earnest, I am critical of US ME policy. Don't ever confuse differences in policy with differences in national allegiance, something many of you emotionally jaded folks are so eager to engage in when it comes to your point of origin.
بابا ولش کنید این ستوان بازنده رو
Anonymous ObserverMon Dec 20, 2010 06:03 PM PST
حالا یک غلطی کرد. ولش کنید بره دنبال خر چرونیش. البته با عرض احترام فراوان به جناب پرزیدنت محبوب و بزرگوار این سایت.
T-SHIRT
by maziar 58 on Mon Dec 20, 2010 05:32 PM PSTIf he knews what you're talking about
He'll probably comes out saying : BEEN THERE,DONE THAT & GOT THE T-SHIRT. ZAAT ZIYAD Maziar