Ari Siletz

This is the sad story of the Iranian multi-millionaire in exile, Mr. Behzad Honarkoor, missing out on a business deal with a ten-fold return on investment. His name has been changed in the story to protect the innocent, and perhaps "he" represents more than one wealthy diaspora Iranian. Every other name, dollar figure, location and event is real, even though the Iranian tragic hero and the dialogue have been dramatized.

Back in 1990, London art dealer Oliver Hoare approached Honarkoor to sell a Shahnameh manuscript for about $13 million. "Zeki!" said Honarkoor, "for $13 million I could by a whole BMW dealership." But Mr. Hoare explained that this manuscript is the magnificent 16th century Shah Tahmasp Shahnameh that used to have 258 paintings and 759 illuminated pages.

"Used to have?" replied Honarkoor. "Are you trying to sell me a tasaadofi manuscript!?"

"It’s the way with most illustrated Shahnamehs," Hoare said apologetically. "Only 118 paintings remain intact in the work. The rest were torn out piece by piece by a previous owner, the late Mr. Houghton. But what remains still has huge value."

"It’s worth more if you sell it for parts?" Honarkoor asked eagerly.

"Unfortunately Mr. Houghton felt that way. Very sad really. You see, every great artist of the golden age of Persian miniatures participated in this manuscript project, which took twenty years to complete. Imagine every great impressionist between 1850 and 1870 contributing to a single work. Renoir, Degas, Monet, Cezanne, Cassat, Manet…"

"Yes, Michelangelo, Picasso…" added Honarkoor who had a PhD in something.

Houghton grimaced painfully and cleared his throat. "However, since the masterpiece belongs to your heritage, I trust you will not think of it as a wrecked salvage car and keep it in one piece."

"Of course. Ask anyone how proud I am of my heritage. Just look around you."

Hoare scanned Honarkoor’s guest room and counted at least twelve Poet with Saaghi illustrations. While Hoare viewed the artwork, Honarkoor was busy calculating that if he bought the 118 illustrations wholesale for $13 million, then retailed each one for $200,000 he would make over 10 million. "Sound like a good deal," he finally told Hoare.

"So you will buy the manuscript and promise to keep it intact?"

"Do I have to promise in writing?"

"Well, Mr. Hougton’s son has some concerns," Hoare said diplomatically. "Houghton Jr. is somewhat of a culture lover."

Honarkoor became irritable, "It’s like selling me a piece of land and telling me I can’t subdivide it. You think I’m a donkey? "

"The thought never occurred to me. We were hoping you and perhaps a few of your wealthy patriotic friends would pool your resources and buy the manuscript to donate to the Metropolitan Museum. It’s a huge tax break and you would never have to prove your patriotism again. The late Mr. Houghton himself donated 78 pages to the museum and came out way ahead in taxes. With your 118 page donation, the manuscript fragment at the Metropolitan would be almost complete."

"Boro Gomsho," barked Honarkoor and threw Oliver Hoare out of his mansion yelling names after him. "Martikeh Kolaahbardar!

Undaunted, Oliver Hoare still had a strong feeling that somehow he could get Iranians interested in the purchase. Then a brilliant idea struck him. The Tehran Museum of Contemporary Art had hundreds of valuable paintings of nudes worth millions. They were worthless to the Islamic Republic who could never display them. So he got on the phone with Iran’s Cultural Heritage Organization.

"Hello, is this Iran’s Cultural Heritage Organization?"

"Yes, what do you want?"

"Would you like to buy the Shah Tahmasp Shahnameh from me?"

"No, we don’t have any money."

"Then what do you do over there?"

"Collect salaries."

"Then how about you trade one of your nudes for the Shahnameh?"

"Sure, how much is your Shahnameh worth?"

"About $13 million and change."

"Lets see here." The Iranian clerk at the other end of the line flipped through the catalog of the Tehran Contemporary Art Museum. "We have a Willem de Kooning here for about that price."

"Which one?"

"Don’t know, I’m not allowed to look at her. She is doing bad hejaabi on the canvas. Oh sabr kon, here’s the name of the painting, its called Woman III."

Oh my God!! The art dealer screamed in his mind. "I’ve got customers lined up around the block for that whore. We’ve got a deal!"

So in July 1994, Oliver Hoare stood on the tarmac of Vienna International Airport, Shahnameh in hand, waiting for President Rafsanjani’s pivate jet to fly in the nude for the secret swap. In November of 2006, Woman III sold for $137.5 million!

As for Mr. Honarkoor, I hear his real estate business isn’t doing too well these days.

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Top image: Woman III (1953)  by Willem de Kooning 

Bottom image: Detail from Jashn e Sadeh from the Shah Tahmasp Shahnameh, 16th century.