What would Solomon do?


by Fred

A simplified reality based hypothetical situation with questions at the end.

Lets imagine a couple who after many tries and failures finally at great cost succeed in having a much wanted baby. Despite having been born in the dead of winter since conception took place during the Spring time, Bahar in Persian, he is lovingly nicknamed Son Of Bahar, SOB for short.

Lets further imagine after a short period of neighborhood-wide jubilation the proud parents and neighbors notice SOB displaying very odd, destructive behavior. At first everyone justifies it as a natural response to his less than ideal environment, aunts, uncles and cousins make excuses for every obviously very bad behavior of his. But with time as SOB gains strength so does the frequency of his violent outbursts which progressively and very quickly gets to the point that everyone is scared stiff of the formerly much beloved, long awaited for SOB.

Eventually the young man routinely grabs any neighbor be it man, woman or child who disobeys his increasingly irrational orders, either ties them to a tree and beats the bejesus out of them in public, gouge their eye out, chop a limb, rape a few and string up few more from the Utility pole or construction crane. Lets finally imagine after SOB begins to do the same things to few of his quarrelsome cousins who thinking they could change him in one way or another had been his little helpers, fearing for their own lives most of the rest either flee or stop working for him.

Now SOB is left with frightened parents and neighbors who are in perpetual mourning for some loved ones who SOB has tortured, raped or murdered, needless to say they now hate every fiber of SOB’s being.  

The question is should the parents and neighbors:

Knowing a beating and worst is SOB’s usual response, for the umpteenth time try to talk some sense to him?


Let him be and hope that he will eventually either gets tired of raping/murdering and will grow out of it, or someone hopefully benevolent from somewhere emerges to replace him and till then make do as best as they can?


Knowing the other neighborhoods which have begun to fear for their own safety and are considering preemptively attacking the entire neighborhood, ask them for help to get rid of SOB themselves and in the process save their beloved old neighbors and neighborhood?  

What are the parents and neighbors of a formerly much-vaunted child who has grown up to be an incorrigible, unrepentant serial rapist/murder to do? Does it take the Wisdom of Solomon to decide?


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I Have a Crush on Alex Trebek

Solomon would join NationalReview.com

by I Have a Crush on Alex Trebek on

He would also join AIPAC. He would support attacks on Iran. He would send the serial rapists to GTMO!Fred you answer your own questions silly man


The West has been operating

by vildemose on

The West has been operating on the assumption that stricter sanctions against Iran will undermine the regime of the ayatollahs. However, Iranian opposition leader Ataollah Mohajerani thinks differently.

Mohajerani, the former Iranian vice president for parliamentary affairs, who also served as Iran’s culture minister under Mohammed Khatami, said Saturday that “a stronger middle class will result in a stronger opposition. Additional sanctions will mainly bolster the army and the current regime, and deprive the opposition of financial support necessary for growth.”

The Iranian official, who now lives in Europe, spoke Saturday at a conference of the Washington Institute in Leesburg, Virginia. “Sanctions will help the regime neutralize the opposition,” he said. “Three months have passed since the elections, and that is not enough time.”

A military strike against Iran will have a similar effect, Mohajerani argued. “An attack won’t result in a regime change,” he said. “If the solution was military, the problem in Afghanistan would have been resolved already, after eight years of war. A military attack in Iran will deal a death blow to the opposition and strengthen the regime. Iran is not Iraq, nor is it Afghanistan.”


Bijan A M


by Bijan A M on

The wise king that he is, will probably talk the parents and neighbors into destroying and eliminating this evil SOB, and adopting a new son who king solomon knew would care about neighbors, parents and step-parents alike.

After finding the right replacement for SOB, the parents and neighbors accepted any help they could get, to eliminate SOB.


you are saying Iran is "SOB" ?

by Anonymous8 on

i think you have the story wrong. there was a baby in the King solomon story, and the false mother wanted to cut it in half.

but the other mother would rather give it up than to harm it.

if Iran is the baby, which mother are you?


The answer is between the notes...

by Ostaad on

The rule has always been that it takes an SOB to deal with another SOB.

In my humble opinion, the best solution to the this problem is to put Fred, who can be refereed to as "the Singing-SOB", and the SOB-in-question in a room with padded walls. Then let the Singing-SOB to sing inspirational songs from his AIPAC-supplied sheet music day in and day out until the SOB-in-question starts singing in chorus. In the meantime the Singing-SOB's music teachers will starve the SOB-in-question's family member with "airtight sanctions" as a punishment for raising such an unruly child. And If that does not work, the Singing-SOB's music teachers should be strongly encouraged and bomb everyone in the neighborhood!

In other words, the Singing-SOB wants to serve his music teachers the best "omelet" for breakfast, so the Singing-SOB doesn't care how many eggs he has to break.

Who needs Solomon, just read the "real" lyrics between the notes!