GitDoun

I still don't get it

Your example of old man in Dehkhoda bookstore has one very distinct characteristic. He is old! Imagine a 50 or 60 year old or even a 70 year old who married an Iranian woman way back when and after spending let's say the last 5-10 years of their marriage in agony and depression they finally called it quits.

Now wouldn't that Columbian or Mexican or Argentinian middle aged cougar seem like hoori from heaven? No really buddy, older Iranian men don't even bother with Iranian women anymore. They go straight for the gutso! Something more fun (to them) more exotic and less nagging (they think).

Now back to you, I still don't get it. Since you say you had the last straw and have given up on Iranian women, I ask again, what does it matter?! Huh? You thought you'd marry and Iranian woman now you don't. Maybe one day you find a nice Iranian woman. Until then don't be sour, don't blame anyone, don't blame your age, don't blame other people's age. Just chill and put that ring on another finger!

why this matters to me.

Some of you have asked why i am concerned about marriage with non-iranians and why does this matter to me. Well simply put i always imagined myself marrying an iranian woman; until recently. Our outlook on life and opinions on issues, to a degree, is influenced by our very own life-experiences. And so having recently dealt with the "last straw to break the camels back"situation regarding iranian woman ; i decided to make a change of plans and explore other options. Though i am relatively young (23) i've always had long deep relationships and have always looked at marriage as a great blessing and mercy from God to be embraced. Not something to be checked off on my things to do list when i'm old and can't go to the dance-club no more. In any event, it was a coincidence that while waiting in line to purchase my book at Dehkhoda Bookstore i overheard a conversation of an iranian man speaking to 4 of his friends? about how his new wife from Colombia. He expressed with a great great joy in his voice, that was hard to ignore, that this new wife of his was so much better than his previous iranian-wife. This intrigued me so i turned my attention to the small circle of men that gathered close to the entrance. After paying for my book I walked over, respectfully interrupted, and introduced myself. I kindly asked if he could narrate his conversation from the beginning. Explaining that i too was fed up with iranian-woman and would like to hear from his life-experiences so that, per-chance, i may learn something of value.  The old man with a smile graciously agreed and so i spent several hours that afternoon in Dehkhoda listening to these men one after another sharing their frustration and anger with iranian woman/ex-wife only to find happiness in a non-iranian woman/wife. And suprisingly their 2nd wife/new marriage were from south american countries. And so why does this matter to me?? Marriage is a weighty thing not to be taken lightly.  It is only beneficial for me to make as many inquiries as possible so that i may make an Informed decision.  This is one Alpha-Male that refuses to be a "kos-lis" to any iranian-woman. i will find another option to these scandalous, two-faced, money-grubbing, arrogant lazy persian-american woman.  ...... i think i have a Misogyny towards iranian woman.

Some motherly advice

If I were to advise my son, I would tell him not to care about the other person's nationality. However, I would not at all encourage him to get involved with an Iranian gal. As an Iranian woman, I can tell you it is true Iranian women are for most part gold diggers, role players, lazy, controlling bitches. I see all the women (young and old) including my own mother and sister that are that way. I'm not because I am "Americanized" and naive in their view.

I think someone mentioned Latino women getting around, Iranian women are no different. They just keep appearances and sew it up and call themselves virgins. Honestly, how many of you women out there have been honest even with your girlfriends and sisters as to the number of men you slept with or despite being married flirt with other men at work and at parties. Yes, petting, oral sex and anal sex do count!

At the end of the day, don't limit yourself to any one nationality or religion. Go out with the gal who attracts you and you feel the chemistry for. Don't rush into anything and enjoy and learn from each and every relationship. Remember, if you are honest and true and treat the other person with dignity and resepect, she will in all likelihood be the same toward you.

I'm not a man but I'll

I'm not a man but I'll answer anyway.

A bunch of dudes on Westwood don't establish a pattern of behavior for the larger Iranian society. However, let's assume that the hypothesis is true. Let's assume that an increasing number of Iranian men, regardless of age, are actually marrying non Iranian women. Could it be because on a day to day basis they come into contact with more non Iranian women? At work, at the book store, at their friend Jack's BBQ party? Or in your case in school? Could it be that traditional marriages are loosening up now and the "ammeh find me a wife and we'll go khastegari" has changed to, "I like that girl, I want to date her"? Because then you can say people aren't restricting themselves to their own nationality for a variety of reasons.

Now, let's say all Irnaian women are vain and gold diggers. Are you saying these men don't go for looks? They would go and marry an Iranian girl because she's so darn ugly? Maybe these men are looking only at a type of Iranian women and only come into contact with a certain type of group...because these men have wierd values to begin with.

In any case why does this even matter? The Iranian ladies, according to you, are moving around too. So everyone's happy.

gitdoun jan

i understand your question and concerns. every opinion you get is going to be very subjective since we all have different experiences in our lives which give different color to what we believe. therefore what ever you hear here please take it with a lump of salt. you can not generalize these things. so to answer your question, i am going to give you my very generalized and warp answer.

as for me, i would not marry an american women. they are very lazy and very selfish. they are pushy and put their husbands down. 

i would not marry hispanics woman because in my experience they like to get around if they ever get the chance. i must add here that most  of the hispanics i have met are not actually married even though they are living with some one and have children. 

i would be very careful with iranian women. they are trustworthy and will not go around but they too are bossy and controlling. if you can find one who is not too superficial and not too much into clothing or hair or long finger nails you may go out with her and see if she is ok

i personally don't like women who use sex to control their men. 

now you may ask who else is left. well my friend don't you despair, asian women in my opinion are quite amiable and may fit the bill. they love to cook and are great in bed. but please avoid the ones who are controlling and act like men in skirt. they also are attentive to their men and tend to take care of them well.

i hope i have been helpful you. :-) 

americanization and Iranian culture

Regarding these Iranians you people talk about in your stereotypes (even though I haven't met any Iranain like this yet) you need to know that these people are a Americanized/westernized minority of idiots. Most Iranians, even in the west, keep true to their culture, and are cultural people..... Don't exaggerate like this.

I think this article is for you

Read please :)

//iranian.com/main/blog/iranianpersianguy/stereotypes-about-persian-iranian-women-and-men

confused

Btw, it's not about protecting these women because we feel bad for them, it's commen sense, LOGIC, because you're simply exaggerating like the rest of the minority of americanized people that the Iranian community ignores, or atleast tries to ignore.

Further more, it just seems like you hang around the wong crowd, now who you hang around is up to you, but as long as you hang around americanizd morons (which are a small minority of Iranians in the Iranian community) then you will experience the same crap. so go and be with true cultured Iranians/Persians, and stop fliping out just because some b!tch or homo barks out of their asses for attention, because by doing the same thing, you're just making things worse.

Ps. latina girls are mostly whores and gold diggers themselves, probabely the biggest sluts in the U.s, after american women ofcource, lol.

Buddy why are you wearing a

Buddy why are you wearing a ring on your thumb?! Not that there is anything wrong with it!

As far as Iranian men marrying non-Iranians in America, well what do you expect? There are not enough Iranian women to go around.

It is like saying, Americans or Europeans or other foreigners living in Iran marry non-Americans or non-Europeans. Get it? If these men were living in Iran they'd marry Iranians because they don't have other choices.

Now my question to you (should you decide to answer it) is; why are you concerned with this issue anyway?

Do you think you can make any changes to these gold-digger Iranian women? I don't think they care for you anyway, one way or another ;-)