Sick dream


Jahanshah Javid
by Jahanshah Javid

I have been sick for the past 24 hours. Last night I had shivers, body ache, and severe diahrrea. (the word "severe" was added for extra grossness, so more people would read this and I would make more money. Let's say that's true. Is it not therefore also true that YOU crave gross stuff? We're even.)

(I can already tell that I would not have written this under normal circumstances. I'll blame it on my sickness.)

So I've been really sick. And I've put tons of chilly sauce on everything I've put into my mouth. So you can imagine what it feels like down there. I don't think I have had such a runny stomach since... I don't know, ever. This is the worst.

Every time I sit on the toilet I read a page or two of "Tales of Alhambra" (I know I should write the title in italics, but it's too much of a hassle). It's by Washington Irving, an American diplomat, who published it in 1832, back when Americans were curious and romantic about the rest of the world. It's kinda hard to read. Too many big words I don't understand. But I'm hangin in there. It's not as if I have a choice. It was the only book that was remotely interesting to me in Nico -- one of my nephew's library. (All three of them are sitting on a long couch playing a video game -- a World War II carnage. I've taken over the poor kid's room since I got to my sister's house in Chihuahua last Sunday. He doesn't mind. He and his brothers Teo and Robert, are such good kids. Miracles, really.)

(My sister Iran just came into the room and asked if I wanted to go out to a club tonight. I said sure. Then she added that she was talking to her friend on the phone and heard that a man was shot and killed an hour ago outside Home Depot. We don't care. We even heard that people were going to stay home tonight to protest against the growing violence. "What kind of protest is that? Staying home? That means you're scared," Teo said. Iran and I agree. Fuck it! We're going to the club!)

One thing about this book I read in the toilet: When I picked it up, I looked inside and I saw this note in my mother's handwriting on the title page:


bought in
Granada at the
Kristopher Kolumbus
24 November 2002

(Kristopher Kolumbus was my mother's last pen name before she died in Spain in 2003.)

She underlined certain words on many pages. Examples: "a faithful, cheery, kindhearted creature, full of saws and proverbs"..."full of adventure"... "We arrived after sunset" ... "drenched with showers"... "few cigars". Under one page, under these words "covered her head with roses" she drew a rose.

I woke up at least five times to go to the bathroom last night. Once on my way back to bed I even checked to see if there were any comments in the moderation queue!

I felt better in the morning, but still very tired and weak. I slept most of the day. When I woke up an hour ago, I read Persian Westender's description of her dream ("Khaab  e Parishab") and it inspired me to write down my own weird dream. This is what I remember after I last woke up:

I was on a semi-loft inside a cabin house that looked almost like an abandoned barn. It was late in the afternoon and getting dark. I noticed Leva Zand and Sanam Dolatshahi (bloggers; I'm friends with both in real life) a few feet away from me. They asked me if they could come under my patoo and I said of course. (For some reason I was sitting under a patoo.) Sanam's thigh brushed against mine but I thought nothing of it. I swear!

We noticed that we weren't in an abandoned barn at all. We could see from above the yellow lights of the living room with a Christmas tree by the entrance and 2 or 3 adults. We were in someone's home without their permission. How were we going to get out of this place? Then Leva's cell phone started ringing and we panicked. We weren't caught by the occupants of the house, but moments later I was outside without Leva and Sanam.

I was walking on an asphalt-paved path by the same house. I saw the owners pass by. They were Americans, one of them a tall man in his late thirties with long wavy hair and a plaid red & black jacket. My presence there did not appear unusual to them. I was just a passer by.

As I was walking along I noticed a caged area with no ceiling. It was an enclosed part of a garden with chairs and a table surrounded by some flowers. What was strange about this was that there were two big cheetahs sitting there.

I was about to continue on this path when suddenly I saw the head of a white sheep stretched towards me. He looked so helpless. He couldn't get out of the "cage" and rescue himself from the two cheetahs, which I guess were going to eat him eventually.

The sheep was struggling so hard... his head and neck were out of the cage... He was pleading with me to save him. His tongue was out and his eyes were bulging with a look of horror.

I took a few pictures of this dramatic scene and walked away.

Isn't that terrible?


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by Teo (not verified) on

nico does not speak farsi...

Kaveh Nouraee


by Kaveh Nouraee on

To answer you in as subtle a way as possible:

Yes, we can imagine.

But, do we really want to imagine that?

Baba...go get a ginger ale.


Feel better  :-)


to feel better....

by ir2244an (not verified) on

Omidvaram behtar bashin :)

this might make you feel better...hope you like it :)



Ms Souri go ahead and send them when you are ready

by Tafreshi on

I am not Gorgani. Tafresh is a collection of towns in "Ostane Tehran". I've had a few friends from Gorgan over the years though. Take care. 


Dear Mr Tafreshi

by Souri on

Thanks for responding ! You are very nice.

No, I won't talk about them here. First, JJ will kick me out :O) if I do this with his blog. second, I have no new dream for now to tell you. but I dream a lot and am sure that I don't need to wait long before one of those big ones come to haunt my night !

I will send it to you by email, if you don't mind. I'm sure you would be able to give me some insights. You are very kind. ....and from your name, I am wondering if you are not a " ham velayati Gorgani" ??


Dear Ms Souri

by Tafreshi on

I thank you for your comments. I did not know much about Mr JJ so I didn't have to get into the details of his dream such as names, places, etc. I read his blog and wrote my interpretation of his dream. I am not a specialist in this field but I've read, observed and taken notes for a while. If you like, I will give your dreams a try too. But it has to be new, freshly dreamt and without any interpretations from you. I like to look at them as soon as they happen. Are you going to publish them here?


Mr. Tafreshi

by Souri on

What a amazing interpretation ! This is very powerful.

I believe in your interpretation. You must know a lot in this domain.

Could I send you some of my dreams for interpretation too, please ?

AS JJ said, it's fascinating !

BTW: I like this " Don Quixtoe" avarar of yours.



Anon Dream Catcher

by Azadeh on

Ok I should have read other posts before writing!

Anonymous Dream Catcher had a similar interpretation regarding the cheetahs and the sheep. We think alike!


My Interpretation...

by Azadeh on

Ok JJ jaan, here's my interpretation. The goat is a metaphor for Iran , innocent and helpless, trapped in a cage with the cheetah/mullahs. You want to help and you do what you can, but you feel helpless so the only thing you can do, as the journalist that you are, is to snap a photo...maybe to bring the message to someone who can help.

Now, if there was a key to the cage lying around and you didn't pick it up or anything...well, then I dunno!!

Ok this started as a joke but now I'm seeing it as more poignant! :P


Fly in the soda bottle!

by Anonymous Iranian (not verified) on

JJ ordeal reminded of my ordeal when I was in Iran.I went to a store and purchased a bottle of soda.I drank the soda,but when I was about to finish drinking it,I notice something that looked like a fly.I threw away the rest of the drink.I did not think about it too much and I went about my business but few hour later I was sick like a dog with fever,tiredness,sleepiness,chills and flue like symptoms.I swear I slept for 24 straight hours.After I woke up I was feeling much better.The amazing thing was that I did not even take any medications for my sickness and the symptoms all went away by themselves.The moral of the story is when out of USA be careful about water,food and air in the host country.



by SALTY on

J I wanted to analyse your dream for you, since I took some Psychology cources back when I got my PSYOP training, but the sailor in me could not get past the fact that you were under the blanket with two hotties! So keep on doing whatever you were doing before tonight,  drink some water from the tap but make sure that you turn off all the cell phones this time!

bajenaghe naghi

jj jan

by bajenaghe naghi on

i pray that soon mezajat seft beshe. nothing is worst than es hal in a foreign country. 

ebi amirhosseini

تعبیر خواب !!

ebi amirhosseini



Iranian Reader

Ey dade bidad

by Iranian Reader on

Khoda bad nadeh! I was going to email you and ask how you're doing. According to Chinese medicine it is good to occasionally get sick as a dog.

I was telling Shahin yesterday I really miss you!


To Nico:Uncle from hell

by mrlayl on


looks like you have a nack for writing. I laughed my head off. If you are really JJ's nephew who wrote these lines, you should be a regular poster here.  JJ you better wtach out, he is very good.

American Wife

you will learn to

by American Wife on

stock your "library" with more appropriate reading material. 

Little thing I remember someone saying after a severe eating/drinking bout.  The same "down there" issue so he ate some ice cream.  Sat there for a few minutes praying "come on ice cream... hurry up".  LOL

Maybe you had to be there.


Dear Dream Catcher

by darius on

Wow , all that  writing for a bad   case of  "Eshal ".Man you should start writing for The Enquirer.

Little Nico says itnicely.

The little man  might not be an adult yet his little sharp mind has taken a big piture of JJ's life.

Let wish JJ  well and pray for him the new move bring him  happiness.JJ needs a  strong woman   with lots of  love ,enegy and influnece in his life and put an end to his patoo dreams .


You should never try to take the dream of a man with bad Eshal seriously, I seriously suggest to put your "dream Catcher " away

until the Eshal is





The pics of that badbakht

by pw (not verified) on

The pics of that badbakht sheep has published and is circulating worldwide as a first dream picture ever..

Jallal khaalegh!


Neither cheetah nor sheep

by Anonymous Dream Catcher (not verified) on

My interpretation of your dream is quite different than others. I believe you’re neither the cheetah nor the sheep, but the Journalist. The cabin house is and you were in the midst of it. Your friends Leva and Sanam represent bloggers of your website. “They asked me if they could come under my ’patoo’”, it is very interesting that they did not ask to come under your “blanket”. Even though the overwhelming majority of what’s written in your website is in English, yet they want to be under your ’patoo’. That of course has to do with your dedication to all things Iranian and providing a ’patoo’ rather than a ’blanket’ for your bloggers to feel at ease to express themselves, hence “I said of course.”

“For some reason I was sitting under a patoo.”, isn’t this how you maintain your website, by sitting behind your laptop, that is to say your patoo that provides cover for others? Then the brushing of Sanam’s thighs against yours is made clear that is not of anything of an inappropriate nature, but a humanly connection. The interpretation of it is that there is nothing personal or cynical going on in your endower. Then you entered into “someone’s home without their permission”, isn’t this a daily encounter for you? By publishing articles, blogs, and comments, aren’t you entering into other people’s lives whether they like it or not. “How were we going to get out of this place?”, speaks of your daily struggle to moderate and what to sensor and what not.

“Leva’s cell phone started ringing and we panicked.”, interpretation: an article, blog, or comment stirs up controversy and all hell breaks loose.

“We weren't caught by the occupants of the house, but moments later I was outside without Leva and Sanam. As I was walking along... ”, interpretation: crises pass by and you move on.

“...I noticed a caged area with no ceiling. It was an enclosed part of a garden with chairs and a table surrounded by some flowers. What was strange about this was that there were two big cheetahs sitting there.”, interpretation: the caged area is Iran, an enclosed garden with flowers. Then your two friendly bloggers disappeared and they are replaced by two big cheetahs, Khamenei and Ahmadinejad

“I saw the heads of a white sheep stretched toward me.”, interpretation: While color is universally known to be symbolic of purity and innocence, and the sheep represent the people of Iran. There is no doubt that you are concern about the plight of Iranian people; his head “stretched toward me“, “looked so helpless”, and “couldn’t get out of the cage and rescue himself from the two cheetahs, which I guess were going to eat him eventually.”

“The sheep was struggling so hard... his head and neck were out of the cage... He was pleading with me to save him. His tongue was out and his eyes were bulging with a look of horror.”, interpretation: need I interoperate this? The symbol logy is overwhelming. The Iranian people are struggling for freedom, yet they are trapped in a cage created by the cheetahs, they want to get out of the case but they are trapped, they are horrified.

“I took a few pictures of this dramatic scene and walked away.” You are a journalist, what can you as a journalist do? Take a picture, document the event of our lives and move on.


Have the lambs stopped

by desi on

Have the lambs stopped crying Clarice?  Sorry, I mean JJ.  That was terrible.  That's what happens when you accidently swallow the worm in the bottom of the tequila bottle.  As for the leaky bottom, I advise a good old Rashti remedy.  Kateh and mast.  Feel better jj jaan.


C.G. couldn't have said it more clearly,

by Monda on

Tafreshi did a fine job.

Nico's comment is so great! Maybe your stay would motivate him to write more, if he isn't already.

Oh JJ my husband had a similar experience once and I could certainly hear it in his voice yelling and damning the world while he was in the there. Good thing your mom's book kept you company during this suffering. 


JJ sorry

by Anonymous77 (not verified) on

but that's really gong anal (pun intended) on us. What's next Freud and diarrheria?

Didn't know you went to that sort of nonsense.


OH my God it is obvious!

by Tahirih on

The part about cheetahs and white sheep is so obvious. Feeling guilty  about letting same of the one thing( multiple ID people) , to attack this  one  white sheep.

Then just taking pictures and leaving them to attack !

Sorry for being so frank , but it is too obvious to me as a case of consciousitis!!! with a touch of burning ,inflamed anus:((

Hope you feel better soon.



Jahanshah Javid


by Jahanshah Javid on

Thank you Tafreshi! I don't know how true your interpretation may be, or if it will help me in any way, but certainly very interesting :o)


Jungian interpretation of your dream

by Tafreshi on

Going under the blanket with two women indicates there are at least two very important women in your life and your persona wants to get in touch with your feminine side of your pysche. No reason to fight it. It is not a sexual desire but a deep recovery from playing a macho/in control role in your daily life (i.e, whose comments gets published, whose comments does not etc).

Moving into a kid's room who is also your nephew is a longing for going back to an earlier times, your childhood, when your life was not as complicated as now. Reading a book with your mother's handwriting has awakened this condition. I don't know what your personal reason to be in Mexico is but your psychological needs have taken over at this time.

Your diarrhea is the manifestation of a strong urge in you to discard everything and start anew. Your are not happy, you're overwhelmed with it all. You want to be free but still in control. These two are contradictory in nature. Your mental condition is manifesting itself physically and it is painful.

The presence of cheetahs in the cage is related to your existance as a man living in post modern times separated from nature. You are the cheetahs and you are also the tame helpless sheep. We'll continue our discussion during the next session.


Uncle from hell

by Nico (not verified) on

Hameh uncle daaran, maa ham uncle daareem! Other uncles come, bring you gifts!!, sit for an hour, and then leave...

"I've taken over the poor kid's room since I got to my sister's house in Chihuahua last Sunday. He doesn't mind."

The hell I don't mind...he has taken over our room, keeps playing and then breaking our toys,his cloths are all over the place, eats tacos and chips in bed with crumps falling all around,...and the icing on the cake is this ,golaab beh rootoon,severe diahrrea( with the key operating word, severe here!)
I don't think paiting the room is going to do it...We have to sell the house after he finally left!

Darius Kadivar

Salamat Bashee !

by Darius Kadivar on

Wiahing You a Quick Recovery Man ..,




signs you're not on your deathbed

by Anonymous77 (not verified) on

been there....

a)you can still read. I was flat out

b) you walked away from the sheep; didn't crawl.

2 shots of serious whiskey, on imodium every 6 hours, overboiled water only, sugar cubes and lime.

Be pleased, you ass is "hot" at your age. ;)

Orang Gholikhani

Welcome to Mexico :-)

by Orang Gholikhani on

JJ jan,

You are in Mexico now and should be carefull about what you eat and what you drink. Tekila could help to purify things ;-)



persian westender


by persian westender on

We have at least one thing in common so far, and it is having “gharashmish” and severe dreams.

But I’m coming to this conclusion that there might be a severe relationship between what we dream and what we eat. You got burritos and chili sauces all over and dreamed of some crap things in a tropical way.

No wonder I had dreams of “zoorkhooneh” and “varzesh bastani” stuff, I remember I had a glass of sharbate khakeshir along with nabat dagh the night before severely.

btw, I will appreciate if you download the pictures of that badbakht sheep you took in here:-)


Ps: In my comment I intentionally used the word ‘severe’ three times, to make it more dramatic and make you even more Pesos….sahme man yadetoon nareh.


Get rest man! I'm getting really worry for you...