Jahanshah Javid

ON jan,

Say more about the dignity part?  You may be on to something?

I wonder if your assumption is women are less prone to recovery from romantic delusions than men?

Also could you please expand on what is given & what is received - in a mutual fascination process? To me, no value can be assigned except by the two involved in that exchange. But I'd love to know your thoughts.

if this doesn't open some right hemispheres I don't know what-

else would:    The Journey 

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice --
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do --
determined to save
the only life you could save. 

  ~ Mary Oliver ~   (Dream Work)  

very nice...

by Jahanshah Javid on Wed Jan 20, 2010 08:33 AM PST

Women are special. Wonderful. So giving, so loving. Ungrateful guys beware: Women's love is not endless or unconditional. And shouldn't be.

And ladies: beware of ungrateful men. I see women continuing to be loving towards guys who should have been thrown in the garbage long ago.

In a relationship, there should be mutual love. If you are giving without receiving or appreciation, you are wasting your love and life.

And there are times when men or women shower love onto someone who's not interested in romance, who cannot return your love. Learn to let go, for your own dignity and sanity.

Very good read

Enjoyed reading it. 

more 3rd person observations on Kayhan

First of all by "You Know" I meant to underscore your ability to see how hopeless human's condition has become on this planet. Physically and existentially. There's little that good humans can do to mediate atrocities and injustice anywhere.  Especially back home for us. We have been seriously reminded of that reality since June, again. So humbling and depressing. 

You know that since Iranians have been emotionally kon fayakooned so much, it's easier to fantasize about settling on another planet rather than another spot on earth. To me, Kayhan experienced a similar disappointment where he was. Who knows the intensity of his dilemma for sure.  It is always easier for a third person to advise "lengesh kon", but I trust, by reading your story, he must have been sufficiently disillusioned in order to flee with his love to Safety.  That is what true love offers digeh. Otherwise why didn't he and his woman stay at the same place?  So there was some utopia-searching and urge for change involved.  And that woman happened to be there. I'm home sick so I can go on writing this sort of band e tonbooni feedback until my eyes get dry :o)

I'm still bugged though by not getting Ari's spiritual conclusion.  Love God thing is so foreign to me. I can't for the life of me equate god with safety. Oh well..

Since you insist...

I just posted mine! But as I said, yours is way better! Plus, it's so late and I am so tired that I'm afraid tomorrow morning - with lucidity - I might have a second thought!

But for now dear JJ and my dear Monda...you can read whatever I've written so far.

Az.

PS: Also, if I wasn't so tired, I'd have discussed more about your process of writing, etc...Good night! 

Not too far from real life

Thanks Monda for your take on the story. I can only say that your third person and professional view may be seeing some truths which I did not intend or may be buried in my mind.

What's certain is that the human/robot part of the story was only an excuse to get to the main issue: love. That's not too far from real life. Love trumps all. Or rather love CAN trump all when the right partner comes along.

Nazy: blew me away

Ari jan, you should know ...

I read this story as I read others, with knowledge that it's been written on earth by another earthling :o)  I am so in the Here and Now that I cannot see the spiritual connections of love and God in JJ's piece.  May be because I believe God is an element that science has not proven yet.

Anyhow, with all due respect I cannot follow your link between love and god. In Rumi I can.  But not in this piece.

You tried and I appreciate learning from you - always. 

But You Know :o)

(I've been sitting here soaking in your compliment)  

When I read your story this morning, it was clear to me that Kayhan was disappointed with the Humanity itself and all the scientific applications that he had invested his life in. This is not uncommon on any planet, any generation - DSM IV calls it Phase of Life Problem.  I call it Phase of Life Condition. With maturity and emotional strength and other personal insights and experiences - there comes a time when we can afford to re-eveluate our goals. Absolutely nothing wrong with that. Very healthy if you ask me.

Now my point of interest in your story is not so much the human vs robot issue (although you wrote it sensibly).  In your story, it sounds like the woman Kayhan is in love with has given him the safety and motivation to try life from a different perspective. May be that is why Kayhan feels such a strong feeling for her. The woman is the embodiment of his new inquiries.  

JJ you should know that in writing the above, I made the following assumptions:

1)  Based on your information in this piece, psychodynamically-speaking, Kayhan's ego functions and reality-testing are in tact.

2)  He knows in his gut what this particular woman is about. He trusts her.

3)  Baing a scientist, he has loved and been loved, therefore has validated his assumptions of Love in variety of shapes and forms, many times over. Why this woman?  He knows.   

Dear JJ, I also enjoy writing with whatever skills I have

Dear Jahanshan, I liked what you wrote about writing experience.  I feel the same way too.  I am also aware of my inadequate grammar, spelling, vocabulary. But I try to enjoy the writing journey.

Holy Molana!

Wow! Wowww! Thanks Nazy. What an amazing find! Perfect!

Molana's similar sentiments about becoming one with love

این بار من یک بارگی در عاشقی پیچیده‌ام
این بار من یک بارگی از عافیت ببریده‌ام

دل را ز خود برکنده‌ام با چیز دیگر زنده‌ام
عقل و دل و اندیشه را از بیخ و بن سوزیده‌ام

...
...
چندانک خواهی درنگر در من که نشناسی مرا
زیرا از آن کم دیده‌ای من صدصفت گردیده‌ام

در دیده من اندرآ وز چشم من بنگر مرا
زیرا برون از دیده‌ها منزلگهی بگزیده‌ام

...
...

//www.hamidnazemi.com/gallery/music/asheghi.p...

don't worry--you're pretty good

and don't even get me started on my spelling inadequacies....

Limited skills

Thanks for the good advice anonymous111.2. I need it.

I'm painfully aware of my inadequate grammar, spelling, vocabulary. Still I try to enjoy the writing experience with whatever skills I have :)

Not bad, not bad :-)

Pretty creative, dude.  I can see Star Trek's influence in your story, especially, the original feature film, this one:

  //www.imdb.com/title/tt0079945/

remember when the officer "joins" with V-ger, which is actually the old spacecraft "Voyager" that has gained self awareness?  

if I may be bit critical, you may want to use present tense with positive effect.  For example, instead of saying: "Kayhan's body began to disintegrate into static", you can say: Kayhan's body "disintegrates" into static.  It has more of an immediate effect upon, and more of a "connection" with, the reader.  I make the same mistake quite often and am reminded of it accordingly.  Good story overall.  Thanks for sharing.   

For everlasting love, press here!

Thanks Ari. First of all in my previous comment I meant that we are all awaiting your own Sci-Fi story. Toolesh nadeh :)

Your analysis in very interesting. I am familiar with Rumi, more with his rubaiyat, and very little of his masnavi stories. "2001 Space Odyssey" is one of my favorite movies and I grew up with Star Trek, the original series, although I have watched most of the Picard generation too. I'm sure all of them have influenced me.

I wrote this story in four hours without thinking of any of the above. I like writing dialogue so that part was easy. I originally wanted to turn a pet dog into a human. I even imagined having a conversation with a fury collie on two feet after he got a human brain. But it was too complicated (and ridiculous) so I went with a robot instead.

As for the state of love, Rumi and the Sufi tradition: the difference here is that Kayhan took the (super) easy route and just loaded a "program" and ran off with his love into the universe. It's an interesting concept, but real love in the real world comes with hard work, maturity, humility, surrender, unselfishness and all those wonderful qualities.

Now the question is, if science developed a pill that made a person lose 50 pounds in a week without health risks, is that just as good as regular exercise and modest easting habits?

The same question applies to love. Is Rumi's version of love just as valid as the effects generated from pressing a button?

I guess once Kayhan united with his love and wiggled his way out of all other aspects of life, it wasn't a moral/spiritual question anymore. It felt beautiful and lasted forever.

Anyway... I enjoyed writing this.

Monda ,brief review of JJ's story as requested

To be more concrete here's an abbreviated story from the famous Rumi poem (excerpt) which illustrates the Man-becoming-God (pure love) concpet that JJ has put in his story:

A lover goes to his beloved's house and knocks. The beloved says "Who is it?" He says, "It is I." She says go away, you're still not ready. So he goes on a sojourn, comes back smarter and knocks again. This time when the lover asks "Who is it?" he says, it is you. She (effectively) says now that you are me, you are already inside since there is only one me in the house of Love.

The Western side of JJ's story is reflected in the influence of Isaac Asimov and Arthur C. Clarke. The movie Centennial Man, and the character Data in Star Trek are based on Asimov's humanoid robots aspiring to become human (one even become US president).

Asimov does not have the spiritual depth of someone who grew up with Rumi, but Arthur C. Clarke, gets closer. Clarke's 2001 a Space Odyssey (in collaboration with Kubric) introduces the super smart HAL computer and asks the question that if machines can be made that are smarter than humans then what is the status of humans on the stage of evolution? Clarke rebufs the idea that human emotions make the difference because he makes HAL so jealous and insecure the computer lies and commits murder.  The oblique answer the book (and movie) gives is that machines don't have a divine destiny, whereas humans do. Odd from an accomplished scientist like Clarke!

JJ, who is a writer with roots in Rumi's culture has taken this divine destiny to a deeper and more specific level: the union with Love.

How did I do, JJ?

Appreciation

Anahid: Lotf dari. And I'm very happy you stepped into the ring and wrote your story. It's inspiring us all.

MPD: I respect your taste. Honored that you liked it.

Monda: It's your beautiful mind that sees beauty in here. You should also give your professional view as a therapist. While Kayhan is "proud" that he helped machines become human, he is tired of his own humanity and all the hardships that come with it.

Princess: Since you didn't like Avatar, I consider you the toughest critic. Relieved that you enjoyed it.

Azarin: Stop it! Send me your story NOW :)

Ari: I'm flattered my friend. I wish I had read one of Clarke's books! Eagerly awaiting your story. Don't keep us waiting too long!

Ari could you please elaborate?

on how man became God in this scenario?

Azarin jan, please at least send Me yours

OK? I'd love to read it especially if it contains some erotica :o)  

So beautiful!

The best Sci-Fi so far!

Dear JJ,

After reading your story, I just gave up on writing mine!

Brilliantly written!

Azarin

Superb

Thoroughly enjoyed this story. superb imagination. Those fish better to hope that forgetfulness is not one of the qualities that have been passed to the robots.

Nirvana in a space age!

Sweet! Definitely romantic, but many other things as well, there are many layers to this story. Enjoyed reading it. Thank you!

... now I have to read the other ones in this series. :) 

Dear romantic JJ, I wish you much Love...

to keep you perpetually afloat in a peaceful galaxy. With minimum sadness and disappointment. And lots of dark chocolate and gentle nudges. 

What a beautiful piece you wrote.... Kayhan's wisdom is fascinating!

Very creative

A good read.

Suspension of disbelief

Thanks Cost-of-Progress. I appreciate it. I'm scientifically challenged and therefore I could not go into credible detail on how things worked or happened, such as transforming machines into humans or humans into a single state.

I relief heavily on suspension of disbelief :)

Gentle nudge

Thanks Nazy. Glad you enjoyed it. You have a point that in the future SpaceBook would probably give you more exciting options than just poking. Although I still like the idea of a gentle nudge.

Dear Jahanshah, your story was beautiful and romantic

Dear JJ, I liked your story and I was going to write that it was sci-fi and romantic but Nazy jan had already used this wording.  I liked the machine becoming human and experiencing the feeling of sadness. My favorite part was this exchange between Kayhan and Hafez 73:

''Oh have no doubts about it. Being human is a life-long struggle. I often wished I was a machine. It's so much easier not to think or feel. But we're stuck with it and we endure the best we can.

-- Let me enjoy humanity for a few days before you completely crap on it!"

Great story and wonderful exchange.