Sex After Marriage Stops


by Parham

Here's why I'll be with my girlfriend tonight and not my wife.
Two phone calls this afternoon:

Me: Hey sweetie, my mom called and she wants the kids to stay over tonight. What do you say I pick up a bottle of wine and we open up the hottub.
Wife: No, John, you know Tuesdays are difficult days. I had carpool this morning and I'm just too tired. . . .

Me: Hey sugar, you want to get a drink tonight after work?
Girlfriend: Why don't we just go to my place?


My wife reads in the kitchen until I fall asleep to avoid having sex with me, or if I am not tired, she waits until I am in the shower and then gets into bed and goes to sleep.


Prior to marriage: Real sex is unequivocal to anything else, including food and oxygen. Porn is only there if you're in-between girls. Up to four years of marriage: Sex is great and when you finish with the foreplay (usually 30 minutes of begging), you have a pretty good time. Porn is okay
After four or more years of marriage: Sex = Been there, done that, nothing new. Porn is now the better since at least you're seeing something new and fresh. Sorry girls, we love you forever, but even eating steak and lobster gets old if you do it too much.


My take on marriage: It's a great way to complicate an otherwise amicable business relationship with sex.


I can remember my last blowjob like it was yesterday. Actually it was six years ago the day before I got married. Sex then was four to five times a week. Now I have a four year old son who sleeps in my bed with my wife more nights a week than I do. Sex now maybe once a month. Triple that for vacation sex. I have noticed that the rate goes up for a short period of time but drops off quickly when large purchases are made (house, Landrover, shopping sprees, new floors, etc). I am thirty eight, not happy, and slowly methodically plotting my way out. I always love the look in the eyes of my friends who say that won't happen to them.


When we were changing for the reception after the wedding and I tried to kiss her (and after 3 years of mind-bending sex), my wife of 45 minutes said "No more of that. We're married now."


My wife was a frigid, shriveled bitch. Before we were married, we had plenty of sex, but as soon as we passed the six month mark after our wedding, she stopped being interested. My wife only fucks when she "feels sexy." Translation: when I give her jewellery. She is just a withered old bag at the age of 35.


My granddad told me an insightful story before my wedding. He said for the first year of marriage to put a penny in a jar every time I had sex with my wife. Starting in year two, take out two pennies every time we had sex. He said there'd be money in the jar when I died. I think he's going to be right.


I've been married 15 years and my wife and I have lived most of that as brother and sister. There has been no sex AT ALL for the last four years. Get a girlfriend or get used to it. Marriage is all about learning how to do without sex.


My wife reached a point where she only uses sex to get something, and she doesn't happen to want anything at the moment.


My GF was damn good to me, in and out of the sack. We probably had sex, on average, 10-15 times a week. Anywhere and everywhere. Even a once a day BJ on average. Things were great.
That was, until we got married. A day later, everything had changed. Got it once on the honeymoon, and she told me to "hurry up and finish". When I ask her why she never initiates anything, never even flirts anymore, when she used to before, she says "I was trying to get you to marry me then".


I have been married 3 times. Yup, slooooowwww learner. Each time it was good/great sex before marriage and lucky to have any sex after the first year of marriage.


No more sex. Period. She's too busy spending my money putting traventine in the entryway, redoing the kitchen with Corian, redecorating the bedroom, having parties, and all that other shit, or talking to girlfriends incessantly about the same.


Wife is overweight, no sex, doesn't cook anything not in a can. 3 kids. I am stuck. I can't even cheat on her since we do a mail order company out of the house. No alone time, no peace.
I think I am going crazy.
Oh, another fun aspect - wife is a born again Christian, so if I bring up the sex issue she uses the bible to justify herself. I argue that, and kazam, I am Satan, and no sex for Satan. If I do not argue, no sex for me either.


I used to pay a lot for sex, like my whole salary.
Then I got a divorce and now sex is easy, fun and free!


My little sis is married and has two kids under 6 years. She says that sex to her is "just one more person wanting something from me".


I walked into a large bedroom when my wife was changing into her outfit to get on the plane to start our honeymoon, admired her gorgeous half-naked figure with a 'you wanna knock one out right here and now' look on my face, and she said, "Oh, no. None of that nonsense. We're married now." I mean she changed *instantly* from this funny happy woman into this scheming bitch who just had plans to buy and redecorate a big house and throw parties in it with my money.


Here is a typical married woman:
I give birth to your kids and you complain we don't have sex? How do you think they were born, osmosis? Who takes care of them, drives them to school, picks them up for after school activities, drives them to sports, takes them to their friends houses, plays chauffeur, cleans, cooks, goes to PTA meetings and then caters to your sorry whiney ass when you get home. To top it off after you eat, fart or burp you walk out the door and go out with your buddies.

You want sex? Go fuck yourself! I'm too tired.


Taken from //


more from Parham

Late, but still ;)

by MiNeum71 on

I never had any problems with my girlfriends regarding our sex lives, and even sometimes it was truly goddamn exhausting to me.

Maybe self-criticism can help making things work better.



I just don't understand this

by English guy (not verified) on

I just don't understand this problem of sex dying down after time. My wife and I have been together for eight years and we still enjoy a very regular sex life.

I'm sorry, but in my opinion if a wife loses interset in sex with her husband, maybe he is lacking in ability. Guys, stay fit and healthy, show her much love and all will be fine.

As for needing novelty and a 'change of scenery', well, lay off the porn and you might rediscover how beautiful your wife is, even if she doesn't match up to those air-brushed, online beauties.


How depressing! Parham

by n.zanincanadai on

How depressing!

Parham jan, let's assume for the sake of fun that you posted this blog with serious intentions. So I will leave a serious comment.

Like most human beings, you seem to enjoy talking about sex.
That's normal. Most people think about sex very often, even if they don't want to admit it (why not?? I will never understand). So if like most people you are pre occupied with sex, join the club! Banafsheh can be a hermit but most people aren't.

But here's the thing. Part of good sex, is novelty. And this is true for both genders. So when the novelty wears off, which in most cases happens after a few years and that, in turn, naturally coincides with the progression of a relationship to the point of marriage, people are out of sex. So it's not marriage per se. Nor is it a male female problem. It's just's time. Now, some people claim that they are still hot for each other 35 years into a relationship. I believe they are exaggerating and dishonest. But who knows for sure...

Let's assume for a minute that you are a 35 year old woman. At your sexual peak. Let's say you've been with your lover 7 years. This lover may or may not be your husband. The main point is that you've been together for a while. In most cases you're probably married. Well, it's not so new anymore. You can predict most of his movements. You know when he is going to want it. You know how he is going to want it. And you know, that he knows, those exact same things about you. That;s comforting and there may be lots of love. But the novelty is just gone. That's normal. You cannot expect to have what you had in day one. It's very unrealistic and maybe even undesirable. I mean after 7 years, if you are still unfamiliar with each other something is wrong.

Remember this though, if a woman is hot for a guy, she will NEVER have a headache. Even if she does, she is so turned on that she won't care. If a woman vacuums after sex, or starts to talk about errands, well, she just isn't into you anymore! Even if she loves you.

I'm sure men can relate to this too because they might feel the same way about their women.

But it's not so bleak. Other things come and go and make things hot and cold. It's never constant. Vacations come, mehmoons come, promotions, new shopping sprees, new car, death in the family, illnesses...up and downs. Then, it just makes it work if 2 people are generally compatible.

Solution? I don't know. Staying single...maybe. But then what the heck do you do when you get tired of dating? And sometimes, don't you want a person who is too familiar to have sex with you? Doesn't that have a homely kind of charm? Some poeple have lovers on the side. That could be one solutions. But it's playing with fire,

I am NOT talking about my own experiences. I am still a virgin and will remain so until I hit menopause. This is stuff I picked up from the movies. My lover and I just look at each other and say ghorboonet beram.



by FarshMan (not verified) on

Banafsheh khanoom,

What Parham is saying is not to Iranian women only. It applies to most women and most marridges in general. And It is very true, no matter if he did copy and paste or it was his original thoughts. That's why 52% of marridges end up in divorce and out of the other 48%, half of them, the couples are stuck because of the children or the fact that getting divorce is too costly. Go figure!

Thank you Parham

Curious Joe

Difference between a man's job and the man's wife

by Curious Joe on

Generally, the job sucks after a few years.

Darius Kadivar

You want a Sex Education ;0)

by Darius Kadivar on

Make sure to take notes:

Monty Python John Clease in the Meaning of Life:


bajenaghe naghi

Parham jan

by bajenaghe naghi on

It is  more like PEEF than POOF.


You are right. Before marriage sex is pulled out of the hat and is given to you on a silver tray every where like the rabbit that comes out of the magician's hat. After marriage both the rabbit and the hat conveniently disappear. 


the art of making love is forgotton

by in my humble opinion (not verified) on

Cameron Batmanglich's poem is posted now, "Beyond the flesh". it's beautiful, i think everyone needs to read it.


Another Waste of Space

by Banafsheh (not verified) on


There is nothing original in Parham's post. It is entirely cut and pasted from elsewhere. Why is it shown on the first page? The blogs section is nowadays filled with this type of posts. Shouldn't this be posted in the News and Opinions column? Of course in there, all we have is some people post Farsi articles, too, which are useless for many people who can't read Farsi. "Blogs" that aren't blogged by your users and "News" which cannot be used by your users. You figure!


You copied and pasted another Iranian-woman-hating article not too long ago. You are really not very funny and your sources are not funny, either, I'm sorry. It's so obvious that you are pre-occupied with sex. Why don't you just get some? Pay for it, beg for it, or do it yourself, but please make sure next time you sit down to blog for, you actually have something of substance to say. Good luck.


parham ,parham!!!!!

by zareen (not verified) on

All you have here is complaining!!! as a woman ,happily married for a long time , and having great sex with my husband after so many years , I have to say that you forgot to mention one thing!!!
And that thing is the emotional tie between husband and all those scenarios instead of nagging and plotting for a quickie!!! husbands should have gone to ask how she is doing, helping her, listening to her and being a great friend , then they get some and more!!!!
Before marriage women they get those stuff from their girl friends and when they see you , they are ready for sex. but after marriage you have to be a friend , touching thier soul then you can touch the rest.
as far as my husband , he isnot doing any of those!!!he is just so cute, that's why he is so lucky!!!!!!( kidding ).

Ali P.


by Ali P. on

Parham jaan:

 Don't beat around the bush.

 Are you recommending us, single men, to stay single?


Ali P.