I Have a Crush on Alex Trebek

Being a middle aged Iranian woman, I enjoy watching the true crime investigation TV show called 48 hours. It's one of my few pleasures in life besides making fruit preserves and guessing the Daily Doubles.

Occasionally, a few Iranians have popped up on the show throughout the years. Recently a very sweet Iranian student came up as the innocent roommate on an episode about the big loan scammer "Esther Reed" who was recently caught after 10 years.  

On Saturday night, a jackpot episode came my way. Usually I have Saturday Night Fever so I go to bridge club, but it was Valentine's day and most of the bats have lovers and all I have is a fish.

During this episode, the producers of 48 hours went to the "hot spots" (The Sunset Room, Spaago) in Los Angeles with hidden cameras in their dashboard "speakers" to see if their bow-tied Valet would dare steal $10 USD or $400 black plastic sunglasses. Guess the answer!

My favorite case involved a woman who hid her purse which contained $14,000 dollars under a smelly and large blue gym towel in the back seat of her Ford Focus. 

4/5 of the Valets were sexy Iranian men who were shown stuffing their jeebs with (now very worthless) dollars. One of them tipped himself $7,000 USD from that lady's Ford Focus. When the camera crew caught up with him before the court proceedings, the camera man asked him "Why did you steal $7,000 from a car that was trusted to you?"

He flashed his dreamy Iranian eyes from under his rainbow Oakly glasses and said "Come on man. If I was a Teef, you tink I would steal just $7,000? I vould have taken all of it. Give me a break."

So classy it hurts! But he DID get a break. One of the great things about living in Iran is the charming spin on 48 hours there. There the criminals are brought on TV to admit to their crimes and apologize to victims. I wish they could do the same here. Instead, this jerk came on TV and made an ass out of himself and all the decent Ethiopian valet servicemen world wide.

If this idiot had any brains to balance all that beauty (yes, he was super dangerously sexy ladies if you like curly Iranian mullets and teeth that haven't been flossed since 1994) he would have blamed it on IRI. Everything can be blamed on IRI. If you have cancer? drug addiction? Internet addiction? Cheated on your wife? IRI is at fault. If I was his lawyer, I'd have told him to blame IRI then we could have co-authored a memoir about IRI ruining our lives and why we came to the US to pursue our dreams.