Rendd

Thanks Irandokht jan,

For me at this stage the biggest challenge is to find out who I am any more. For 9 years I was a husband and father and nothing else.

I grew up in a medium size family. Being the oldest kid I was the one going around the table picking up food off my siblings plate ;O) I think all the damnation I got from then is now catching up with me. :O)

That's a nice observation about the difference of praying at the table in the two cultures. I like the more elaborated version where you can calm down and concentrate by thanking god for it.

It can also be a good educational source for the kids about the manners at the table. 

Thanks again!

Dear Rendd

I hope you're feeling better now. It's always hard to deal with such changes in your life in anticipation and during the holidays. 

Just a light-hearted comment related to your blog: Americans thank God before they eat their food, Iranians do it after they're done (usually saying khoda ro shokr after we're done eating). This might show our suspicious nature, we don't give thanks until we're certain we have received the food, or maybe they all knew my brother in law who would circle the table and take your best piece of tahdig out of your plate! that's why we made sure we never closed our eyes and ate before we thanked God for the food.

:o)

Keep your chin up friend

IRANdokht

Simply Thanks Yolanda!

I'll be ok!

Yolanda,

Funny you said that...I too started smoking also and keep thinking about Jennings too.

Yolanda,

Let me tell you a story. I don't know if you are an Iranian or not but there are some codes amongst us that only us undrestand it.

There was a big physical fight between a son and a father in one of the poor neighborhoods in southern Tehran, as the son was beating hard on his father a passer by who was watching stopped and joined forced and started beating on the son. All of a sudden father and son got united and started beating the crap out of the passer by.

After they gave him a good beating they stopped. The passer by who was amongst other things also very shocked asked them why they stopped beating each other and started beating him? The father said beause that was a fight between two bloods not a matter that strangers get involved with.

I am saying this because I look at thoes fights that you see on other blogs as the same thing. It is also love. For someone like my wife who tries to make sense of these based on American standard it is hatred but believe or not it is not. It is too much emotions that all comes from love.

Thanks for your observation and yes I am fully aware of their love and they know that I know it. But I can not find words to answer it because the only answer to love is nothing but love.

chon ghalam andar neveshtan mishetaft ...chon be eshgh amad ghalam bar khod shekaft....

Love you all!

.......

 Hi! Rendd,

        My former Iranian teacher was (or is) going thru divorce also....I took his class 2 years ago. I saw him smoking before the class a lot...I asked him why he told me that he is going thru nasty divorce.....I begged him quit smoking and told him that lung cancer is a fast killer (sorry, I have to be honest!) and killed Peter Jennings in 4 months......you are definitely not alone......I pray that your wife's heart is softened....you never know she may change and become reasonable...you just have to keep your cool, so it won' escalate the situation.......I read other blogs on IC, sometimes people are not very kind, considerate, and understanding....they are pretty harsh.....people are really nice to you and want to see you bounce back 'cause you are very sincere, nice, and courteous...Hang in there, good luck, and take a good care of yourself! 

Sincerely,

Delaram Banafsheh (Yolanda)

"Cactus in the Desert"

All,

I am guilty. I am guilty of forgetting you while letting them to fool me with their shiny merchandise that masks the ugly truth, the hallow drum that sounds laud, the worn out mirror that has no light on its own but fictitiously reflects only a part of other lights. I am guilty of letting them drag me away from my original roots.

But this time is different. I will never forget you again!

Khar,

Thanks for your wonderful video. I was driving and couldn't get it on my phone. I just got home to my computer and watched it. Thanks a lot bro!

Yolanda,

I wish my wife could see this too so she wouldn't treat me like shit because all she and her family could see was the twisted images of us through the dirty media sewage and couldn't see this image of us as love in Iranians runs deeper than two inches. Last time I spoke to her and insisting her to stay in the marriage do you know what she said amongst other horrible things? That the reason I don't want divorce it's because it's a honor thing for me (same as the idea of honor killing).

......

 Hi Rendd,

         I just want to say that you are very lucky that so many compassionate people poured out their hearts to give you the emotional support and comforting words. I am deeply touched by their outpouring of support for you.......people come together for you..this is a great thread 'cause everyone is so kind and sincere! Thank you for your blog and I hope you are feeling a little better!

Take care!!

Delaram Banafsheh (Yolanda)

"Cactus in the Desert"

Rendd Aziz

No one can truly grasp they way you're feeling in your heart right now, the healing will start within you it may not be tonight, tomorrow or next month but it will happen soon and that is a promise, get ready. Keep the light shining in your heart and take those baby steps again, keep on talking and keep on expressing yourself. Our brain is naturally programmed to forget even the worst pains through the passage of time.

Shamloo: 

khar jan ghadam ranjeh farmoodeed

Be in kolbeye hagheere ma...

Be kojaye in shabe teereh biaveezam in abaye zhendeye kheesh ra?

I'm amazed of this huge subculture that now I am getting the to be a member of. However, it feels like hell and looking at the person sitting next to you won't ease the pain any better.

Rendd We Love You Man!

You are not alone, there are many other people has gone through what you are going through and I'm one of them. All I can tell you my freind This Shall Pass too! hang in there, you have Yourself buddy!

Let it be:

aaaliye

I'll take you up on that ride! I like the good news!! Keep that momentum going. If you need a friend in Houston, email me!

Yours,

Omid

Dear Rendd, Happy Thxgiving. Glad that your spirit is uplifted

 Rendd aziz, thanks for writing that you love my name and writing. Thanks also for rest of your compliments.  Even if you were hitting on me, it would be Ok :),  after all I am divorced myself.

مگر این ایرانین دات کام گره از بخت من و جمعی مطلق/مطلقه دیگر دراین سایت باز کند.

Thanks everyone for your wonderful comments..

I am glad I posted this blog because as a result my attitude is changed and my spirit is uplifted. I just was invited to attend a live play of a blues band.

Thank you all! I will keep all of you in mind while listening to the wonderful sound of blues.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving and watch for the low-flying turkeys in your dreams since over eating can cause nightmares! ;O)

Thanks Omid jan...

Hey if I buy it I might even let you ride it for 10 yards. ;O)

Nevertheless I got a good job offer and I am planning to move out of Yankee land and settle down south in Cowboy land. I have lived in south before for a short time and I think Iranians are culturally more adapt to the south than the north.

Rendd, afarin

beshnavam ke savare harley hastin, kayf mikonam. it sounds like you deserve it!

Yours,

Omid

Thanks Yolanda,

And the same to you...Happy Thanksgiving!

.......

 Thank you for your blog! You are very brave to share with us your challenge in life. My favorite lines from your post are:

I still think love is beautiful! No, it's the most beautiful!

I agree with you on that! Hang in there and May God bless you!

************************* 

Hi! Nazy,

     I love your video and I have saved it! Thank you! It is so beautiful!

*************************
Hi! Anahid,

     I like your comments!

************************* 

Hi Natalia,

      I enjoyed reading all your posts! Take care!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Delaram Banafsheh (Yolanda)

"Cactus in the Desert"

Oh come on now..........

I think my friend did rather well. Especially, in such short notice. I understand the meaning well.

You are such a funny man. :o)

Happy Thanksgiving!

Your freind needs a better persian-to-english dictionary...

I said POETIC vocabulary..I could do that myself. Poor Sohrab is now shaking in his grave. :O) I was kidding. I think a simple translation is most appropriate for a poet who aimed to be simple all his life. Thanks!

moraghebe khodet bash dooste man.........:o)

My friends translation:

"Sometimes the wounds that I've had on my feet have taught me the ups and downs of the earth" 

-Sohrab Sepehri

Natalia,

Ok then we put you on watch ;O) have a wonderful night and happy Thanksgiving!

Oh no you didn't........:o)

tsk tsk

I tell you what. Can you keep a secret? Shhhhhhhh! So can I! hahaha

I'm not talking. lol

Natalia,

So how MUCH do you know?...in case we want to say something not wanting you to know it ;O)

I would love to see

his paintings but I have a feeling that they are all in Iran. Perhaps, I can find them on line.

I am learning Persian one step at a time. :o) I know some words and phrase.

At times people on the web site wonder. Hmmm "how much Persian does she know?" lol

Well, it is almost midnight on my part of the world.

shab bekheyr

Nazy,

I'd like to know how you liked everlast's music?

Natalia,

You've got to learn Persian. Sohrab's poems are closer to music and painting than words. He was also a good painter. I've seen his original painitngs and they are astonishingly simple but awesome.

If you mean me......

I came across the Iranian community when I was looking for further understanding on Middle Eastern culture. My own version of independent study.

The first person I met was an Iranian woman through a language exchange program (on line).

As I searched for information, I came across iranian.com and the rest as they say is history.

PS: My now ex-husband is Mexican.